Nicola Davidson 🏳️🌈 🇳🇿
@NicolaMDavidson
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USA Today bestselling author of erotic/kinky historical romance. Dessertaholic. Bi. Taurus. She/her. Fbook: Nicola Davidson - Author. Insta: nicoladauthor
New Zealand
Joined May 2012
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IT'S HERE!!
So thrilled to bring you Alaric and Evaine's story with English + Welsh history, Greek mythology, court intrigue, amusing sidekicks, lashings of hot sex (desk! wagon! tower!) and swoony romance.
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Sometimes I get SO frustrated with the dismissal of online friendships or found family.
Hands up if at some stage a random onliner has:
accepted you
comforted/supported you
made you laugh
lifted you up/cheered for you
1000% more than anyone in real life.
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@ask_aubry
Even worse than this, you just know these men don't give a shit about the birth rate. They just want to SA + R with no repercussions.
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Beloved fledgling writers, a wee PSA:
- No, you don't need to delete all the adverbs & adjectives.
- No, writers don't have to write every day.
- No, you don't have to plot the book before you start.
- Yes, tell your story in your voice.
- Yes, you got this.
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People about romance misunderstandings: gah, if they'd just had a CONVERSATION. Not hard!
People in RL: I would rather chew off my own arm than talk about this.
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Actually historically inaccurate:
- wills insisting a duke loses his title if unmarried
- illegitimate sons inheriting titles
- kilts in medieval Scotland.
Not historically inaccurate:
- POC
- queer folk
- sex slang and kink
- women fighting for social change.
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@ask_aubry
I hate the fact that so many posts are a woman describing something truly sadistically evil...only to finish with 'am I being overdramatic'
No, honey. Anyone who mentally tortures you to physical illness is a bad person.
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The joys of having both depression and an anxiety disorder:
Depression: Doing anything is so hard right now.
Anxiety: You're not doing anything! Do something! All the bad things will happen! The worst things! No, you may not sleep. Or stay still. You'll never succeed!
D: Too hard
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@redditships
Sure as the sun rises and sets, a woman on Reddit will describe an utterly fucked up situation then conclude with 'am I overreacting?'.
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Dear publishing world:
Stop perpetuating this bullshit that writers write every day. The job is not a prison sentence. Writers write as much as they can, when they can. And they embrace LIVING to enrich their work.
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History truth: women ruled empires, led armies, made important advancements in science, mathematics, medicine, invented things, wrote books, protested, broke rules, loved women, enjoyed kink etc etc ETC.
In NO ERA did they all sit quietly and sew.
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@ask_aubry
The fact that he systematically destroys her stuff and won't buy her something as simple as deodorant are two massive red flags.
This man loves controlling her and I wouldn't be surprised if he is somehow sabotaging her job hunt.
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@ask_aubry
They need another line where creepy old guy says 'oh, and from now on we're going to be tracking your cycle.'
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I just read the euphemism 'her tight cocoon' in a historical romance and I am not ok.
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Check out this unicorn who is kind, matter of fact, knowledgeable, and shows how to build up to full push ups in a way that makes actual sense.
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Dear Alexa,
Cats sense evil and deal with it as they see fit.
Love,
Everyone
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Darlings.
I'll generously hope you just don't know, but when you buy a Zon book, read, and return - the author has the royalty deducted from their account. At no point does Zon absorb that.
This shitty new tiktok trend only hurts authors. Don't demand more then take away income.
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@redditships
Gf trying to isolate you from family members in favour of her religious beliefs is culty, not quirky. Your sis is 14. You need to look out for her cos this is messed up.
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Hands up if the respite and hope and HEA of romance novels are a key reason you're able to keep fighting the good fight in real life.
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If you prefer romances with no/low steam, that is totally fine, you do you. Now extend the same courtesy to those who prefer romances with lots of steam.
Shaming via heat level is such bullshit. Just let people read what they enjoy without the snark.
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@AlyssaWees
The way OP refuses to acknowledge major aspects like funding, liability, staffing shortages, laws/bylaws in different countries is just wild. Libraries should not try to be all things to all people. And they are not childcare centres for young kids.
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@LissaBryan
@ask_aubry
Lol, the way we absolutely guarantee that 'excitement' is NOT the emotion.
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Instead of best book lists, how about we just say a million thank yous to all the authors who rolled up their sleeves in the worst possible environment for creativity and wrote the stories that kept us going.
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@ask_aubry
You just don't understand, guys. Kayla's AMAZING! Like an awesome person who habitually cheats and has OP lie to her partners. All they did was hook up at his gf's birthday, I mean come on, now.
(Did he mention Kayla is AMAZING???)
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If 'spicy tiktok' read an actual erotic romance their heads would explode. Can't believe the books that are being touted as sooooooooo hottttttttttt.
Meh.
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@ask_aubry
Can we talk about the transactional grossness of doing dishes or tidying once...not to keep the household ticking over, but wanting sex reward. Yuck.
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Misogynistic fuckery that authors need to CUT OUT:
- birth control = slutty
- sexual past = slutty
- 'hero' who says or thinks 'all the girls I slept with previously were gross/easy - not like you!'
- childless women don't know how to love
- HEA can only be marriage + babies
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@ask_aubry
That meet cute tale had kind of a happy ending: two utterly gross people took each other off the market?? (The fiancee had a lucky escape, hope she is blissfully happy somewhere.)
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Dearest readers: if you love a book, for the love of vodka, gushing about it on Twitter/FB/GR/BB/retailers is an incredibly kind thing you can do for an author. Especially cos the people who hate it will never be shy in shouting their loathing and telling us how trash we are.
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@redditships
So what you're saying is fake relationship + forced proximity + queer + gruff/sunshine + FEELS.
You might have warned my poor heart this would be so TROPETASTIC and PERFECT.
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@ask_aubry
So lemme get this straight: she is exhausted from her job and recovering from an illness that really knocks a body about, and he still expected her to cook until she asked? And then he got her a freebie that she's allergic to? LOL. Enjoy singledom, dude.
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Erotic fiction 2010: billionaire handcuffs you.
Erotic fiction 2021: billionaire taken away in handcuffs.
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@ask_aubry
That whole thread is hands down one of the most disturbing things I've ever read. That dude is cosplaying humanity and not even keeping track of his own lies.
His wife has every reason to fear for herself and the kid (who needs SERIOUS intervention asap)
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@ask_aubry
His gf literally got hot coffee spilled over her and all he can think about is his delicate sensibilities being offended?
Nah, get in the bin, dude.
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Can we please burn with fire the notion that erotic romance authors write 'porn'.
It is especially galling when romance authors who write chaste or mild heat books say this. Please don't. It's rude, fucking insulting and 100% wrong.
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@ask_aubry
Incel "doms" are by far the worst sub species. They understand nothing about the foundations of kink: consent, trust, boundaries etc.
This is very much a creepy religious fundamental fetish of master and servant.
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@ask_aubry
I would no jokes cut all contact with such monstrous people. Also what is this nonsense about 'grandparent rights' OMG. Get out of town. That whole family is disgraceful, and no, victims do NOT have to forgive abusers for the sake of 'family harmony'.
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@ask_aubry
These dudes: we are the family men, the protectors and providers, the rational and logical ones.
Also these dudes: I will torpedo my entire existence if attention isn't on me 24/7, why does a baby need so much, wahhhhhhh.
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@ask_aubry
If the husband does absolutely nothing about this gross creepiness, it's time to scoop up the kids and leave. They do not need to see this crap (and if the kids are boys, MIL will be chasing them next.)
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@ask_aubry
Doesn't matter what it is, he destroyed something she loved. Maybe because she went away, maybe he doesn't want to move, but there is a nasty, petty undertone here. I don't believe for a second the trying to help excuse.
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@ask_aubry
Sounds a whole lot like a much older predator seized upon a really vulnerable young lady used to receiving less than bare minimum. Making her copy late wife's mannerisms, hobbies, wear her clothes? Nope. Massive ick factor. Sierra is right to be concerned.
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Let's see more more MORE romances with characters in their 30s, 40s, 50s etc finding love and having wild hot sex.
This horrid notion that anyone not married/partnered by 30 has missed out, must be ruthlessly destroyed.
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Dear publishers,
If you want to sell more romance, acquire more romance.
Don't wrap up women's fiction in romance paper and deny readers the one thing they expect: HEA.
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One last thought cos I am SUPER irritable about this.
Diversity in publishing is NOT more white, straight women writing outside their lane. It is making a space for and shining a light on queer authors and authors of color.
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@ask_aubry
Imagine going through the trauma of reporting, of having evidence, witnesses, of actually being believed and gaining a conviction...only for some effing judge to be all 'nah, poor widdle rapist has suffered enough, won't somebody think of the rapist???'
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Saw a review that two-starred a historical romance because it contained 'modern American curse words like fuck'
That spine-chilling feral howl was me, raising an undead etymology army. The anachronistic apocalypse is here.
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@ask_aubry
It's purposeful. People minimise women's pain/surgery/recovery etc BECAUSE they want them back to fulfilling their roles swiftly. The world would fall apart if each woman who needed to stop actually did.
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This might sound weird for a romance author, but I hate 'surprise' public proposals SO SO SO MUCH.
They always feel performative. And have a massive pressure undertone.
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@ask_aubry
Sounds like yet another pathetic, useless dude whining that everything changed when they had a kid. Has this cheater done ANYTHING other than neg his wife?
Run, Erin, and find an actual adult who will treat you right.
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People who patronisingly chirp 'not your mother's romance novel!' have clearly never read the bonkbusters that were topping the charts in the 80s. Quit disrespecting Krantz, Collins, Cooper, Conran etc who wrote far hotter books than you do.
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Pretty sure those who gleefully promo books as 'not your mother's romance' have no idea what their mum was actually reading.
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One hilarious thing about Bridgerton reviews: all those acting like this is a completely modern sexy take on Regency society rather than accuracy for once.
The real life Regency was wild, people. WILD. Publishing & Austen adaptions did you wrong with the white straight G-rated.
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I have come to hate the phrase 'romance needs to be more realistic' with the power of a thousand suns.
HEAs are hope and respite. And we all need that.
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@JessPected
All the big tough guys flexing over a literal kid getting beaten up. They don't know jack about respect. It's earned, not demanded through violence.
I highly doubt the father would be so hot headed around someone his own age/size.
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@ask_aubry
Oh, her husband is 'impulsive' huh?
No sweetie, that does not explain your sister's terror AT ALL. 100% something else has happened/is happening. And if he's saying creepy stuff like 'where's my hug' I'm afraid it's really bad.
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Dearest writers, it is 2019.
Women who enjoy sex and get it how they like it are not sluts.
Women who date and have consensual safe sex are not sluts.
Please take your gross misogynistic hot takes on women + sex and fuck right off.
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Permanent shoutout to romance authors. Writing joy and hope and hot sex within the bleakest of timelines takes incredible skill.
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@ask_aubry
Lol, she didn't offer a single reason to stay with this utterly useless man, including love, so happy future divorce, queen.
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Just saw an article saying that Bridgerton S2 has cut right back on the sex scenes to go in a more Austen-esque direction with longing looks, finger grazes etc and WHYYYYYYYYYY?????????
Why must we constantly regress to this FALSE depiction of a G-rated Regency era??
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It's very, VERY simple.
If you want romance cash, write an actual romance. With a happily ever after.
You aren't edgy/a rebel/a groundbreaker trying to trick readers. You'll be another stat in the fail column. Romance readers choose the genre for a reason. HEA no matter what.
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I've lost all interest in historical romances with manwhore/fuckwit rakes. Don't care how well they are redeemed.
Give me the cinnamon rolls, the nerdy doms (or subs) the grumpy hearts of gold, the virgins eager to be taught, the broken recluse loved out of his fortress.
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@ask_aubry
Hope Christian likes his hand, cos it is gonna be his only companion forevermore.
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@ask_aubry
Sorry, 'mom', I'm seeing zero reasons why Stephanie would leave a loving, stable home to return to you and your ah husband (WHO LITERALLY MADE YOU KICK OUT AN 11YO)
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All genre fiction has an 'expected' outcome. A mystery is solved. Villain vanquished. Challenge conquered.
Hating on romance for ending with a HEA is as ludicrous as hating a thriller cos the criminal is caught.
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@ask_aubry
He definitely needs to tell his wife, she might not even know she was recorded. Then police and lawyers. Slam the ex so hard he'll never consider doing such an awful thing again. I repeat, SLAM the ex, otherwise he'll only get bolder and do worse.
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Sex slang etymology (aka words perfectly ok in historical romance)
As per Green timeline of slang/OED.
- dick 1836
- quim 1735
- pussy 1699
- fuck early 1500s
- cock early 1300s
- cunt 1230
Your task: educate a pearl clutcher and/or shut down 'anachronistic' lies.
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@ask_aubry
The husband is a groomer and a predator, and OP absolutely did the right thing leaving with the kids.
She didn't break up the family. He did, with his cheating.
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Yes, PLEASE, more romances with main characters 40+.
And not just second chance trope, but finding love for the first time. And having tons of sex. And happily childfree. And historical. (Lol, I know, I know, now I'm moving into unicorn territory, but still...)
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@ask_aubry
Lol, don't lighten up, dump him immediately. It wasn't a joke, he was testing to see what he could get away with.
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I read romance because I enjoy the comfort of knowing no matter what, the MCs get a HEA.
Not interested AT ALL in authors or publishers who want to fuck with that or misrepresent the actual genre they are offering.
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@ask_aubry
The fact that he made such a huge deal about sister with pics etc screams dump him.
But OP needs therapy to deal with her own negative thoughts.
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@ask_aubry
The way Mr. OpSec AP rants about HER being deceitful is wild. (Also sounds like wife's skills in this area are infinitely better.)
On a side note, it is hilarious he talks therapy etc when at no point has he expressed even vague remorse about his cheating.
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@NovelistJessica
@bandherbooks
I'm fascinated by this Northanger Abbey cover. Was she startled by his hand on her arm, or his massive boner jabbing her in the butt??
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@ask_aubry
Ughhhhhh, someone being a good father is not a reason to stay if they are a terrible partner. He will mistreat the daughter while continuing to give the son everything. Run, ma'am.
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@ask_aubry
ARGH a pox on the words 'I don't want to ruin his life'
Men who commit SA ruin their OWN lives with their OWN ACTIONS.
When not held accountable, they go on to offend again, and probably worse. If the in-laws choose to 'hate' you, then they are garbage also.
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@ask_aubry
'bodycount' talk is the reddest flag ever that someone is absolute rubbish in bed. It's why they are so desperate for the 18yo virgins who don't know how great sex can be.
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@ask_aubry
The way this dude gives off strong ick from like the first words he says. Then goes into talking kink, which made me recoil, because if he doesn't accept no/boundaries, then he isn't safe as a potential kink partner.
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@ask_aubry
So weird how often these trad dudes who call themselves 'alphas' and 'protectors and providers' abandon their wife and kids.
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@ask_aubry
She has the resources to hire an excellent live-in nanny and should do so. Divorce the husband (sure wouldn't want any more 'broken' condoms) and carry on doing your great neuro work.
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@ask_aubry
Ummmmmmm what medical condition do you need pills for to stop yourself doing that????
Facts are, he assaulted a vulnerable patient and should not be anywhere near them, ever again.
To call this 'socially awkward' is actually disgraceful.
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Saw a request for historical romances with older, independent heroines and a bunch of people were offering up books where she was like 26.
🥴😢
Shoutout to all the crones and fossils in historical romance that made it past this ancient age.
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Yikes, the whole 'authors don't do it for money, they do it for love' position shits me.
This is my job. It pays the bills. Hell yes I do it for the money. Anyone who romanticises the starving creative in the tower and pure art crap, can fuck off forever.
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@ask_aubry
This video demonstrates the reality for pretty much every woman when they seek help from LE re: stalking or harassment. They get ignored/mocked/gaslit while the predator laughs.
(The same LE who will be SHOCKED when women end up in hospital or dead. Who could have foreseen??)
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Dear writers:
The reason found family is so important, especially to queer folk, is that blood relatives can be plain awful.
No HEA should be contingent on reconciliation with a toxic relative.
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One trope I can read forever: the grumpy/stern hero who is all 'I'M NOT IN LOVE, GOD DAMN IT' and everyone around him is lol uh huh sure totally, cos he's doing things that prove he is in DEEP.
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HEAs should reflect MCs together, living and loving the way that suits THEM. Not anyone else.
HEA is not a checklist. People don't have to tick boxes like 'wedding' or 'kids' or 'reconcile with family' to be blissfully happy.
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@Ragdoll_Inc
I am in this tweet so hard. Night driving + rain is my Godzilla. Can't see a damn thing and it is terrifying. I paid for the anti reflector coat on my glasses, only years later an actual honest optometrist told me that doesn't work for everyone.
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@ask_aubry
The way everyone is centering the young boy and totally disregarding the girl is honestly gross.
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@ask_aubry
OMG I literally thought this was a teen boy (cos this is how my teen niblings are.) But he's 35???
Nah, chuck that rotten fish back in the sea.
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@ask_aubry
OH SO CASUALLY 😂
(what's the bet they were talking about something utterly unrelated and he cannonballed it into the conversation...)
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@ask_aubry
The way he is not over the ex and devastated she doesn't care he's engaged. 😂😂
The fiancée should end it now.
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Forget anything in the paranormal/sci-fi/fantasy/historical subgenres, the only completely unrealistic character in the entire world of romance is the hot billionaire with some sort of moral compass.
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@ask_aubry
Lol when the time wheel turns and this 'father' thinks his daughters are going to care for him.
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My fervent hope for 2020: the end of bigoted and misogynistic gatekeeping in historical romance.
May those who shriek the ANACHRONISTIC lie at books including queer love, POC, feminist women, happily childfree MCs, explicit sex, explicit language etc, forever step on lego.
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UGH. Just saw 'non conventional HEA' for a book where the heroine didn't want children, and can we please not.
HEA is not tickbox wedding + kids. it's however that relationship lives their best lives together, strong & secure enough to NOT fall prey to the expectations of others.
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"wahhhh, romance genre convention of a HEA ending is GATEKEEPING wahhhh"
Assholes who want romance cash without writing a romance are tedious as fuck.
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@ask_aubry
The number of dudes who think they are the main character in EVERYONE ELSE'S life will forever be wild. Like no, that server/customer/client/student/colleague/neighbour is just trying to get through the day.
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@ask_aubry
Imagine being such a soulless monster that you could publicly call that 'suicide'.
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Dreamspinner calling for submissions when they owe current authors tens of thousands in unpaid royalties is a truly dystopian act. Do not send your book baby there. DO NOT.
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So, S3 of Bridgerton is definitely Colin and Penelope. Here's hoping they stray once again from source material, shove him onto a slow boat to nowhere, while Pen finds someone worthy of her sassy self.
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I swear my eyes roll right out of my head every time I see a historical romance review saying the heroine is 'too modern'.
Women breaking rules, pushing boundaries, fighting for change, ignoring propriety and the patriarchy, forging new paths, happily kid-free, IS NOT NEW.
FFS.
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