Rose Ruane
@RegretteRuane
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Writer. Artist. Sweetheart. Battleaxe. She/Her. This is Yesterday & Birding from @CorsairBooks PhD @UofGWriting
Glasgow, Scotland
Joined October 2020
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Here’s the final cover for Birding: my chilly seaside book about the messiness of memory & blurry boundaries between responsibility & obligation, as women trapped & tangled in their pasts try to get free & take flight.
Out May 2nd from
@CorsairBooks
available for pre-order now🍦
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Quitting Duolingo because I have the only phrase I need now
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Man just barrelled down this train carriage on his phone having a heated conversation.
The last snippet I heard was “don’t you treat me like I’ve got four arses Paul,” AND I NEED TO KNOW WHAT IT MEANS???
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Petition to turn all remaining phone boxes into soundproof screaming cupboards where you can pop in for a quick, refreshing, little howl of despair.
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@JasonHazeley
Oh that is *wonderful.*
Pre-Twitter I heard the tantalising snippet “you know how I feel about Standard Poodles, let’s not have another Dunstable, shall we,” and in that moment I felt as if I simultaneously understood everything & nothing at all about those people.
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@TheCulljoy
Either nothing or nothing good I’ll bet. I once walked past a pair of really quite senior, glamorous ladies having a row and one shouted at the other “I’ll make your bed in hell Margaret,” and I still think of them from time to time.
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My gran referred to Asda as Associated Dairies until the day she died & she was most certainly just doing it to be annoying.
So I will carry the flame forward, doggedly calling this place Twitter for the sole purpose of being a prick, in the noble tradition of my foremothers.
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Do you like partially constructed bridges?
Do you like repetitive, indeterminate photos of concrete being poured?
Do you like small sections of motorway that don’t go anywhere yet?
If the answer’s yes, this is the thread for you: it’s slides of the M25 under construction time!
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Loves, I am simply disgusted to announce that I’ve found the pomodoro method really works for me & it’s even more of a horrifying betrayal than when I discovered that exercise makes me feel better.
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Bought this baffling beauty of a Mike Bell illustration in an auction & I’m in love❤️
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Do not advertise me your “tummy control” swimsuits; my tummy will not be controlled, it will crush buildings like Godzilla on the rampage & envelop nearby objects in its feral rolls if it wants
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Please, I want to descend these steps in a hail of Sobrani smoke, holding something pink & lethal in a martini glass, wearing a hostess dress with sleeves big enough to shelter a Shetland pony & make an acidic toast that turns tearful & ends in screaming at my guests to get out
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Mum controversially declaring that she “can’t see the point in looking at stars” because “there’s a lot more going on with fungus & you don’t have to bother with the dark.”
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@JNRaeside
The not-that-famous poet who kept me waiting outside for ages, who then, after his dog squatted & shat on the floor in front of me, left the stinking dog egg there and sat smirking at my attempts to carry on the interview while retching. IN HIS OWN FLAT. So extra weird flex.
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Roses are red
Cocktails are boozes
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My childhood led me to believe that brass rubbing was going to be a much bigger deal than it has turned out to be.
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The horse
He destroyed his stable
Yes
YES
The horse is out
Hands up who's already written a poem about The Horses, then.
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When I was a little kid, the most hard as fuck, totally metal as actual Satan thing I could imagine, was getting a tattoo that said Bloody Hell & so I thought, at almost 47 years old it was finally time.
Truly, you’re never too old to make your childhood dreams come true😻💘
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Quite a lot of work, isn’t it? Trying not to get enormously, profoundly depressed by all the enormously, profoundly depressing shit.
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A tiny little girl in the chemist looked me over from head to heel & back again & said to her mum “that lady has big boobies but she is dressed like a baby.”
And wow, shots fired, I have been *read* today.
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Having cats is like running a hotel for guests who want to speak to the manager all the time.
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Absolutely fuck this fucking Jive Bunny Megamix weather.
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Outside my flat a small child is inconsolably roaring “I don’t want today, I hate today” & five stars, exactly this, go off, voice of a generation etc.
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The sad moment when a favourite bra turns inexplicably evil & starts being uncomfortable.
Like a best friend suddenly turning against you.
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Really wearing one of my most nonsense dresses to go out for a sweet little fuck about.
Once again dressing for the job I want: Barbara Cartland plays Big Bird.
Careers advisor never mentioned it as an option but lipstick up & shoot for the moon I reckon💛
Oh, I am finally testing negative for Covid & feeling flighty-bright as a very new, sweet little pony & really, I can’t wait to get dressed up like a proper silly sausage & snog every available corner of outdoors tomorrow.
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At youth club, a boy who had a crush on me bent over & ripped out a huge fart to show me how it made his Global Hypercolour shorts change colour round the arsehole & was genuinely shocked I wasn’t hopelessly smitten.
And that’s the vibe I get from your man who runs this place.
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Quite a fuck offy little day, really a very unappealing effort of a Tuesday, extremely unchic & shapeless with a small, stupid hat on at an irritating angle
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@sophiescott
@BookwormVaught
Shut the whole app down, we are all as educated as we need to be💕
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Small child in the airport just asked me if I’m going “home” to Disneyland & this is the kind of compliment I’m here for.
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Trans & non-binary friends I hope you can hear the voices telling you that you are loved & valued, necessary & cherished, today & always.
The world is infinitely better & more beautiful because you are in it.
Sending love to all.
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Absolutely appalling, deeply disappointing treatment of a passionate, tireless advocate of books & authors.
And all caused by hateful bigots who hypocritically claim to be concerned with free speech.
Any bookshop would be extremely fortunate to have Tilly
Hey
#BookTwitter
. I think you hopefully all know I generally try to keep this a positive space, but I can’t really put a positive spin on how I feel right now.
My heart is broken, and I’m so disappointed in a company who won’t forgive a single mistake like this.
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One of the greatest privileges of going round looking like a proper silly sausage is the way children respond & today a little girl did a full on spit take with her Fruit Shoot & shouted “mummy! Look at that old fairy lady,” & it really tickled me right in the ventricles💘
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Your oul nana is off to Edinburgh dressed as a silly little cake.
First & last day out in a while as I’m getting a cheeky, little, naughty little operation next week which will hopefully make jaunts like this less scarce.
Buttered in factor 50, full of iced coffee & optimism💖
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Roses are red
Absinthe is green
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I’m just a girl, standing in front of a void, asking it to consume me.
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Birding is here loves!
Cover reveal coming soon but in the meantime there she is looking lovely under London sky.
My chilly seaside book about the messiness of memory, being trapped & tangled in the past while trying to get free & take flight is out in May from
@CorsairBooks
🍦🪽
BIRDING by Rose Ruane
@RegretteRuane
(02/05)🍦🕊️
Thrilled by the arrival of these minty fresh, beautiful proofs, making me dream of salty seasides from a crisp winter Monday. I love-love this witty, lyrical, angry, empowering, nostalgic novel. Bloggers, lmk if you want to read!
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So my wanks and winter swims are inappropriate and smug but apparently it’s cute and funny when a walrus does it?😡
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@Andr6wMale
This postcard inside a 1913 copy of the medical textbook An Index of Treatment, between the pages bearing anatomical diagrams of the human heart.
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If anyone gave me this I would make them eat it like a biscuit in front of me
I get the feeling this might not be the best thing to get a menopausal woman!
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Last night I dreamt I got a tattoo of Sylvia Plath with a speech bubble saying “Yas bitch, fuckin’ bees” & I fear I’m just the sort of insufferable wank to make that a real thing one day
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Outfits for women over forty*
*and for people of all ages and genders who might enjoy wearing this kind of fancy nonsense
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Absolutely agonising scenes as I unbox my own copies.
Beautiful book, otherwise disgusting stuff loves🍦
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RIP the truly great Edna O’Brien🖤
Let us pause for a moment to appreciate one of the greatest author photos ever taken: Edna O’Brien photographed by Bruce Weber.
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One of life’s tiny, stupid pleasures is announcing the cat’s arrival into the room in the style of George Michael welcoming Elton John to the stage to duet on Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me at Live Aid.
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Most curséd acquisition. Edwardian baby’s rattle with unutterably shrill inbuilt whistle.
Blew it.
Awaiting a ghastly fate.
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Edna O’Brien is here to contest that.
This is the greatest author photo of all time. Yes?
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After 20 years of incredible, tireless efforts to secure the future of work created in the art therapy studio at Netherne hospital by individuals compelled to live there,
@ACTchair
is
stepping down.
Delighted to build on his great work as new chair of The Adamson Collection Trust
Changes at Adamson Collection Trust.
Writer & artist Rose Ruane is now Chair.
I've handed over after 20 years in post.
@RegretteRuane
@RawVisionMag
@baat_org
@ExploreWellcome
@Bethlem_Gallery
Adamson Collection summary -by December 2024. All about:
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Wicked Game by Chris Isaak always reminds me of a boy at youth club whose (failed) seduction attempt was lip syncing along while making eye contact. When that failed he said watch this, bent over & showed me that his Global Hypercolour shorts changed colour when he farted.
#totp
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I’m not saying I have a lot of anxieties about my PhD but I am saying I dreamed I got thrown out of the Wellcome library for drawing a massive pair of boobs on the table in the rare materials room and that I was naked when it happened.
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Realising I have basically dressed as a whole episode of TV-am today
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Had an amazing dream last night that Danny Dyer was running the pain management clinic & he told me that “the first thing you’ve got to remember is that chronic pain is fucking slag.”
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7:15 pure doom, homework heartbreak, school night sensation of the soul
7:45 horny AF
8:40 pure doom reprise, crying at the theme tune, realising in some unbearably real but nameless way that everyone you’ve ever loved will one day die
9:10 paralysing nuclear dread
9:25 bath/bed
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I often remember this photo that one of my dearest people took of me & think about the fact she captured my ideal form which is a blur of tulle in the half dark
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Finally got new author photos to go with my funny sad seaside book about middle age, Me Too, getting trapped & trying to take flight, featuring one Mary Oliver joke & some really bad sex in a model village🍦
Birding by
@regretteruane
follows two women, untangling the damaging details of their past in the hope for a better future.
Out May 2nd.
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I’m walking along, minding my own business, when a crane hoists me up into the air, blaring Margarita Time with the lyrics changed to include my name & what a sweet, naughty little baby I am.
My cat hands the crane driver a wad of fifties & asks me how the fuck I like that shit.
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Loves, yer oul nana has finally finished redrafting Birding, my book two.
One huge loss, one cancer scare, fuck knows how many coffees & cries.
Sometimes it felt exhilarating.
Sometimes it felt absolutely dogshit.
At times, it felt impossible.
But it was not & now it’s done❤️🩹
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I am so very pleased with the Rainbow Brite dress I got for my birthday.
Really, one of my favourite parts of adulthood is dressing like a big creepy toddler in all the things I actually wanted back when I was one, rather than the shades of dog’s egg & condiment my mum favoured.
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Forget cheese and pineapple hedgehog, every party needs an edible Krampus.
Especially knowing how much children love prunes.
Maybe one for
@folk_horror
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I regret to inform my middle-aged body that we are going out on a Monday & I also regret to inform my already over processed hair that crimping is back.
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If you like having a table seat all to yourself for an entire train journey, may I recommend crying unstoppably in complete silence the whole way.
I was a bit shocked but it felt long overdue, like catching up on admin. Sadmin.
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When I was young, Derek Jarman’s films were life rafts, portals & escape hatches. A place to be at home with what I then found strange & inexplicable in myself.
As numinous an experience as I’ve had to see Prospect Cottage today under broad skies & molten sunset.
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Took this earlier before I went out & basically I have realised that my entire adult dress sense is founded on party outfits I wanted as a child when my mother insisted on dressing me in jobby brown velour instead.
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Was nice to see pictures of me laughing as things have been sad & sickly & shit recently.
Felt dismayingly fucked after getting gussied up to go out & after a short but lovely lunch I’m flattened & lead-limbed. Happy to have managed to go out at all though at this stage.
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There is no eating experience more demeaning than the little warming wank required to start coaxing a Calippo out of the tube.
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Glasgow being ridiculously overeager with the first whispers & shivers of autumn. It’s August the fucking first mate, calm down with that almost imperceptible yet definite thinning and dimming of the light shit.
Swear it’s a conspiracy to start selling soup and cardigans.
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Had an amazing dream that there was a lost & rediscovered Miss Marple episode where she broke up an illegal wanking cartel.
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Plive Plath Plove
Love life day by day, color by color, touch by touch.
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@elinorcleghorn
Yes! And also, should I be worried that in my unawareness of it, I’ve inadvertently been going round treating people as if they’ve got four arses this whole time?
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This, all the way. I’m a middle-aged, queer, cis woman with nothing but unconditional love & solidarity for trans people, now & always.
Our rights are inextricably connected & even if they weren’t, I’d still feel this way.
Trans rights are human rights.
No debate with fascists.
I know it can be scary to speak out for trans rights given the political climate. But if you're a cis woman who supports trans rights, now is the time to do it. We cannot allow ourselves to be used as the excuse to hurt our trans friends, colleagues and neighbours any longer.
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At the loneliest, most confusing point in my life, late night films I regularly found on Channel 4 provided so much clarity & company.
Encounters with an elsewhere & an afterwards that I needed to see but hadn’t quite been able to imagine before. A heartfelt thank fuck for them.
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Thank you so very much for all the utterly appreciated generous support for me & Birding.
I’m deeply glad & grateful for all the kind messages, book buying & lovely people coming to events.
Vast thanks to dearest
@zoestrachan
for being a wonderful chair at last night’s launch🩷
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So overjoyed with my new Bagpuss by way of Louis Wain by amazing Caitlin at Lucky in Love🩷💕
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Reprehensible, hateful bigotry. Completely vile & embarrassing.
Sending love & solidarity to trans & GNC comrades today & always.
A publishing network for those “concerned about the impact of gender ideology on our sector and wider society” launched today for publishing professionals, authors and creatives 👇
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There’s a toddler on this bus repeatedly pointing at thin air & exclaiming “there’s Geoffrey, it’s Geoffrey, hi Geoffrey!” and I’m quite thrilled by the possibility that the number 38 is haunted.
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30 to 40 more years of long, elaborate wanks, drinking hot sauce out the bottle in bed & dressing cats in bonnets and bootees uninterrupted?
Don’t threaten me with a good time.
Millennials who are very cavalier about not having children are in for a shock when they enter their 40s & realize life is only half over. What do you do at that point? Keep trying to be sexy & have fun? I expect to see a lot of sadness & confusion about what to do at that point.
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Reached the bit of Sunday which feels about as fun-filled, high energy & inviting as this 1970s slide of two distant relatives.
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“You can do this,” I tell myself.
“It’s not preposterous that you’re giving a conference paper, you’re not a vast daft wally who farces the fuck out of everything you touch,” I affirm, as I stand in my pants sawing a snarled bobble out of my hair with a kitchen knife.
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Birding is out tomorrow, please join me to launch it into the world at Waterstones Sauchiehall Street tomorrow evening💚🍦💕
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I want to bite the forbidden Jammie Dodger
Oval Gold Locket Set with a Red Cabochon Heart. Given to Princess Mary of Teck (1867-1953) by Queen Victoria when a child at Osborne House. Collection: Royal Collection Trust archive.
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Today has been a perfect vile little monster but I have absolute faith in the power of camp & kitsch & sleeves we can sail away in.
Let’s tear ourselves a hole in time, disappear into neon drenched 60s Soho & be chic, bleak & witty about the heaviness of our hearts.
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Clearing my studio to move out after fifteen years.
Started sad, now enjoying the curious catharsis of binning old work, piles of notebooks & unrealised half-creations.
In the process found a photo of my extremely cool, legend, fact goblin child-self on the school quiz team.
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Loves, I’m increasingly not here. A combination of being unable to expose myself to the abuse discourse & the fact it feels increasingly broken & unsafe. I’m sure as fuck not giving that fascist a penny to stay if he starts charging.
I’m on 🩵☁️ & Insta with the same handle💖✨💕
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