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@Somms_N
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smallie wey dey mighty
Far away chasing guallala
Joined July 2011
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I saved one chunky piece of meat for when I finally finish my amala.
It was amala 😭🧎🏾♀️
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Someone aborted mission on toasting me at Ebeano today after walking me to my car.
He said I’m his oga and he shouldn’t have tried it. I don’t know how to feel 🥹😂
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Uber from island to mainland can be 3k but the driver will be 30 minutes away.
Bolt for the same distance will now be 13500 but the driver will be inside your house, warming soup for the journey.
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“Hey Siri, Facetime Chisom”
Siri will leave the Chisom I talk to everyday and be calling my JSS 2 bunkmate.
The I in her own AI is for isonu.
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I’m in my apartment yuno. Lmao like my own space.
Pretty fucking empty rn, but I’m soooooo so gassed.
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Ridiculous that a rant video from Yemi Alade has more lyrics than her songs.
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Pretending not to notice sexual cues when you’re chatting with your VERY PLATONIC male friends >>>>>>
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Haven’t been home in 2 days so I naturally expected to find a nomba billboard in my living room
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He announced only one state and stood up like “whew, today drained me”.
Arrest this fraud bro omg. This INEC chairman is the most incompetent person I’ve ever seen in my life.
#NigeriaDecides
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LIL KESH HAD MISSY ELLIOT DOING THE SHOKI WHAT IS YOU PEOPLE'S PROBLEM EH HEADIES?
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Forgot to do my 5 years at the Stack tweet, haha.
Congratulations and well done to me ❤️❤️
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I don't know how laughing at people that Voted Buhari is helping.
Okay you voted Jonathan, do you get a different data plan?
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If I called you cute last night, I meant that shit 🔫
Good morning with your beautiful self 🌹🥺
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Have I outgrown Nutri-C or is it unreasonably difficult to find these days?
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One of my goals in life is to be smelling good up and down (evidenced by the first two birthday presents I opened today).
Happy birthday from me to me 🍻
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The
@ISWISPodcast
episode with Israel the uber driver is still my one of my faves.
Went back to it this morning and if you’re looking for a pick-me-up, this is it oh! You will laugh shege -
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In 2021 I’m embracing my skinny. There’s nothing I haven’t done to gain weight that I don’t even think I need for anything.
I’m not going to disturb myself and nobody should disturb me because I’m also mouthy. Thanks.
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My soap when it sees me coming to wash my hands for the 50th time in one day:
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Not me getting JJK content on tiktok because I’m rewatching JJK. The feds are watching fr
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Me calling all the babes gorgeous this evening, because if you could see the material?!!! 🥺🥺
I am blessed. Girls are so beautiful 🥺
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The feedback from my first 3 months as a manager is so rewarding, I actually might cry.
You’re good at this bro, relaxxxx
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You fit check Chowdeck if you really want to know whether it will rain that day or not
Once you see “delivery delays”, just carry raincoat.
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“Later them go talk say na peer pressure dey make person smoke igbeaux”
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Wallet balance needs to be deductible from the total fee ijmn 🙏🏾
My card should only be charged N500 for a N2500 order, if I already have N2000 in my wallet.
What feature(s) can we implement on the Chowdeck app that would make you say ‘FINALLY’?
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I love cooking for my friends and fam to try. Like it makes me feel so good inside.
I haven’t always known how to cook, so it’s a form of love I’ve only recently learnt to express.
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Only cos this might be my favorite one so far.
Civil Engineering Girls. We all made it!💅
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Venita is there helping him count to one hundred, but she was busy laughing when he was vandalizing Baye's stuff.
It is obscene.
Ike stole people’s coins unprovoked, threw someone’s clothes on toilets floor but he is the victim to Pepper Dem housemates???
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I thought being married meant living with your best friend for the rest of your life but it’s evident you people want to live with bespoke househelp.
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@Iam_mizzytan
The housemates have said that she’s the only one who washes the toilets, and that she volunteered to do it.
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Cuffed someone for a whole day and came back to still ask for food.
Zero fear of poisoning? That’s coocoo crazy
My sister was handcuffed by her ex while he went to work. He returned, uncuffed, demanded her to make food, she asked if he wanted it cooked in a skillet or pan, he chose skillet, then she profusely beat him w/ it. He’s been wheelchair bound since.
Heavy on MAIM THESE NIGGAS.
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Funny how COVID-19 is cancelling everything except the love I had for you.
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Don’t mind me guys, just typing this so that the woman beside me can know that I can SEE her looking into my phone 🙂
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Every time I try to gather my life together, it fails because I try to enter everything at once. I’m now doing things small-small.
Today, we made jollof and cleaned the house. Hopefully, we make it to the gym by 2022 ❤️😂
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I’m the darkest of three siblings and I went to boarding school. Every visiting day for 6 years, I had to deal with my roommates asking me “what happened to you?” Like I was some kind of troll.
My friend asked me over the weekend how i dealt with colorism, and that she’d never seen anyone shrug it off their shoulders as easily as I do. I honestly don’t know. I just think people are.... not very smart. 🤷🏾♀️
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I just heard this adura song by Wande coal last night oh. Now it's all I've been listening to. 😍😍
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Remember we're sending our senior citizens with BCs today!!!!!
Send it to your prayerful aunties and uncles. Since they want you to marry soon, let them know you have to be alive to meet your future husband.
#EndSARS
#EndPoliceBrutality
Here's your draft:
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Can’t wait to be rich so I join y’all to be tweeting “you can’t save/invest your way out of poverty”
Until then, I’m gonna try my luck pliz.
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Bobola knows so much about so many things. How does he do it?
A walking library.
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I love how most of these stories have our great grandmothers leaving their useless husbands for greener pastures. I’ve been chuckling since last night.
Do you know your grandmother's mother's name? Who she was and what she did with her life? Anything about her personality?
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In all this, I’m just happy that my girls are no longer pretending that they have a problem with other babes having the same dresses/clothes as them.
Choose freedom always, my loves ❤️❤️
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Thought I didn’t like So mi so at first but it has grown on me like mad lmao. Wande coal you herbalist.
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The first Paystack hangout we do after this pandemic, I will just be crying hot tears.
I don miss my people
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When next will someone softly lift my chin with their index finger oh lord 🤲🏾🤲🏾
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Bc my friends hyped my improvement.
Sept 2017 - Feb 2018
#ArtOfTheDay
#Drawing
(Just want y’all to know, they’re the same drawing lmaooo)
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Need to ask my body why it thinks I’m a 5:30am girlie?
I work from home sweetie. No need for all this aseju, let me sleep pls.
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Don’t need it bc once I stand up from the couch, I’ve forgotten the movie 😭😭
Your memory is wiped so you can see one movie for the first time again,
What movie are you picking?
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Repete gets all the praise, but this is objectively the best song Blackmagic has ever put out
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Is he your father or an elected official?
This is part of the problem. We’re demanding, not begging.
It is your right.
His Excellency sir
@profosinbajo
we want tangible actions. Daddy, why is the IGP not answering questions by now if you mean business? Anyways, here is an open letter for your kind consideration sir, and just so you know daddy, we are not violent, we are just peacefully protesting
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If Ria Sean has 0 fans, it means I’ve left this world. Love her style so, so much.
Talented babe fr, please listen to her musicccccc
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Never gonna be a bad bitch if I keep saving for a rainy day oh.
Everyday is a rainy day already, might as well look bad asf while at it.
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I remember drinking mimosas yesterday but I could neither confirm nor deny till I saw pictures 🥹🥹
My drink count was off by two mimosas 😅
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