Patrick Star
@PatrickLaugh
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I'm SpongeBob's best friend and neighbor. I am portrayed as fat, lazy, and generally ignorant and my intelligence is generally low.
Houston
Joined June 2011
"Just move on and be happy!!" oh wow :) you're so clever :) I didn't think of that :) such a good idea :) thank you very much
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when girls call their boyfriend “daddy” i want to projectile vomit on their existence
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No, I haven't met Mr. Right yet. But I have met Mr. Dumb, Mr. Know It All, and Mr. Who Doesn't Give A Fuck.
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last day of school: other people: OMG im gonna miss all of you so much :') me: adios bitchachos
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Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia = Fear of long words.
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No Microsoft Word, I did not spell my last name wrong. You're just dumb.
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I am not getting out of this bed, it is warm and it loves me.
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"Truth or dare?" "DARE!" "I dare you to________" "Never mind... Truth"
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I'm so clever that sometimes, even I can't figure out what I'm doing.
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The best thing about drinking a bunch of water before bed is, fucking nothing you have to get up out of bed to pee every 10 seconds.
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They said SLEEP is good for the brain, why is it not allowed in SCHOOL?
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There should be a Victoria's Secret for guys called Victor's Secret and Zac Efron should be an angel.
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Me: buys thing online............. Me 3 hours later: Okay where is it
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thigh gap thigh ga thigh g thigh thig thi th thr thre three three slices of pizza
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I think I'm gonna take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower but with me in it...
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