Wonderkitty, Eldritch Millennial
@TehWonderkitty
Followers
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She/Her/Hers. The natural state of humanity is community, not hierarchy. Insubordinate since 1998. Opposed to suffering and all structures that perpetuate it.
Joined June 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Neither cruelty nor suffering are inevitable.
Pain, loss, & grief are parts of the human experience, but they needn't be suffering.
Suffering happens when we fail to hold space for these human experiences, fail to embrace the vulnerability they represent, and /1
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Kids, I am BEGGING you to embrace the reality that the only difference between you and somebody who went to prison is that the cops showed up on their worst day and they were busy elsewhere when you had yours.
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My tweet about jury duty was very popular so I feel perhaps I wasn't understood:
The "fuck the state" move isn't skipping jury duty.
The best way to fuck the state is to show up, solemnly swear to be unbiased and then resolutely refuse to convict.
Pls unfollow if you no like
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But srsly: SO MUCH ex parte communication between judges and DAs just gets blown off, constantly.
Every defense atty knows it, knows it's happening, knows it's bad and unconstitutional but can't prove shit.
That's why we ALL want Steel to bury Glanville with the recipts.
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No, but seriously I got put on a criminal jury.
I still can't believe it.
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I know my tweets only reach the like-minded, but please, when you're summoned for jury duty, instead of looking at it as a chore, please consider that it is the greatest opportunity you will ever have as an individual to check the power of the state.
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I literally do not know how to convince people who have never stepped foot near a jail or prison that no one is getting clean in jail or prison.
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@LizCGil
I literally just got to work (late, idgaf), sat down and stared blankly at my computer thinking : what the fuck am I doing here?
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@molls
@Liz_Alfreda
@FromHerOwnAshes
@ask_aubry
Yah they co-opt military/military-ish terms to make being a lying little shit sound cool.
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@kyliejustine
@wonderlandmom
Yes, absolutely yes. I think that's the distinction ppl don't get. When your young child is joyfully doing a thing and you just tell them to stop, maybe sarcastically, they do not understand that it's *just too much* at that moment.
They internalize that *they* are too much.
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@LizCGil
I'm the only attorney in my office who is also a woman. I have shut my door and am wearing my "I don't know shit about fuck" t-shirt in hopes of dissuading the men I work with, who I adore under normal circumstances, from trying to talk to me today.
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That public defender urge to throw things when your judge has never ever practiced criminal law, never bothered to learn about the actual practice, and refuses to continue a case when the state hasn't even provided discovery yet.
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So, I am resolved. I will be using the rest of 2024 to bring my career as a PD to a close.
The choice was hard af b/c I still fervently believe in the the work that PubDefs do. But I can't work within the limitations of being employed by the same state I oppose any longer.
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@fodderyfodder
Look, I know objectively this is definitely a dystopian nightmare situation, but I'm kinda jelly I've never fucked up the cops day badly enough that they started surveilling me.
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Here, I fix:
1. Guy is arrested, charged along w/gf for causing death of her baby.
2. DA uses their platform to poison the entire jury pool by sharing their inadmissible speculations w/press.
3. Judge dismisses b/c that is what the law requires, against both defendants.
Colorado legal update:
1. Guy shakes a baby to death
2. DA says mean things about him.
3. Judge dismisses charges because the mean things deprived him of due process.
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My judge just refused to let someone self-report to the jail for his serve time (something we routinely do on misdemeanors so ppl can keep their jobs) because he was a few minutes late for court. Took him into custody immediately and made the point of saying why.
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I do love how everyone is all "Judges can't do that!" as a judge does *exactly that*
We. Have. Been. Trying. To. Tell. You.
The rules are written to benefit them, but when they don't, the ruling class will ignore them.
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The madness you thought you'd get from lawtwitter on verdict day is actually what you're getting today b/c of some bullshit from the YSL trial that hits that sweet spot of 1) niche, 2) a big deal & 3) starring Brian Steel.
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There are not any victims in the vast majority of criminal cases.
And as a victim of both SA and DV, I and many other victims are still abolitionist.
Police don't protect ppl, prisons do not make you safe. There are empirical studies that show they actually make us less safe.
"Abolitionists" plotting to get on juries and purposely not convict people regardless of the evidence
The disrespect to crime victims is despicable
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Dear judges,
You do know the defense attorneys do not have control over either the made or the offers accepted, therefore have no real control over when or how a case is resolved.
Right?
All I can do is be ready for trial if my client and the State can't agree on a deal.
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this is good for her, I'm happy for her
but also FFS
I was first chair on felony trials, year one
like, how is it that both these models exist in the profession?
Working at a firm that allows me to meaningfully participate in a huge civil jury trial is a dream come true. I handled the opening statement, directed 2 key witnesses, crossed the defendant’s wife, and argued motions. Not many 4th year associates can say that.
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Also an option: leaking this early draft so the one that comes out that isn't *quite this awful* is met with relief instead of more outrage that they actually went and overturned Roe.
I clerked at the Supreme Court. Last night, I assumed a liberal clerk leaked the draft opinion overturning Roe. Now I think MUCH more likely it was leaked by a conservative fanatically committed to every word of Alito’s monstrous opinion. **🧵**
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@ask_aubry
I'm... What? My folks specifically told me NOT to call when I was overseas because it was so fucking expensive.
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There is absolutely no way that I have a duty to turn my client in if he's actively dodging a bench warrant but staying in touch with me.
This announcement brought to you by a terribly new judge who should know better.
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If I ever failed up hard enough to be a judge, I would never comment on what anyone was wearing, ever. At least one attorney, probably a PD, will realize I do not care what they wear. Their outfits will grow increasingly bizarre. I will secretly keep a log of all my favorite fits
When I am Chief Justice of the Connecticut Supreme Court and make court rules, I'm gonna make it a rule that lawyers can wear sneakers to court if their shoe game is tight enough. No further guidance will be offered.
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Just so we're all clear about the priorities of the ruling class: I am scheduled for trial today over an alleged shoplifting from Walmart.
Walmart who provides their employees with help applying for state benefits rather than paying a living wage.
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ARE YOU KIDDING ME THERE ARE STILL PEOPLE WHO THINK MANDATORY MINIMUMS IN SENTENCING ACTUALLY EFFECT CRIME RATES?!
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@emiline129
All respect to the people telling you to hang in there, so I'll be the one who says you absolutely do not have to stay for fifty years for the good you've done to matter.
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@GsuGrinding
"Your honor, if that's the only part that disturbs you, I would like to amend my complaint to add some additional issues."
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I really need the pvt attys out there to understand that the PD who's at the bottom of your list of applicants b/c they don't have subject matter experience can LEARN that new subject matter a lot faster than you could teach anyone else how to be as good as a PD in court.
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@RN_Atheist
I have the eating habits of a racoon who lives in the ceiling of a mcdonald's so I have no idea what that is, but good for you!
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@young_litigator
Me: "My client informs me he is not on probation or parole, or out on bond on any other charges."
ADA: "He is, in fact, on both probation and parole and has active bench warrants in four adjacent counties."
My client: I thought you meant just here.
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Officially told my boss that 12/31/24 will be my last day as a PD.
This is still really terrifying and difficult but I'm pushing on.
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Why are teenagers only adults when we want to lock them up, kill them, or make them kill others?
⚠️FYI: Friday, April 19, 2024, marks a pivotal moment in Louisiana's justice system as the "Raise the Age" legislation is reversed. From this day forward, 17-year-olds will be deemed adults in the criminal legal system.
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@TinyWriterLaura
Fr tho. This is how pregnancy looked to me from a very very young age: body horror.
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@BrandonLBradfor
Omfg good for her for just recognizing the amount of emotional labor this man demanded and decided NOPE.
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@defnotadino
Yeah I didn't really know how to react to that as a woman who really just doesn't enjoy cooking.
Hubby also has been no-contact with his mom since long before I met him so.
But if that weren't so and she'd presented me w/a cookbook of his fav recipes I'd have handed it to him.
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I cannot. I simply cannot. We are going to incarcerate a generation of teenagers for totally normal adolescent behavior and we're gonna pretend they're broken but it's us, it's our society that's fucked. Totally fucked.
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This is the same mindset that thinks mandatory minimums work, in case you're wondering why I'm pissed.
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And it should be automatic
Public Service Loan Forgiveness should be five years, not ten.
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The hands-down worst thing about being a PD is when you get a really terrible beating you will 100% of the time have to go right back into court and the very next morning talk to all the people you're extremely angry with.
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This shit right here is why people hate lawyers.
No sane person would make this argument. No one with a grain of humanity left in their soul would write and submit such a horrible legal argument all to protect a massive multinational corporation from a facially legitimate suit.
A doctor died at a Disney Springs restaurant from an allergic reaction after being assured the meal was allergen-free
The widower then sued
Disney is now trying to dismiss the suit — arguing he agreed to arbitrate all disputes when signing up for a Disney+ free trial years
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@lawsforwords
If you're of a "fuck the the state" mentality, yes. If you believe the state's monopoly on violence and it's use of violence against civilians to protect the capitalist status-quo is wrong, it is correct to do all you can to stop it.
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This right here is the real worst part of being a lawyer.
Some lawyers are so absolutely insufferable that I understand why people hate all of us.
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@emiline129
Bowl of Skittles but a chance one of them is poisonous. There's a very small chance any one skittle is the poison skittle, is that good enough reason to throw away the whole bowl? Yes. That's reasonable doubt. You needn't be sure client is NG, but you must be certain he's guilty.
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okay so
what if
what if I STAYED a public defender
but just switched to a lower volume office?
(like, somehow this feels like an even greater betrayal than leaving PD life entirely? what is wrong with my brain, argh)
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Not only am I not required to un-critically believe everything my client tells me, it is usually detrimental to my client's interests for me to do so.
Especially when they think they know the law better than I do.
If my ethical responsibility is to uncritically accept everything a client tells me (it’s not) I’m in the wrong line of work.
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@dalaimo13
He really exemplifies that certain kind of arguably "liberal" judge who nonetheless is trash b/c he cannot wrap his brain around the idea that access to reliable transportation, FOR INSTANCE, is not universal by any stretch of the imagination.
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@AshleySinclair0
@_celia_bedelia_
I'm trying to wrap my brain around the thought process that tells her that all 1400 ppl who liked the tweet actually *have* $10k, instead of living paycheck to paycheck like the vast majority of income earners in the US who exist one bad day away from being homeless themselves.
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I fucking hate listening to judges talk to pro se defendants. Like I understand that pro se defendants make the system slow down (oh the horror!) but they are still people, and they are people who are demonstrably overwhelmed by a system which is designed to be overwhelming.
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I love how every article I read about housing first approaches to addressing homelessness always says two things:
1) It works! According to every time we've done it & every study done on it, it works.
2) But should we really just be giving these yucky homeless people homes?!
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WHEN A JUDGE AND A DA DISCUSS SCHEDULING W/O DEFENSE COUNSEL THAT'S STILL AN EX PARTE COMMUNICATION AND ISN'T ALLOWED.
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This isn't for the PD girlies. Suits are for people with time and money. You get me in a blazer and not-jeans. That's what you get.
Ladies, aside from Anne Taylor or Express, where do yall buy your suits?
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@AngryBlackLady
I am also still picking the bear. My insurance will cover damages done by a bear and I can probably sue someone about it.
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@adhdjesse
I've found this week the thing that's helping my most is the awareness that task *switching* is what tires me the most, not the tasks themselves and giving myself grace to wander aimlessly around the office between tasks.
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Must read thread. MandatoryTIMELY discovery is crucial to due process. Anyone saying these discovery rules are too onerous is telling on themselves.
It is SUPPOSED TO BE HARD TO CONVICT. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE TO WORK FOR IT.
NY prosecutors right now are lobbying to severely limit “discovery reform.” A law simply requiring prosecutors to turn over all evidence to defense or risk dismissal. Their gripe: It’s too much work to collect, copy, & send it all to the defense. Consequences aren’t fair. Really.
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@adhdjesse
Meal subscription services. At least it's cheaper than the door dash and it's time to accept that I just don't like cooking.
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"Why won't they just plead out?"
"Why won't the prosecutor just dismiss it?"
The fact that these aren't considered equally valid considerations is at the root of why our system is irreconcilable with actual justice.
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Basically, I wanna be an even bigger pain in the ass, a more painful thorn in the side of power and I cannot do that with the current resources and limitations of working for the same power I wanna destroy.
I'm writing this for my PD peeps b/c I do feel like I'm letting you down
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@muadib1981
@_celia_bedelia_
Ma'am, it is weird to be this obsessed with what is in a stranger's pants.
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And yet you couldn't clock me for a public defender and said I had NO IDEA what happens in court.
@TehWonderkitty
Oh no! You now have proof that I dedicated my career to prosecuting violent criminals!! 😱 I’m so ashamed of myself!
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@ms_tryl
@MrPits
@BarExamTutor
I absolutely do not review, edit, or get another atty's opinion on anything I prepare for court. I do one draft, hand written from margin to margin, while anxiously making sure I never look away from my paper in any direction, lest anyone think it isn't all my own work.
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@_celia_bedelia_
@ivyprofem
Oh gee, maybe bc they didn't get to play with makeup as toddlers, were never taught anything about its application, weren't encouraged by their peers to experiment w/it as a teen... So IF this is true(&I am not conceding it is), the "why" is: sexism, homophobia and transphobia.
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Pro-tip, don't get your legal news from the fucking NY Post. There's a detailed, informative article from local a Canon City paper and nypost even linked to it!
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I very unquietly lose my shit every time I catch a case where someone was *brought to the hospital* due to a MH crisis and they wound up in jail.
Happens about once a month for me, but I practice near one of the busier hospitals that still has a dedicated MH facility.
nurses who want to inflict carceral violence against patients who were very obviously just experiencing a mental health crisis are among the most vile people on the planet. cops in scrubs!
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I'm like 80% sure that laws just like this were ruled unconstitutional in my lifetime. AZ as I recall, was asking people for "their papers" during Bush2/Obama.
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Being opposed to no-fault divorce is just about the reddest red flag for violent misogyny.
Let me say it again: No-fault Divorce helps ppl from having to PROVE abuse--because it can be very hard to prove a spouse is abusive even when they very much are.
We should want ppl to be able to leave abusive marriages.
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Being a PD only sucks in that it LIMITS the opportunities I have to just bust up at the jail and represent a bunch of protestors at their first appearance hearings.
Like. That'd be so fun. But I'm not supposed to take extra clients on outside those assigned to me. 😡
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I now understand the ominousness of a single bookmark 🧐 on a fucking throwaway tweet
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@colocha_rachel
TY! This articulated thoughts I have been trying to nail down. My husband has been working since he was a *child* until the last few months & I want to throw things at anyone who asks him *when* he's going back to work.
Maybe he won't! And that's okay!
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And they do not tell you this with any expectation that it'll affect you. They'll just casually say "Oh, btw, so-and-so won't be here today because they overdosed and died over the weekend."
Like, nbd, just another human life lost b/c our society is fucked beyond belief.
I had a bailiff tell me today how one of my clients committed suicide.
People think criminal lawyers are tough.
I don’t think people understand how hard it is on us to get that kind of news.
😢
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I love that everyone looks@ *me* b/c there are "too many" cases on the trial calendar.
I am literally the only one who makes zero decisions re: whether this is a trial or not. DAs can dismiss or make a better offer, my client can choose to plead or not. I just act accordingly.
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I call bullshit
I have been goddamn insufferable since the moment I took the LSAT.
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I'm not saying it's good or right but this is why I always recommend hiring local attorneys when you've got legal issues in the backwoods.
Buddy of mine tried a case in a small KY county vs an old time local lawyer. Voir dire, for each juror, went something like this:
Now, you remember when I helped your pappy out of that jam? You could set that aside and give this boy from the big city a fair trial, right?
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I forgot to write a poem today.
I had to attend a sentencing.
My client got sent to prison,
and I had to go back to my office,
and work on the next client's case
in the hope that this time
I can do something more
give something more
carry a little more
surely just
a little
more.
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@AngryBlackLady
I'm only a crim def atty & all, but this is an unlawful seizure in violation of the 4th & Terry v Ohio. Not just terribly conceived but straight up illegal.
This WILL be used as an opportunity to stop ppl for no reason & arrest them for bs & it's probably intended to be.
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@420AttyChicago
I have literally put my hand over my client's mouth before to make him shut up. Stepping on his foot wasn't working and I knew he was about to basically confess- and it was just a bond hearing.
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Related: Still thinking about what lawyer-as-knight-errant would look like and I increasingly like the idea of being the terrifying bitch who can be called in to make the bridge-burning arguments that other attorneys can't tank their careers to make.
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The day you read this case in law school is quite a day, let me tell you.
About 1/3 of students will realize what we think we know about big cases is probably wrong, and the other 2/3 will learn that win or lose, you can always make your opponent look like an asshole.
the day i found out that the coffee was so hot it FUSED HER LABIA TOGETHER requiring reconstructive surgery and triggering constant pain afterwards, AND that she was only suing them for the cost of her medical bills was genuinely a day i lost a lot of faith in the world
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They get sweetheart plea deals from the prosecutors who work with them. They don't go in front of juries mah fren.
people say this and then get jury duty for a cop that beats their wife
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I'm definitely guilty of this but, in my defense, I have >3x the clients of a pvt attorney. Court calendars require me to talk to @ least 10-20 ppl & they all want to talk to me at the same time.
Sometimes I snap @ someone to sit and be quiet b/c I need to hear the judge.
Dude the way some attorneys talk to their clients is startling. "Sit down." "Wait here." "Be quiet."
Where's y'all's manners dang 😳
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I don't think ANYBODY is clocking this for as dire a fucking dystopian trend as it is.
Outbid yet again. They paid $400k over asking in all cash. What’s the fucking point.
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Like... what am I even doing anymore? FR. Someone please explain to me the purpose of my practice if every time the State runs up against a legal barrier THAT WAS PUT IN THEIR WAY FOR A REASON they just pitch a fit and the courts remove the barrier.
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Hi. So. I almost forgot to mention, if substantive due process does so does Gideon.
That ain't a fucking accident either.
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Fwiw, I don't think cops lie more than average. I think everyone lies all the time, mostly to themselves. Cops just have too much power to also be bog-standard liars.
Really rookie fuck in my jury screening got asked if he thought cops lie more than the average person and was like "yeah, obviously."
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Okay so when I told my therapist I'd be open to entertaining any job offers for my post-PD legal career, I didn't actually think I'd have to because I didn't think I'd GET ANY.
Whoops?
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It has literally never upset me to get "fired" as a PD. Like, okay dude. Go pay someone 5k to tell you the same thing I did.
Every client who “fires” you always thinks they’re hurting your feelings when, in reality, most of the time PDs are like THANK THE LORD
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