Since everyone's talking about Hasbro DnD's snub of Gary the Gygaxian, let's dig through my original 1979 copy of the AD&D DMG and see where exactly all the problematic language started. Considering I partially learned English by reading it... 🤔

@author_VV Holler!

@CorpseKings The Spaniard. So you can always say, "Bring me The Spaniard" in the voice of Antonio Banderas.

@Gingerblast Counterpoint .... How big is the monk?

@threelinestudio @iAnonPatriot Bargain for the 51st state, settle for increased enforcement against drug and human trafficking.

@mikemearls Backwards compatible means no stat blocks or encounters dependent on rulesets, or even references to game systems (i.e. beholders). Considering we adjust stats constantly for our parties, they're irrelevant anyways.

There is a problem with the Federal promotion process. You're rewarded for starting things like a task force, but you don't need to finish the job before putting it on your promotional package. The solution would be to have a 3rd party rank your application since they know the game. Right now it's ranked internally, allowing for nepotism.

In honor of MLK Day, please enjoy 20% off our flagship products (Simulockrum, Simuhackrum) in our Etsy store through this Monday!

We'll close out our trip down memory lane by one last "suggestion" from the DMG: Potion components! I do realize that it's a great side quest for adventuring parties to gather these raw materials, but really... a Potion of Giant Control needs the brain of the same giant type? Why would I need a potion? If I can harvest its brain, I'd just go out and smack the giant around if it was giving me problems. Similarly, I held a poll once, and the most common potions that adventurers would stock AND use, were Invisibility and Water Breathing. I'm not sure how to keep an invisible stalker around, much less what to grab in order to "milk its ichor." Same with holding a water naga, or raising free range nixies for their organs. What's with having to harvest intelligent creatures, Gary?? Maybe that institutionalized racism chart had some bite after all. There's a lot of human supremacy in these here charts... 🤪 Or hey, maybe remember it's your game and you get to decide if those tables are valid. Like Gary said, these are ultimately just guidelines. He gave us a lot of charts, numbers, and tools. That's it. Racism is a feeling. What's the best part of a feeling? You can never be wrong. If you say, "I feel hungry," what's my response? "No you don't?" 🤔 Likewise, when they say this is for equality, remember that true equality means nobody will give a crap about you. You will be looked at and dismissed in the same breath. Interracial couples used to be stared at. Nowadays, they just blend into the background. How many of these activists are working towards being ignored as nothing special? Game on, people. We've got kingdoms to save.

@AuthorGFAllen I voluntarily hallucinate as I stare at squiggles on dead pieces of vegetation, yes.

@The_Lord_Otter Literally writing my three year campaign into novel form as we speak. Already put out the module for it too.

This might make my Rule list for successful groups. Rule 1 - If you're at the table, sit with the goal to entertain everyone else. (Players and DMs) Rule 2 - If everyone's laughing at your character's antics (I fireball the tavern!), it's all good. If they're not, stop. Rule 3 - Everyone will know each other's backstories, even the terrible secrets that Nobody Can Ever Know. Otherwise we can't enjoy your subplots, because the party missed the plot hook. Rule 4 - This is not therapy or a dating game. We're going to pan to the fireplace because I'm not coming up with a personality for every whore in the brothel.

@AuthorGFAllen Heck, I'll market my own book under your replies. The hustle must be respected! Moar!