S🏄🏽 @SHH0V0 profile

S🏄🏽

@SHH0V0

Followers

3,460

Following

2,337

Media

2,159

Statuses

22,225

self hate advocate || 24

https://t.co/2Q0Dfaxp0q

Manchester, England

Joined October 2018

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@taycarpnter

@democracy_yay

@kyoukai_no_hito

@Hendmagdii

@PizzaBolis

Pinned Tweet

S🏄🏽

@SHH0V0

4 years

Doctor: Don’t worry the X-ray machine is completely safe Doctors whilst you’re getting the X-ray:

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4 years

When you bark because you sense danger but your owner just shouts ‘SHUT THE FUCK UP’ so loud the neighbors hear it

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4 years

How serial killers who never got caught watch documentaries about their crimes

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4 years

me forgetting all my problems when I’m with my friends

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4 years

Damn looks like I’m kinda busy tonight 😅

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5 years

‘Last one to the cars a rotten egg’ 8 year old me:

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5 years

When the 9am lecturer decides to make a quick joke.

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4 years

When you accidentally pull a push door in a public place

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5 years

Not a phone in site, literally just vibes.

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5 years

Phillip Schofield when his wife and daughters went to sleep

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2 years

I thought this was someone's organs

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5 years

Dajjal after his ‘End of World Plan’ gets exposed by a shitty Netflix original.

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4 years

Johnson's baby powder is like dior sauvage for babies

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4 years

I’m a waffler so if the convo doesn’t flow that’s a you problem still 🤝

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5 years

Snitch cousin: how come you’ve blocked me on everything? Me:

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5 years

Virgin for life so I can set an example for my kids 🤝

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5 years

‘Your new password can not be one you’ve previously used’

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5 years

Me looking at the menu knowing damn well I’m ordering the usual.

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5 years

Just remembered I’m still a university student with deadlines 😔

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5 years

Her content makes sense now, they probably accidentally took out too much brain.

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5 years

Footlocker employees when they couldn’t sell you insoles or socks

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5 years

Reading old messages from an ex that say ‘I love you’ and ‘I’ll never leave you’

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5 years

SUGAR IN THE MORNING DING DING

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4 years

inna lillahi wa inna illayhi raji'oon my motivation for uni has died

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5 years

‘Unfortunately your application did not get chosen, we hope you succeed next tim.....’

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4 years

Month of Ramadan but some shaytan aren’t locked up kmt 😭😭

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4 years

Waiting on that ‘Eid Mubarak’ text from someone I don’t speak to all year

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5 years

Younger me enjoying life not knowing what’s to come 😔

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5 years

When someone remembers the little things you tell them

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5 years

On a level tho, men’s mental health isn’t taken seriously enough.

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5 years

Sex is very intimate and sacred act. Your body is a temple and should not be shared with someone who supports Manchester United.

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5 years

Me after trying to make plans in a gc and nobody replies

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5 years

Oh so you like phones??? Then give me your number

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5 years

When you’re lurking and get your feelings hurt

Michael Scofield 🅙

@geuleedange

5 years

Bomboclaat

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5 years

Younger cousins: ahhh man you’re in uni??? I bet it’s so fun Me:

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5 years

5 year olds after hearing baby shark play for the 56,740th time:

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4 years

Bitches be like “how’d you know I have an iron deficiency”

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4 years

Calling some babies ugly should be normalised, I’m tired of lying

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5 years

@ovosanaa @tarsinamhar A piece of his soul dies with every pull 😂.

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4 years

When you break a girls heart in secondary and walk past her and her friends look at you like this

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5 years

Imagine someone using everything you told them against you LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOthatshithurtedOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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4 years

You ever quit a job application half way through cos they're asking too much?? 😭

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4 years

Me staring at a random spot in my room, trying to trick the ghost into thinking I can see it

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4 years

Your alarm sound is technically your theme song because it plays at the start of every “episode”

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5 years

Me looking at my mum whilst guests are over so she knows I’m hungry.

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4 years

How I’m built vs how my girls built

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4 years

When I say ‘the other day’ I mean any time between today and the day I was born

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5 years

Waiting for a JD employee to come back to you after they’ve gone to check a product

My Deen My Swag 💫

@AM_Saleeeem

5 years

Bomboclaat: 😂

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2 years

Be safe in this windy weather my short kings 🫶🏽

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4 years

I'm not a morning person, I need time to defrost before you talk to me

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5 years

My sibling: ha ha you just got in trouble. Me:

📹📂

@rinashaze

5 years

boomclaat

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5 years

When you buss a joke in the gc and see all the ‘😂😂😂’ and ‘💀💀💀’ roll in.

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5 years

Just found out I have to speak to a girl to actually get a gf.

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5 years

‘Why tf is papa johns messaging you at 4am?!?’

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4 years

What I learnt What I learnt In school Vs of Twitter

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4 years

That wave of sadness that just hits you out of nowhere ain’t it :(

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4 years

Woke up to another day of not being rich 😔

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4 years

It’s been ‘one of those nights’ for a few night now

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4 years

Shout to the people that check up on you when you’ve been absent

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4 years

When you’re living your best life and see ‘10 missed calls from Mum’

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5 years

Me watching my girl do her makeup on ft with me

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4 years

Me closing the fridge slowly to see if the light stays on

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5 years

How girls think they look in face masks vs how they really look.

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1 year

Me everytime I see her like another man's tweet

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5 years

I’m in the mood to go parachuting, but without the parachute.

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5 years

Wha-

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5 years

Wearing the finest fit on non uniform day and find out your crush called in sick

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5 years

When I ask my mum where something is and she finds it first time

سناء🕊

@sxna_xo

5 years

bomboclaat

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5 years

Stranger on a public transport: Alright but your mum didn’t complain when she ate my ass Me pausing my music to hear more:

mg 🇨🇬 / wemby szn

@marvingrt12

5 years

Bomboclaat

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4 years

Me after hitting send on a risky message

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5 years

If he links you in this tracksuit he doesn’t rate his life or yours.

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5 years

My mum deciding wether to smoke me on the spot or wait till we get home

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5 years

Does anyone else feel like life’s just become a cycle of the same shit.

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4 years

Ever just sit and think ‘damn I’m really alive and vibin huh’

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4 years

I’m not anti social, I just don’t waste energy on people that don’t deserve it

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4 years

‘I’ll call you back later’ ~ Biggest lie ever told

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4 years

Mentally I’m here 😔

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4 years

Babies will shout ‘sakjshdb’ and the mum will say ‘ahhh he’s hungry’

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5 years

9 yr old me: Wait... aren’t you fasting today!? My older sister:

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4 years

Me ending my primary school creative writing essay with “it was all a dream.”

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4 years

Kid: dad can I see some of your memories from 2020? Me:

out of context alpacas

@contextalpacas

4 years

Bomboclaat

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5 years

‘How much have you cried since starting uni?’

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4 years

Need for Speed : Toddler drift

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5 years

Walking into lecture hall and seeing a guest lecturer

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5 years

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4 years

When someone out of your league likes you, but you’re not complaining because at least you getting a chance

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4 years

Some people aren’t really your friend, they’re just scared to be your enemy

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4 years

Finishing a shower and realising you forgot to bring a towel in with you

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5 years

Me playing sad music cause I’m low key depressed: My friend: is this guy fuckin depressed or something 😂. Me:

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4 years

‘Catch flights not feelings’ was meant to be the mood this year 😭😭

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4 years

When your hometown mates meet your university mates for a motive

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4 years

Don’t make someone a priority when you’re not even an option 🤝

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4 years

Be nice to people around you, you never know what they're going through 🤝

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4 years

Disappearing from people’s lives is my favourite flex 🤝

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4 years

When you poop in someone's house and it wont flush

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5 years

Why aren’t babies born 9 months old?

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4 years

Nobody: The shampoo bottle at 3am:

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4 years

‘You said Allahu Akbar FAM!’

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4 years

Me searching for my non existent homework when the teachers asks for it

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