๐am
@Sam_Edwards81
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โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Joined October 2014
As if this Jill woman thinks I tried to run her over on the way to work this morning when I live the other side of the country ๐๐๐
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Where the fucks my free dress then.
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What a fucking joke. Got a skin fade and my mums acting like Iโve just murdered someone ๐๐๐๐๐fuck this family
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I actually hate my life. My mum just found 10 pills in my room and she said wtf are these I said theyโre mints she said take one now then and I just dropped a pill in front of her in my fucking room.
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Seems like a conversation bottom set maths would have in school ๐๐๐๐๐.
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Wearing a face mask in shops etc is compulsory on the 24th of July but why didnโt they do this way back in coronas peak. And why are they starting it 10 days from now ??.
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Canโt believe Iโm wasting whatโs meant to be some of the best years of my life to be grounded by Boris & a 10pm bedtime for another 6 months.
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If youโre one of these people then youโre a fucking tramp
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Very weird fucking behaviour.
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Unpopular opinion but the pubs are actually going to be shit. Too many rules etc is just going to ruin the point of it.
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I fully canโt take Aitch seriously with his trim like this ๐๐ญ
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Dunno what age Iโm gonna stop saluting magpies and refusing to walk over 3 drains.
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Corona has made me realise how dirty touching stuff like cash machines and petrol pumps are. Think how many dirty gremlins have laid their hands on them ๐คง.
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Poor guy actually looks stressed with the amount of screaming 12 year olds in there ๐๐๐๐ bet his heads still ringing.
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Donโt get these people who win like ยฃ25,000 on the radio and theyโre just like โ yeah cheers Andy mate โ donโt sound excited or anything.
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When youโve lost your mate on a night out and youโre trying to text them to see where they are
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Who the fuck has ever called it hippy crack you virgins.
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Still to this day canโt believe some bird ordered a bottle of wine at the Shard and she thought it was a ยฃ50 bottle but turns out it was ยฃ5,000 ๐ญ๐๐ she read it wrong and now has a direct debit going to pay it off. Imagine being that unlucky.
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Throwback to when some people actually believed Big Ben was going to be renamed to โ massive Mohammed โ ๐๐๐๐๐
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Still donโt know how to this day that my mum found pills in my bag and my response was โ itโs a smint โ lool.
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Dunno if Iโm just getting older or something but Snapchat is getting boring.
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In Australia you get fined $20 for not voting and $50 if you donโt vote for the second time. Think this needs to happen in the UK.
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4:45am and Iโve just witnessed someone eating a rustlers burger and drinking a monster on their break at work. Demon.
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Is lockdown even still on ?? Swear everyoneโs back outside like nothings happened ๐ญ.
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Sat behind some lad and heโs texting his girlfriend and after every message heโs putting โ ๐๐๐โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธโ twat.
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Donโt worry I got u. If the NHS gets privatised Iโll be doing runs to the hospital in my car for ยฃ10.
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5 months ago I was sat in my bedroom getting waved on house party, playing them shit quizzes & looking at the walls in my bedroom. Times gone fast.
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On the plus side at least I havenโt heard โ pump it up โ being played in a few weeks.
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Donโt understand them people that havenโt worked in months but can still go out and drink every weekend, run a car & do everything their mates can without a single day of graft lool.
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Few paracetamols and itโll be alive again what the fuck is this.
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Stormzy must be feeling so peak ๐๐๐๐๐๐.
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Opening cards and pretending you havenโt seen the money in it is a sport.
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Iโd actually go mad if that was my mum what the fuck ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ๐๐
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My cat never goes near me and he just came in my room and threw up and then fucked off the fat twat.
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Size of that hot tub fucking hell.
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Probably the left mate seeming as the right one says fucking Leeds at the top.
The old and new of northern transport. Guess which one goes to London
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NYE is on a Friday this year. Canโt wait to see this shit year off for the entire weekend.
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Been working today with this guy and heโs been telling me in depth all the dirty shit he does with his wife. I donโt think heโs aware that Iโm mates with his son ๐ญ๐๐๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ.
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How did I used to be an estate agent? This couple were so excited to move in to their first ever house. They told me to go meet them at their new house with the keys. They werenโt there so I posted them through the letter box. Then they couldnt move in cus they had no keys lool.
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What did you seize ?? A fucking arcade ? ๐๐๐.
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The queue to get into slug and lettuce car park after quarantine is over for girls to take a Snapchat of their pink gins with the caption โ missed my girlies so much โค๏ธ๐ญ๐๐โ
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Them punches like like the ones I have in my dream ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ.
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Nahhh people who do this are the ones who used to bark and growl at people at school. Animals.
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Gonna be decent when lockdowns over but what are we even going to do lool. No clubs or pubs will be open so is everyone just going to be getting pissed on fields like the year 11 days again ๐ญ.
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20 year old Vauxhall Corsa drivers racing to pick the year 10 girls up from school to take them to McDonaldโs on their lunch break
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Just went swimming and I brought a bath mat instead of a towel by accident. What a fucking embarrassment. Whacked it out on the side of the pool and everything.
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Thereโs no way the food from spoons is safe. They could bring a 10 course dinner out in 5 minutes.
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Girls post peng stuff like this after a breakup to piss you off, and it works ngl.
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You know itโs bad when McDonaldโs have cancelled monopoly.
We have made the difficult decision to delay the Monopoly promotion until later in the year until we can be confident that you can win, claim and redeem the prizes available.
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Canโt believe Finn was speaking to this girl from London and theyโd never met. She came on a 7 hour train to meet him and now sheโs moved in with him after a week๐๐ they went back to London to get her shit and came back down and she just ditched her family wtf.
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Dunno why my mums asking what Iโm doing today like Iโm about to go to the pub for a couple of hours then to the gym and then to meet all my mates. Nah Iโm just sitting in my bedroom staring at the wall.
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Swear down my family are tapped. Got asked if I wanted to come downstairs and join the โ Christmas dog party โ safe to say Iโm leaving the house till further notice
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Canโt believe my mum paid for me to go private school for 4 years and Iโm nothing more than a smack head.
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Still one of the jokest scenes from come fly with me ๐๐๐๐๐๐
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As you see we have our first triggered individual named Beth: we can confirm she does drive an Audi A1
The guys all liking this and tweeting this are A class and bmw 1 series twitter.
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If corona virus ruins summer Iโm gonna be pissed off. I donโt stay in the UK for rain and freezing conditions for 8 months for nothing.
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How cruel can you be holding your 5 year old daughter whilst committing suicide ๐คข.
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Canโt be the only one who doesnโt think this looks like blood. ??.
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Do you think fiat 500 twitter will evolve one day and turn into Audi A1 twitter.
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Fiat 500 twitter racing to Aitchโs house to batter his new girlfriend
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Sad to say this but today is the day Iโve blocked the Middle Aged woman named Sarah from Wales. Itโs gotten too much. Sorry Sarah
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Its simple to get on Love Island really, all you need is:. Veneers.A shit accent .To have previously spoken to someone famous.A body count of 50+.An IQ of 1.
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Guy thatโs 27 at my work and when he goes up to Leeds with his missus to see her parents they wonโt let them stay in a room together ๐๐ theyโve been living together for 5 years to. Fuck me.
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