STANLEY SIEVERS
@STANLEY_WS
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biz @stanleyws .com
Los Angeles, CA
Joined September 2009
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imagine having enough energy to get up, get dressed, drive to a grocery store, and knowingly get into an argument with a Trader Joe’s employee because you don’t want to wear a mask for 15 minutes
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somewhere out there, there’s a person who gets chills when the rapping part starts in that evanescence song
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there should be a section of the grocery store where you can just go stand for a while with your cart if you get overstimulated and you’re guaranteed to not be in anyones way
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someone please tell women on TikTok this was a joke and to stop trying to DM me I didn’t realize y’all were actually sick in the head like this
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I’m 31 and just now discovering deftones, how the fuck did this happen
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If you are depressed, try to push through. you will still be depressed but you will also be tired
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proud to announce that I’m the construction worker in this who is excited for them to come
We’re coming. Tour’s coming. Album’s coming. Tom’s coming. Tickets on sale Monday. New song “Edging” out Friday.
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Happy Edge Day
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If I’m walkin by your house and you got the window open watching tv, guess what we’re both watching tv now
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Being a parent is rad because you can just decide things like “during bath time we listen to crowbar” and nobody can stop you
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When I worked at papa johns there was a legendary juggalo on staff. This guy had no teeth, three hatchet man tattoos, pounded faygo (no water), but could make 20 perfect pizza crusts in like 5 minutes. Best shift lead I ever had
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WE’RE TRYING TO MAKE A LITTLE MOVIE ABOUT THE MOSH RETIREMENT GUY. WILL YOU LET US COOK?
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let me fuckin tell you something. if there’s a new jason statham movie out I’m gunna be there. 20 minutes early, no other tickets sold yet, front and center. having the time of my life watching a fellow bald king
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Listen all you early 20s fuckers had it easy getting into hardcore. Do you know how hard it was for me to find terror from starting with my first cds I ever bought being the Baha men and Eiffel 65. You just type google dot com hardcore
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Guys will literally become a girl dad and say “hell yeah” (it’s me I’m guys and just became a girl dad - hell yeah)
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Oppenheimer finding out jojo is working on an f bomb
Jojo Siwa reveals that she isn’t that innocent after all:
“Just wait until I drop that F bomb,” she warns
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this mobile deposit shit is easy as hell. just deposited this same bill 400 times and now I’m gunna go to benihana
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fuckin weaklings at the airport waiting in line for their starbucks. eat an Italian sub at 7am like a real man
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Guys will literally have a great time on their first Father’s Day and say hell yeah
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I’m 31 and just now discovering Creed, how the fuck did this happen
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When I’m in the gym playing air guitar between sets, people constantly approach me asking what song it is because it looks so incredible
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I spent a year filling in for a straight edge christian hardcore band when I am neither, and every night when kids would ask them to “talk about their faith” they’d say “our bass player would love to do that” and send em to me. It was hilarious
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@JordanUhl
walking around a friend's funeral and telling everyone how the deceased believed I should be a male model
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actually me to one of the 20 photographers at the show last night
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twitter be like - you have never liked a single tweet from a far right personality. we’re gunna make sure that’s all you see.
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thanks to the mosh retirement shirts, I was able to donate $1473.81 to
@AbortionFunds
, which is pretty cool!
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Apple exposed as working with the deep state - wow insane
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whenever I see someone in public eating a big ass sandwich, I just wanna walk over to em and say “you’re fuckin killing it right now”
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people always get pissed when I bust out my Chilis Triple Dipper on the plane. but they change their tune reeeaaalllll quick when I start dolin out loaded potato skins to everyone in my row 😏
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@JasonKPargin
There’s no way he- welp he did it again. Used his extremely large and muscular body to win the day
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GUY ACCIDENTALLY BUYS TICKETS TO WRONG CIRQUE DU SOLEIL
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Reading a Tom Clancy novel and every few pages, saying “fuck yes let’s get these fuckers” out loud
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guess what?!? I LIKE seeing peoples Spotify wrapped. yeah I’m a fucked up freak. im actually interested. I wanna see what weird shit you listened to. I wanna see it all. mainline it straight to my veins.
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THE MOSHUMENTARY IS OUT NOW. LINK IN BIO IF UR NOT A WIMP ASS POSER
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If the beatdown band shows up with a nerd wearing glasses on guitar you know the riffs are gunna be evil as fuck
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I’m 31 and just now discovering blink 182, how the fuck did this happen
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