Duchess Moaning $parkle ✨ (Parody) ♛♕♔♚
@MoaningSparkle
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Married to the Duke of Duchess 👸🏽Big on Privacy. Global Humanitarian. Prince Archie™ Princess Lilibet™ #MeghanMarkle #parody #comedy Me/My/Mine💫💜
I am superior ✨
Joined February 2019
“Climate change wreaking havoc on our planet.”.~ Prince Harry. Prince Harry took 21 private jet trips in two years - including a flight on a private jet for a polo match in Aspen Valley. It would have been 22 flights if he wasn’t an Eco Warrior. 💪🏽 .
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I moved to the US for privacy, to escape the British media. But now I’m in LA I can’t stop putting Myself up on giant billboards. #MeghanMarkIe #princeharry
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I have ensured there are no single-use plastics on my private jet back to Canada this morning. ✈️ . What are you doing to save the environment?. #Megxit #MeghanAndHarry #meganandharry #HarryandMeghan.
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I will always protect My children’s privacy. They will never be exploited like poor Harry was. Especially when naked in the bath.
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Remove this article now!!! 😡 . The Most Annoying Celebrities You're Sick Of In 2022, Ranked. 1. Meghan, Duchess of Sussex .2. Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex
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My husband’s title ‘Prince’ caused him insurmountable, almost unsurvivable, genetic pain. That’s why we are insisting on titles for our children. Blessings . Just Moaning 👸🏻. #ARCHIE #lilibet #PrincessofWales .#MeghanMarkIe #PrinceHarry .#princearchie .#ArchetypesWithMeghan.
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Many tea cups went flying in Montecito today. 😡 🫖 ☕️ . #DumbPrinceAndHisStupidWife #DumbPrinceandStupidWife #PrinceHarry
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Harry will fight to the bitter end for the children to have titles from the establishment that ruined his life; that he publicly despises.
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Since my 2-hour advertorial on Oprah no one, not one person, has asked if I’m okay 😢
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I was so offended by the selfish, greedy British public wanting photos of My children. I saved them for My $100m deal with @netflix . Happy now?
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It’s sometimes necessary to turn and walk away from unimportant people. Even when they are mid-sentence. #HarryandMeghaninNigeria .
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I’m being persecuted by @netflix … and no one—not one person— has asked Me if I’m okay. 😢.
Netflix has dropped Meghan Markle's animated series as part of a wave of cutbacks
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My husband’s family made Me feel so unloved & under appreciated we fled for our family’s safety to crime-free LA. Now, said family, refuse to fund our modest 20-strong ex-SAS bodyguard team (and armour car convey) for our phenomenally dangerous UK Tour. My suffering is endless.
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Personal question: Do you think I overdid the fake tan? 😬. Before After
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I left England to seek a private life as an ordinary citizen, but I just can’t help using My Royal title to get attention-seeking speaking gigs.
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Harry, I’ve left 506 messages. Call me.
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No one from the Royal Family called Me yesterday to ask if I’m okay. They are so selfish.
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I think it’s totalling normal and appropriate the Godfather of your newborn daughter be a (rich and culturally trendy) stranger you’ve never met.
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Lilibet asked, with a tear in her left eye, why her grandfather the King won’t publicly acknowledge her Princess title. I explained inter-generational pain, racism and envy and how we will exact revenge. She smiled then tenderly dried her eye. We embraced then fed the chickens.
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Look at Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me and H ❤️
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If anyone is looking to buy a little cottage in Windsor, recently renovated to sophisticated American standards, please PM me. 🏠.
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JLo treats Ben Affleck like I treat Harry. It’s good for them. ❤️.
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“When I first met my now husband, my friends were really happy because I was so happy. But my British friends said to me: ‘I’m sure he’s great. But you shouldn’t do it because the British tabloids will destroy your life’”. Thankfully the US media is kinder & supportive of Me 🥰
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This amnesia is just dreadful. I forgot I was vegan 🥺
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My husband’s family asked Me go to a very sad & emotionally exhausting event today. No one, not one person, asked Me if I was okay. They are all so selfish. #MentalHealthAwareness . #QueenElizabeth #PrinceHarryUniform #MeghanMarkle #princessofwales
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I have commenced legal action against The Candle 🕯
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Such lovely memories of visiting My cousin Leroy in prison when I was pregnant with My first child. 🥰
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This is My favourite photo of Me in SA wearing My mudcloth designer dress & chemically straighten hair. Zoom in to see the adoration on the faces of My sisters. 👸🏻. 👩🏿🧒🏿👩🏿👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾🦱👩🏿👩🏿👩🏿🧒🏿👩🏾🦱👩🏾🦱👩🏾🦱👩🏿👩🏿👩🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿🧒🏿. #mudcloth #VoetsekMeghan #VoetsekMeghanMarkle #SouthAfrica
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I was so busy at the Beverly Hills Hotel last week 😉, I forgot to wish you all…. A Happy St Patrick’s day ☘️ . (I’m 49% Irish)
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If you are reading this you are invading My privacy. Go away.
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The most important thing you can do is be your authentic self x
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Men need to be held by two hands and constantly directed and corrected. It’s exhausting. But worth it for the joy it brings them.
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A beautiful family photo from our last official outing. I’m framing it for Archie as he’ll never see any of them ever again (except his father!). We all had so much fun!. Laughing & chatting like old friends. And look at Me! Such a professional. Straight into the camera lens 📸
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Sometimes holding hands is not enough. One may need to pull and rub the object’s arm as a reminder to stay subservient and on-script. X
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Distressingly, both My father-in-law and sister-in-law are in hospital yet no one has asked if I’m okay. You’re all so selfish.
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On My return Archie said:. “Mommy! I saw you on TV. You were so brave & dignified despite being surrounded by misogynistic racists. “You also looked the most beautiful.”. We embraced. The maids, nannies & footmen all burst into spontaneous applause👏🏽. It’s good to be home.
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Children adore Me 🌟❤️👸🏽❤️🌟 .
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BREAKING NEWS . HRH Prince Harry (King in Waiting), is extending his paternity leave from 4 months to 4 years. The Royal Prince wishes to spend more time with the perfect family he didn’t have whilst growing up. <ends>
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There’s been so many men that I’ve simply lost count!. Anyone know who this is?
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This lockdown period has enabled Harry and I to fulfil our dreams of changing genders . This is the first photo released to the public . More to come ❤️
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Nothing says equality more than a £4,657 Jason Wu dress.
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Thanks to Oprah and Netflix we now have the privacy for which we sacrificed so much.
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I hear Britain has a new handsome billionaire as PM. Is he single (now or soon?). Asking for a friend.
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Despite growing up in poverty, I managed a trip to Buckingham Palace when I was 15. I told Oprah:. “I didn't grow up knowing much about the Royal Family. It wasn't something that was part of conversation at home. It wasn't something that we followed”. Well not much anyway.
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My dress was inspired by the starched napkins at Eugenie’s wedding. 🤍
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Do you know how much I was paid for the event known as the Queen’s funeral?. £0. Shocking, I know. Very odd the little people like ushers and guards got paid, yet I didn’t—despite playing a leading role (superbly as usual). Such a lack of gratitude.
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Despite ALL the instructions and ALL the practice he almost walked forward without holding hands. 🙄. Luckily no one noticed.
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My next episode of Archetypes is:. Narcissism. Who should I interview?.
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“The private life has to private” H in 2016. I just wish people would leave us alone. WE JUST WANT PRIVACY!.
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I’ve just been diagnosed with amnesia 😞.
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Just landed back in Canada 🇨🇦 . Delighted my trip to the U.K. went so well. Busy day ahead: keynote speaker at the ‘How to be a Great Parent’ Conference before picking up Archie. Hope he recognises me. Love you all 💓. #HarryandMeghan #MeghanMarkel #megexit #Megxit #.
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My next book will be an autobiography about my early adult life. it shall be the prequel to THE BENCH, it will be called. THE BIKE . 🚴🏾.
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Well that went well. I’ve got Harry on a global tour talk about his mental illness. It’s wonderful that we can make money out of his weak mind & his mother’s demise. Diana would be proud of me. It’s such a shame, for her, that she never got to meet me ❤️
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This is the longest I’ve gone without speaking.
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We now have not only the paps after us, we have the #Taliban 😳. On the bright side, it will give us new material for ‘At Home with the Harkles’ #2. And something new to complain about. #HaroldsbrokenPearls #PrinceHarryhasgonemad #MeghanandHarry #H&M #killcount #HarrysNecklace.
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For privacy reasons we MUST be on the balcony. In the front.
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When I said I wanted us back in the headlines, this is NOT what I meant. 😡. #PDiddy #PrinceHarry #PrinceHarryandDiddy
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I love nothing more than donning a $3,000 designer dress to lecture on poverty and inequality. I love to talk of bringing families together from My $14m LA mansion that our rejected & renounced families will NEVER visit. Blessings,. 💫 MM . #VaxLive.
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I’ve been suffering so much over the last few weeks due to My beloved grandmother-in-law’s ill health, yet NO ONE has asked Me how I am. 😢
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I JUST GOT STOPPED BY THE POLICE DRIVING THROUGH HACKNEY. MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW. @metpoliceuk . I recorded the whole incident.
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This account is under a sustained attack claiming it’s part of a paid, coordinated hate campaign against Meghan Markle. I guarantee you there’s no co-ordination from this account, no hate & sadly no one pays me for it. Its ONLY raison d'être is to provide some giggles. 1/2.
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People who owe Me an apology. The King.Queen Consort.Prince William.Princess Catherine (x6).Princess Charlotte 🙄.All the Palace staff.Every Editor of every British tabloid.Thomas Markle.Samantha Markle .@piersmorgan .@realDonaldTrump .@Lord_Sugar .@LozzaFox . I’m waiting…
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I’m very busy tonight redecorating Frogmore Cottage and lifting cleaning standards. 🧹🪣🧼. I definitely did NOT want to go to the King’s banquet with a thousand of the world’s leaders gathering in one place. Sounds dangerous. Blessings. The girl who turned a Prince into a frog.
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No one understands how difficult it is owning such a big, ostentatious property with so many servants. The house & gardens are so huge the Help can easily hide. Currently I’m nursing a sore throat from screeching all morning. Just wouldn’t happen if I lived in an apartment. 😔
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Breaking News 🚨. I am NOT attending the King’s Coronation. My modest demands of balcony appearance, a private apology & singing Happy Birthday to Archie in Westminster Abbey were curtly declined. They would not even pay Me My old Soho House Escort hourly rate!. Abhorrent.
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💥URGENT 📸PHOTO CALL 📸 URGENT ‼️ . The Duchess of Sussex will be available to photograph at Montecito Walmart car park TOMORROW at noon. She will bring her dog, doll and will take (pre-approved) questions. Paparazzi will be paid per photo published and given free jam. 📸
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Every day I wait for the postman. … yet still no Coronation invitation.
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I generously offered Kate the opportunity to improve her public profile by being on My podcast. We will talk about how difficult life is. I’m yet to hear back. So rude and ungrateful.
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After a traumatic early life due to parental neglect & ancestral grief, Harry has finally found great joy with Me. 💙
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This is not the “half in, half” out I demanded. 😡 . I want to be the star ⭐️ at the Trooping the Colour 😭. (I’m running out of tea cups to throw).
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There’s so much interest in My Princess Lilibet I am willing to share some beautiful photos to prove she is indeed real. Enjoy 🥰
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Happy Birthday to the Prince of Wales . From the Spares. X
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Harry’s life made a complete turnaround the fateful day he met Me. In celebration of Me and all I’ve done to improve Harry’s life, post your favourite photos of us looking joyous! . I’ll start. #MondayMorning #JOY #MeghanMarkle #mondaythoughts
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We have a very happy announcement to make:. Harry & I are adopting @GretaThunberg . We are all thrilled, and together hope to win every humanitarian and environmental award and accolade . #winwin #MeghanMarkle #Mexit #Harrymeghan #woke.
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Harry in his dark days before he met Me. 🥰
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Last night I had a terrible dream. 💭 . No one knew who I was 🥺🥺🥺
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"And then I was silent," the soon-to-be mother of two said before Oprah asked: . “Were you silent, or were you silenced?”. Meghan responded, "The latter.". #meghanmarkle
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I totally LOVE African women & they totally ADORE Me. We are all sisters from the same African family. 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾👩🏿 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👸🏻 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏾👩🏾 👩🏿👩🏿. #mudcloth . #VoetsekMeghan.
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BREAKING NEWS. I will be topless by the pool at Montecito mansion TOMORROW MORNING. Media drones welcome between 9am and 10am. They will NOT be shot down during this time.
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@piersmorgan Just went for a walk through My 5 acres of gardens & received fulsome support from My Mexican gardener, My Filipino maid, My French chef, My Nigerian driver who informed Me I have ‘the total backing of the entire world!’. Good to have the entire Universe on My side. #Meghan.
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Princess Lilibet spent a beautiful day out at the Garden Center with Grandma Dame Doria today. Beautiful 😍.
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No hate, no malice is ever intended. We all need a laugh these days & that is my only intention. I don’t want to live in a world where comedy is forbidden. How about you?. Please defend parody accounts. ❤️. 2/2.
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I was such a shy (perhaps a little naive), young girl when I married into the Royal Family.
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