MatthewDicks
@MatthewDicks
Followers
11,046
Following
351
Media
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Statuses
63,984
Bestselling author, storyteller, teacher. 59-time Moth StorySLAM winner & 9-time GrandSLAM champ. Host of Speak Up Storytelling podcast. Loves golf. Hates sleep
Newington, CT (41.716639,-72.7
Joined December 2008
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@realDonaldTrump
You initially said you needed a 90 day ban in order to improve vetting procedures. It’s been 90 days. What the hell have you been doing?
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@realDonaldTrump
You were playing golf and tweeting about the 2016 election WHILE THE EMBASSY BURNED.
You’re a disgrace to our great nation and wholly incapable of executing the duties of President.
You’re a joke. A selfish, self-centered moron. A bigoted, flat-footed coward.
Quit now.
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569
4K
@realDonaldTrump
Donald, you’re the only person in history to bankrupt a casino.
Trump steak and vodka? Bankrupt.
Trump airlines? Bankrupt.
Trump University: A scam that stole millions fro hard working Americans.
Your brand is a joke. A big, fat loser. The laughingstock of the world.
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@realDonaldTrump
No help from Democrats? The plan was specifically designed IN SECRET by 13 Republican men. How exactly did you want the Democrats to help?
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@realDonaldTrump
You didn’t give all the credit to FEMA & the Coast Guard & the people of the Bahamas because you HAD TO ADD the words, ”and me.”
Your typical dash of pathetic self-obsession and narcissism.
The kind of thing NO OTHER PRESIDENT IN AMERICAN HISTORY WOULD EVEN THINK OF SAYING.
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2K
@realDonaldTrump
Okay…
Dear God,
Please help rid our nation of this racist, sexist, incompetent loser who cages children, brags about committing sexual assault, steals from charities, operates fake universities, and colludes with foreign powers to subvert our election system.
Amen.
Good?
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@realDonaldTrump
Every time you make these announcements, we later find out that the deal had been in place months.
Sign of desperation.
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@realDonaldTrump
Did you hear?
Pelosi made this photo her Twitter cover photo because it makes her look so damn good.
Also, see everyone on your side of the table with their heads down? They’re ashamed to be on your team, Donald. You’re an embarrassment to the nation.
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@DiamondandSilk
@realDonaldTrump
When did the media say you should stop tweeting about Russia? The media loves your tweets. A peek into the mind of a petulant child king.
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2K
@VP
Doctors & nurses disagree. Healthcare administrators disagree. The OMB disagrees. AMERICANS disagree. Your bill has an 18% approval rating.
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@realDonaldTrump
Go to bed, dumbass. The only thing you’ve done all day is tweet.
I’d call you a “Do Nothing” President except you’'ve caged a lot of kids, sexually assaulted a lot of women, told a billion lies, stolen a lot of money from the US taxpayer, and played a lot of golf.
Poorly.
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2K
@realDonaldTrump
The southern White House?
What a joke.
In 2019, you spent 1 out of every 5 days at a Trump property after promising that you'd spend your days in the White House, away from the golf course.
Your “Southern White House:” is costing us HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF DOLLARS, scumbag.
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2K
@realDonaldTrump
@FoxNews
@abcnews
@BretBaier
Perhaps your terrible polling numbers reflect the fact that you put kids in cages, defended Nazis, paid hush money to porn stars, bragged about committing sexual assault, lied about Mexico paying for the wall, failed to build your stupid wall, and lie constantly.
Maybe?
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1K
@realDonaldTrump
You abandoned our allies. Allowed them to be slaughtered. Beheaded. Soldiers who fought alongside American forces.
You’ve allowed ISIS fighters and terrorist to go free.
You make up all the stories you want, dumbass, but even the Republicans have repudiated this decision.
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@realDonaldTrump
You’re disgusting.
You offer to help homeless American citizens only if you’re asked politely and absolved of all responsibility.
You’re a needy, pathetic loser. A low-rent, inhumane, indecent scumbag who is trying to deflect attention away from your impeachment.
Quit now.
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1K
@realDonaldTrump
This is not how tariffs work, dumbass.
Either you have absolutely no understanding of basic economics or you’re purposefully lying to your base because you’ve accomplished nothing of any substance.
Idiot or liar?
Moron or grifter?
Which is it, Donald?
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@realDonaldTrump
Did you just thank yourself? In the third person?
Don’t you see how pathetic and needy that sounds? People all over the world are laughing at you, Donald. Laughing at your sad, desperate need for attention and praise.
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@realDonaldTrump
@foxandfriends
Thank goodness the President is watching TV this morning and doing his important work on Twitter like supporting hate speech, retweeting white nationalists, and assisting wealthy rappers in jail overseas.
I mean, there are children in cages in American, but priorities.
Right?
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, you can’t reverse history and pretend that YOU didn’t release the summary of the call.
You released the damn thing, Donald.
You were just too stupid to realize how damaging it would be to you.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, this is how nearly every Republican in Congress feels about you.
They’re simply cowards who are willing to accept your stupidity and immorality in order to promote their own agenda.
They hate you. They know you’re incompetent.
Just like the majority of Americans.
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@realDonaldTrump
You know what President Xi is thinking:
"That moron lost more money in a decade than any other American? Damn! I don’t need to make a deal with that broke-ass loser who doesn’t even understand how tariffs work. Let’s just wait out that insecure grifter. He’ll crack soon."
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@realDonaldTrump
The media? Really?
Trump asks Florida rally crowd: "How do you stop these people" from crossing the border?
"Shoot them!" an attendee shouts.
Trump: "That's only in the panhandle you can get away with that stuff. Only in the panhandle.”
YOU’RE THE PROBLEM, YOU RACIST SCUMBAG.
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@realDonaldTrump
A disgrace is sexually assaulting women or claiming to sexually assault women to make Billy Bush like you.
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@realDonaldTrump
Fact check:
You fired your pandemic response team two years ago.
You called the virus a hoax.
You claimed that COVID-19 was no worse than the flu.
You’ve lied repeatedly about tests being available to anyone who needs one.
You ignored intel agencies warning in January.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, New York City despises you. New Yorkers have always known that you’re a racist con man with zero talent and zero intellect.
New York’s finest are still the finest, you pathetic hack.
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@realDonaldTrump
@CNN
This is not true, Donald, and you damn well know it. Informed Americans know it.
When you can’t do anything right, don’t know anything, and fail at every turn, all that is left is to lie to the American public.
It’s the futile and desperate act of a loser.
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@realDonaldTrump
Did you see what’s trending today on Twitter, Donald?
Most Unmanly President and
#MuchVeryGood
Americans are laughing at your stupidity, jobless because of your ignorance, and dying because of your incompetence.
You are a laughingstock. A joke. An embarrassment to this nation.
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@realDonaldTrump
Why, Donald?
I thought you were innocent of all obstruction and collusion.
An innocent man has nothing to fear. Right?
Son why are you so worried?
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@realDonaldTrump
You mocked that journalist in the same way that Alec Baldwin mocks you, except his impressions are hilarious.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, the Democrats have attempted to pass comprehensive background checks A LONG TIME AGO.
MANY TIMES.
Republicans blocked it every time.
This is not a “come together” issue.
This is a "Republicans need to stop taking NRA money and DO THE RIGHT GODDAMN THING” issue.
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@realDonaldTrump
I don’t know, Donald.
Most people - including Republicans - think she’s owning you.
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@SpeakerRyan
You and Trump and your fellow Republicans will be viewed as villains in the history books for this. You have embarrassed your country.
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@realDonaldTrump
You owe millions of dollars to cities all over America where you have held rallies and failed to pay for the police and other services that you hired for the event.
Bragging about picking up the tab for a private dinner is pathetic and insulting and stupid, Donald.
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@realDonaldTrump
@Cabinet
That was an orchestrated praise session for a petulant little man who lost in court AGAIN today and demands fealty from his people. SAD!
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@realDonaldTrump
This may be hard to understand, but we would like our future elections to not have a sprinkling of Russian involvement.
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@realDonaldTrump
You’re attacking a 16 year-old girl, you flat-footed coward.
It’s unbelievable.
Your fragile ego, complete lack of shame, and pathetic need for attention are boundless.
What the hell is wrong with you?
You’re frightened of a 16 year-old climate activist.
God you suck.
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@realDonaldTrump
A disgrace is promising repeatedly to release your tax returns and then refusing to do so.
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@realDonaldTrump
My 401k and portfolio performed brilliantly under
@BarackObama
’s Presidency.
Lots of record highs and sustained growth.
And it came without the racism, disregard for American lives, and utter mismanagement of the federal government.
You’re a joke, Donald. America knows it.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, why are you shouting? YOU”RE THE ONE who's been changing the name of your stupid wall.
Steel slats. Powerful barrier.
It’s you, Donald.
You’re an incompetent old man, watching TV in his pajamas, literally shouting at himself.
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@realDonaldTrump
Do you really think Americans have forgotten what President
@BarackObama
dealt with in 2008?
You have no idea what it’s like to clean up a mess. You took over in a period of low unemployment, a rising stock market, and an improving national debt.
Stop your stupid whining.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, people who speak of themselves in the third person are typcially egomaniacal morons.
They’re the kind of people who have no real friends.
They’re the kind of people who pose for photos with the infant of murdered parents and smile while offering a bizarre thumbs up.
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@realDonaldTrump
So what you’re saying, Donald, is that:
1. You could easily help homeless Americans
2. You won’t help homeless Americans unless someone asks you politely
What kind of goddamn monster are you?
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, listen to this carefully:
You don’t get the credit you think you deserve because every accomplishment is overshadowed by your racism, sexism, endless lies, caging of children at the border, and the stupidity of things like Sharpie-Gate.
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@realDonaldTrump
"Shut down and closed for business?”
West Virginia’s unemployment rate in 2016 was 6.1%. Today it’s 5.3%.
It’s improve by less than one percent, Donald.
It’s GDP has risen by 7% since 2016, but it rose by more than 10% under
@BarackObama
.
What the hell are you taking about?
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967
@realDonaldTrump
You don’t get to agree with anything, dummy.
This is Congress, a co-equal branch of government, doing WHAT THEY WANT TO DO. Conducting oversight. Questioning witnesses. Investigating possible crimes.
Apparently scaring you in the process.
They don't need your permission.
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@realDonaldTrump
You originally asked for a 90 day ban to improve vetting procedures.
That was more than 120 days ago.
What the hell have you been doing?
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@realDonaldTrump
No one ever thought that the hacking involved the voting machines. You can try to deflect, but we are not stupid. We know.
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@realDonaldTrump
How about this deal:
Repeal ObamaCare, but then you and Congress must also agree to drop your own healthcare until you have a replacement.
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@realDonaldTrump
You ran a fake university that stole millions from hard working Americans, Donald.
You’ve stiffed thousands of workers of wages.
You still owe Washington DC millions for your inauguration.
You’re hardly in a position to be pointing fingers, Donald.
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911
@foxandfriends
@realDonaldTrump
Never in history has a US president worked so hard to fight against the intel findings of every US ally to prove the innocence of an enemy.
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@realDonaldTrump
Also, the world marched against you yesterday. Australia. England. France. Japan. None of them had the opportunity to vote.
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@realDonaldTrump
But Donald... Mueller specifically said that he could not clear you of obstruction. That your embrace of WikiLeaks was concerning. That you & your staff knowingly lied. That you could be indicted when your Presidency ends.
THAT is why this investigation by Congress continues.
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@realDonaldTrump
Wow, Donald. A Getty image. Not photoshopped. Not altered. Just you.
Fat, ugly you. Ridiculous tan lines and all.
No wonder you cried “Photoshop!” when it was released.
You look AWFUL.
Also
#TrumpIsACoward
is trending on Twitter right now.
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914
@realDonaldTrump
You’re reporting on US intelligence gathering via Twitter?
What the hell is wrong for you?
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896
@Reince
@realDonaldTrump
@POTUS
@GOP
You take victory laps over an election that happened months ago while millions of Americans are in danger of losing healthcare. GROW UP.
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@POTUS
Why are you rooting against a healthcare program that insures millions of Americans and saves lives every day?
DISGUSTING.
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@realDonaldTrump
If it’s so inexpensive, then pay for it yourself, you supposed-billionaire.
Don’t take money designated for our parks to host this ridiculous, politicized vanity project that even the military doesn’t want.
You’re a draft-dodging disgrace to every man and woman in uniform.
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@realDonaldTrump
EVERY President feels unfairly covered by the media. You're just the first one to constantly whine about it like a baby.
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@realDonaldTrump
We all saw the video. We all know exactly what you did. It’s hard to be dishonest about something so clear and obvious.
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896
@realDonaldTrump
You’re bragging about paying for the private dinner to celebrate your daughter’s tenth wedding anniversary?
What the hell is wrong with you?
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@realDonaldTrump
“Any negative polls?” For the rest of time? Is this how it works now? If the data isn’t in your favor, it’s fake?
#resist
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883
@realDonaldTrump
@ATT
@CNN
“Stoped.”
Your inability to write or spell or punctuate with any accuracy or articulation offers the world a false picture of the United States, Donald.
They assume we’re all as stupid and uneducated as you.
36
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843
@realDonaldTrump
New low, Desperate Donald. Gutter level. You disgrace the office of the President in new and profound ways on a daily basis.
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@realDonaldTrump
Donald, a sleaze bag is a person who brags about serial sexual assault.
A sleaze bag is someone who owns and operates a fake university that steals millions from the American people.
A sleaze bag is a person who separates families on the border and puts children in cages.
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@realDonaldTrump
Hey Donald, in case you missed it while tweeting insults:
The CIA has concluded that the Saudi crown prince ordered Jamal Khashoggi’s murder.
He was a Virginia resident. A journalist for a US newspaper. He had American children.
Will you just ignore this, you goddamn coward?
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824
@realDonaldTrump
@foxandfriends
Donald, it’s happening. You committed multiple impeachable offenses, and your desperate Twitter flailing will not stop it.
The first line of every bio and obit of Donald Trump FOREVER will mention impeachment.
Deservedly so, you goddamn racist traitor and all around loser.
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842
@realDonaldTrump
Ha! This is your saddest tweet ever!
Eventually…
a later date...
in some form…
Weak, Donald. So damn weak. Sad and weak and pathetic.
11
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813
@Reince
@realDonaldTrump
@POTUS
@GOP
A strong candidate?
1. Bragged about sexual assault.
2. Ran a fake university that stole millions.
3. Insulted POWs, disabled, and women.
89
98
782
@realDonaldTrump
You're President. Why are you asking Twitter to find the leakers in YOUR ADMINISTRATION?
So weird. SAD, too.
Go do your own work.
22
78
779
@realDonaldTrump
@kilmeade
@foxandfriends
Obama didn’t call Mexicans rapists. Didn’t defend Neo Nazis. Didn’t call African nations “shit hole countries.” He didn’t tell Congresswomen of color to go back to their countries. Didn’t say you could get away with shooting Mexicans in the panhandle. He’s not a racist like you.
14
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785
@realDonaldTrump
No one is protesting Beto, Donald. No is is telling him to be quiet.
A whole lot of people are protesting your very presence in their city. They all want you to shut up.
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820
@realDonaldTrump
A fine thought.
By the way, we have millions of Americans in danger of losing their healthcare, too. Including babies. Maybe help them, too?
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@realDonaldTrump
Great guy?
Was that before or after he mocked Michael J. Fox’s Parkinson’s disease or made fun of Ginsburg’s cancer or laughed at Eric Garner’s death?
Or maybe when he categorized Iraq war veterans opposed to the war as "the phony soldiers?”
Your kind of guy, Donald. For sure.
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81
800
@realDonaldTrump
You suck at negotiations, Donald.
What exactly have you negotiated since you came to office?
NAME ONE THING?
You couldn’t even get your OWN PARTY to fund your wall. Instead, you stole money from schools for the kids of military personnel.
You’re the worst negotiator ever.
135
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805
@realDonaldTrump
Not true. 58% Donald.
20% OF REPUBLICANS.
The fact that you’re so blatantly lying is evidence of your desperation. Your fear. Your cowardice.
19
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795
@realDonaldTrump
France on edge? What about us? We have a narcissist for President who tweets about reality TV and lies at every turn.
11
70
805
@realDonaldTrump
“I should be given apology.”
Saddest words ever spoken by a President. Words that will hang around your neck for the rest of your life.
27
70
763
@realDonaldTrump
It’s not, Donald. You still don’t have the funding. If the wall was “moving along quickly”
@FoxNews
would be airing Fox & Friends from the border every day.
38
81
762
@realDonaldTrump
Trump asks Florida rally crowd: "How do you stop these people" from crossing the border?
"Shoot them!" a attendee shouts out.
Trump: "That's only in the panhandle you can get away with that stuff. Only in the panhandle.”
YOU’RE THE PROBLEM, YOU RACIST SCUMBAG.
WORD MATTER.
36
100
779
@realDonaldTrump
FAKE NEWS!
You control the Senate, Donald.
You’ve also failed to nominate for HUNDREDS OF POSITIONS. More than any President ever.
16
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727
@realDonaldTrump
@FoxNews
Donald, if you’re using polling data to make decisions, it’s time to resign. The majority of Americans disapprove of your Presidency and didn’t even vote for you.
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707
@realDonaldTrump
Maybe you can use some of this money to pay back the $500,000 in fees that you still owe to El Paso.
Or the $7.5 million you still owe to Washington, DC.
You’re nothing more than a grifter and a thief, Donald. A huckster in a toupee. The laughingstock of the business world.
54
75
766
@realDonaldTrump
We are not receiving billions of dollars in tariffs from China. The American consumer is PAYING billions of dollars in tariffs.
You are either purposefully lying to the American people about how tariffs work or are TOO STUPID to understand how they work.
Either way is bad.
76
75
753
@realDonaldTrump
Who was it that promised that American steel would be used in the Keystone pipeline and is now using Russian steel instead?
39
173
736
@realDonaldTrump
Southern California was struck by a massive earthquake.
I know your attention span is minuscule and your concern for others is microscopic, but maybe you could stop trying to get re-elected for five minutes and actually perform the duties of a President.
71
94
741
@realDonaldTrump
You promised to build a wall and make Mexico pay for it.
Now you’re just replacing old fencing and section of wall via legislation passed during the Obama administration, and Mexico hasn’t paid a dime.
Not quite the promise you made, Donald.
Loser.
33
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720
@realDonaldTrump
24 million Americans are smiling because they will continue to have healthcare. THAT is what matters. Not politics. LIVES.
37
72
727
@realDonaldTrump
I love it when foreign policy is conducted via Twitter, Donald. It’s just the kind of complex negotiations designed for 240 characters…
GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND TURN OFF CABLE NEWS, DUMMY, AND GO DO SOME ACTUAL WORK.
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734
@realDonaldTrump
Last time you left the country, Americans enjoyed a whole week without any ridiculous tweets or offensive comments. Hoping for the same!
40
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702
@SarahHuckabee
@realDonaldTrump
You continue to lie with precision, even now as a private citizen. History will judge you as complicit and collaborative in this time when foreign adversaries attack our elections and Republicans welcomed the interference with open arms and did nothing to protect our country.
12
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720
@realDonaldTrump
You threatened tariffs then quickly rescinded them when Republicans in Congress threatened to stand against you.
You’re not fooling anyone, Donald.
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695
@realDonaldTrump
No one is desperate for a man who is stupid enough to speak about himself in the third person and is so very desperate for attention that he must write nonsense like this.
33
40
704
@realDonaldTrump
We were apparently not watching the same hearings, Donald.
Or perhaps our definitions of “total and complete vindication” differ wildly.
26
89
710
@realDonaldTrump
Great and unmatched wisdom?
This is why you have absolutely no friends, Donald.
Only insufferable loser speak about themselves like this.
16
26
740
@realDonaldTrump
If you want to negotiate with OPEC, Donald, perhaps you could use an official channel rather than trying to get their attention via Twitter.
It’s embarrassing. To both you and the American people.
Also, turn off the goddamn TV. Live-tweeting
@FoxNews
is not part of your job.
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701
@realDonaldTrump
No, sad is a President who fills the front rows of his speeches with people who are paid to laugh and clap in approval.
21
79
738
@realDonaldTrump
This is your fourth “I work hard!” tweet in the last two days.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much, Donald.
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709