Martyn Waites/C B Everett
@MartynWaites
Followers
4,670
Following
891
Media
452
Statuses
32,546
Now writing as C B Everett. Crime writer. Horror writer. Doctor Who for Big Finish. #MDANT and proud of it. Agent: James Wills at
Devon, mainly
Joined August 2008
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
LISA NEW DENTISTE AD
• 93546 Tweets
Broncano
• 59820 Tweets
篠原さん
• 42688 Tweets
篠原恵美さん
• 39586 Tweets
ジュピター
• 29255 Tweets
セーラームーン
• 27680 Tweets
Polaris Dawn
• 25483 Tweets
辞職要求
• 23107 Tweets
声優さんの訃報
• 22753 Tweets
病気療養中
• 21596 Tweets
Delogu
• 21013 Tweets
セーラー戦士
• 17182 Tweets
الذكاء الاصطناعي
• 12769 Tweets
Maiduguri
• 11896 Tweets
@SJ_Watson
Hi. I too am a writer in a movie although I work in a completely dark attic room lit only by a small pool of weak light from my desk lamp. I have a cigarette between my lips which never goes out. I work all night and it’s always night. I never smile because writing is serious.
3
12
389
This hotel room has a free copy of the Book of Mormon! And it’s been personally signed by Mormon Jesus!
1
34
217
In the jungle, the quiet jungle, the gammons sleep tonight ...
6
34
207
I can announce this now! Yeah, it's all about the Fifth Doctor meeting Cicero, but look further down. There's me! Writing for Doctor Who! A dream come true and a labour of love. Feast your ears on it this autumn!
44
23
216
Can we be clear on one thing: only psychopaths and congenital idiots colour coordinate their bookshelves. The correct way is to put writers alongside each other that you think would get on well at a dinner party. Don’t @ me. You know I’m right.
19
8
147
RT and follow to
#Win
1 of 5 dedicated, signed copies of my new novel
#TheOldReligion
in PB. Out today! UK only. Ends 23/02/19.
#crimethriller
with a swirl of
#folkhorror
60
231
139
The master race
i’ve had my morning ruined by this so i’m afraid you must all now suffer the same fate
767
896
4K
25
32
140
Once again
@NicolaSturgeon
shows how the leader of a country should behave. In England we can only look on in envy.
We know this will not solve every problem facing our culture sector, and that more support is needed. But I hope this £10m will be a lifeline for theatres - and also send a signal of how important we believe arts and culture are, not just to our economy, but to our wellbeing too.
474
3K
16K
4
29
133
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present
@HarrogateFest
’s debonair devil may care programming chair, the wonderful
@VaseemKhanUK
!
6
6
128
This sums up Britain in 2020. If a work of art can be perfect then this is perfect.
1
16
123
Funny, I feel the same way about Catholic priests.
12
77
105
Nadine Dorries thinks that Jon Bon Jovi’s full name is Jonathan Bonathan Jovi.
4
20
121
To celebrate publication of
#TheSinner
, I’m giving away 5 copies.
To
#WIN
, just follow and RT. Worldwide. Ends 10/08/19
@ZaffreBooks
@katherinecrime
#crimefiction
25
207
111
The Daily Mail tells women to get rid of books to make them attractive to men. I prefer the wise words of John Waters: “If you go home with someone and they don’t have books, don’t fuck ‘em!”
My fellow human women, aren't you glad we have life coaches to tell us where we're going wrong in love? I knew my copy of Slaughterhouse-Five was putting men off!
58
84
361
7
24
112
Cheer yourself up and watch this.
3
8
96
Confronted this racist piece of shit pushing leaflets through doors in my area. He’s a member of the far right For Britain party. He won’t be back.
14
3
96
To any Americans wondering who Farage is: he's a failed (7 times) MP, sacked from his City job for alcoholism, with a fascist childhood.
8
94
83
Happy 90th birthday to William Shatner, perhaps best known for his role in the 1976 horror movie, The Devil’s Rain.
17
2
79
Not saying it was depressing being back in my home town of Birtley but here's a photo of me in Morrisons.
9
2
79
You know, I’m beginning to suspect that Liz Truss might not be cut out for politics.
3
9
78
Queen are, were and always will be the shittest band ever.
23
7
75
In 2020 I had to stand outside a care home window trying to make myself understood to my dying mother while that smirking cunt Johnson and his chums partied away in the sunshine. I'm beyond angry about this. If he was in front of me now he wouldn't get to walk away.
20
3
74
Well, that might have been the best
@HarrogateFest
so far. So good to meet up with old friends and make new ones after so long on our own. Yes we talked about murder all weekend, but it was also the most life-affirming of experiences.
11
3
75
Sitting stripped to the waist at my desk with my antique fan blowing, thinking I'm Hemingway in Cuba or Greene in Sierra Leone and not Martyn in Exeter.
9
0
69
My schedule for
#TheakstonsCrime
is now up:
Friday:
Bar
Dinner
Bar
Saturday:
Bar
Lunch
Bar
Dinner
Bar
Sunday:
Bar
If anyone needs me.
8
11
68
Oh. Well, I guess it’s real, then. The Sinner, my new novel, is coming in August.
13
11
64
I know I’m wanging on about my new book, THE OLD RELIGION, and there’s more to come, so if you’re sick of hearing it please feel free to mute. But it’s my first original novel under my own name for nearly a decade and I’m rather thrilled about it. So bear with me ...
25
11
62
#ICancelledMyTripToLondon
because they don’t have McDonald’s or Fox News so I would be bored and hungry.
7
6
53
@amandalees
@BettyGranville
A mate of mine actually took a builder up on that. He whistled at her as she walked past so she went onto his building site, up the ladder and joined him on the scaffolding. Told him to come on then, if you're brave enough. He wasn't, surprisingly . . .
2
0
63
This is the equivalent of putting your pyjamas on and doing the dishes while waiting for the last party guest to stop talking and leave.
Ecuador cuts Julian Assange's internet connection at its embassy in London, preventing him from communicating with the outside world
208
393
988
1
9
60
BBC Newswatch couldn't find a single programme that covered the benefits of sawing your own legs off then trying to learn tap dancing.
BBC newswatch couldn't find a single programme that covered potential benefits of Brexit. You are proud of the BBC but it's declined
236
96
180
0
25
58
There ain’t no party like a Four Seasons Total Landscaping party!
4
3
58
@BenPBradshaw
I also feel genuinely upset over the Labour MEPs and yourself. You’re the best MP I’ve had everywhere I’ve lived but the party is rotting from the head down and something needs to be done. Until Corbyn and his hateful acolytes are gone this ont be the Labour Party.
1
1
54
This is horrific. Racists feel emboldened to actually behave like this in public now. Anita - nor anyone - should have to go through this.
8
25
51
Absolutely gutted not to be at this year’s
#TheakstonsCrime
at
#Harrogate
. I was supposed to be there from yesterday until Sunday and doing a couple of events on Saturday. But ill health has stopped me. Can’t say how devastated I am.
31
0
58
This is the best news I've had in ages. Genuinely. Couldn't be happier.
New MD Alternative National Treasures 🏅
@JamesMartinCla1
@westhamster2
@fencepostgod
@MartynWaites
@RichG3230
@AlasdairMcDoug4
@timbatcup
@NickTriani
@ianmulvey
@JayneGrayson5
@RadioFreeBronx
@spaceshipmark
@wanepillow
@PhilMurphy1878
@forehandcourt
@AffrenchFfrench
129
15
287
7
1
59
Amazed anyone in UKIP knows what or where a bookshop is.
Three members of UKIP have been suspended following the attack on socialist bookshop
@Bookmarks_books
over the weekend:
5
86
98
5
18
55
Just keep repeatedly talking to her then when she ignores your creepy advances and walks away call her a fucking lesbian. Dead easy.
0
13
59
Sorting stuff out for the house move today, I found my first acting publicity photo. Haven’t changed a bit.
11
0
57
I've just written a really bloody good chapter in my new book. So now I know there's one really bloody good chapter in my new book.
8
2
55
Never heard of
@andrewlawrence
before today. But now if I want to hear sexist, women-hating, racist far right ranting, I know where to come.
3
11
54
@SarahGPerry
This is Finn. We got him from Battersea after being found on the tube. He was a fireball when we got him, waiting in the hallway to attack us at night, etc. Look at him now. He’s the most gorgeous, affectionate cuddler and we couldn’t imagine life without him.
2
1
54
Here's me doing my best Elvis Costello circa This Year's Model look to talk about my shiny new novel,
#TheOtherPeople
, and my shiny new name, C B Everett!
.
@simonschusterUK
has signed The Other People, a 'brilliant, breathless' thriller by C B Everett, otherwise known as
@MartynWaites
(£)
1
3
6
13
14
55
“My name? … Piss Jugman …”
Piss Jugman is here until 6pm today to teach truckers proper pee disposal. Jugman is "pissed" at all the jugs he's found laying in the parking lot. "Urine trouble" if you don't dispose properly.
Kids can get their picture taken with Piss Jugman for only $5 from 4-6pm today
634
6K
33K
0
12
53
This is the most hilarious thing I’ve seen in ages. Scintillating dialogue, an expert masterclass in prop wrangling and then . . . wait for it . . .
2
23
51
I’ve just finished readin
@spookypurcell
’s latest The Shape of Darkness. Wow. I think it’s her best one yet and that’s saying something. A story or a woman haunted in every way possible, I reckon it’s a future gothic classic.
5
11
49
This is me! And my shiny new name! Massively proud of this book.
Do you love twisty thrillers with a touch of gothic horror?
We're off to
#TheakstonsCrime
and also have this fab cover reveal to share!
Who are the
#TheOtherPeople
?
Forget what you think you know.
@simonschusterUK
@MartynWaites
Art-Pip Watkins
9
20
44
15
13
52
This is the kind of thing that makes you realise there are still some good people in the world. The smile on that little girl’s face. Lovely.
1
10
49
RIP Peter Wyngarde. You made me believe crime writers led such an adventurous and flamboyant life. In your honour today I’ll wear a cravat with my kaftan, drink scotch for breakfast and get into a fistfight with some thugs. And type a few words.
5
16
51
I’ve posted a lot of stuff on here recently about the appalling shit happening in the US and I’ve lost followers as a result. Fine. Those people have shown themselves up for what they are.
#Blacklivesmatter
1
1
48
Thirty four years ago tonight I was watching Bruce Springsteen at St James Park, Newcastle. It's still one of the best gigs I've ever been to - or ever will go to - and can still remember the set list. Glory days indeed.
10
3
49
@BenPBradshaw
I voted Green but with a heavy heart, Ben, as a lifelong Labour voter and sometime member. And I will continue to do so, I’m afraid. I don’t recognise this Labour Party any more.
5
1
49
@mrjamesob
But they won't take any action. Because they'll be cut off from Downing Street if there's any backlash. Or doing their jobs, as we used to call it.
3
1
42
My news! I can finally announce this! Massively excited to be doing this.
Stop press! Have you seen the news?
#QuayWords
has a new writer-in-residence. We are thrilled to announce that acclaimed crime writer
@MartynWaites
is our first ever digital writer-in-residence 🎉.Find out more and book your place for his first event, here
0
4
14
17
5
49
I can finally mention this! Three more stories featuring the brilliant Fifth Doctor and companions, one by
@ak_benedict
, one by
@sarahrward1
and one by me! This is one of the most exciting things I’ve ever written because I get to say ... EXTERMINATE!
Many happy returns for the Fifth Doctor! What better birthday gift than a new
#DoctorWho
box set?! 🎁🎂 Click here: to pre-order The Lost Resort and Other Stories NOW!
13
34
333
12
5
49
As his prison bitch?
4
9
45
It’s time for my TV event of the week: The Rivals Of Sherlock Holmes on
@TalkingPicsTV
. Yeah, I could watch the whole thing on a box set but I like waiting for it and looking forward to it every Sunday. Like people used to do in olden times.
2
1
46
I have known Lady (Susan) Hussey since I was 18. She is definitely not a racist. When she first heard my geordie accent she sang the whole of ‘You shall have a fishie on a little dishie to me’ at full volume.
0
4
47
Thor’s a Norse deity you fuckwitted gibberish bladder on a stick.
If you follow this to its logical conclusion, only a drug addict can play a drug addict, only boxer can play a boxer, only an actual Greek deity can play Thor. The world just got a tiny bit more stupid.
487
216
925
2
6
44
You craven snivelling cowardly shit,
@BorisJohnson
. Go fuck yourself and your failed government.
2
7
44
So the choice is between Johnson and Corbyn. Which is like being asked if you prefer the electric chair or a lethal injection.
6
3
43
Have to say,
@Valancourt_B
are knocking it out of the park with their Monster She Wrote series. Beautiful to look at, wonderful to read.
1
7
44
There really is a tweet for every occasion. Every fucking occasion.
Crooked Hillary said that I want guns brought into the school classroom. Wrong!
6K
28K
36K
1
23
40
I’ve just eaten the first tomatoes I’ve ever grown in my life. Quite an emotional moment.
5
0
43
I am beyond excited about everyone getting to hear this at last! I couldn’t be more proud of anything I’ve ever done. Brilliant team, brilliant cast, brilliant production.
OUT NOW: Peter Davison in 'Doctor Who: Interstitial / Feast of Fear'
@bigfinish
@jfmouthonlegs
@MartynWaites
@carl_rowens
#doctorwho
#bigfinish
#fifthdoctor
0
9
50
6
5
41
Wish the bear had ripped this cockless cunt to pieces then posted a selfie smiling over his dismembered remains. That would have been an “awesome stalk”. Next time.
Alright folks, here is my Mountain Grizzly! We put an awesome stalk on him but he spotted us at about 75 yards. Instead of taking off he turned and came right at us. It was very easy to tell this boar owned the valley we were hunting in and wasn’t scared of anything! When he…
20K
396
3K
2
8
40
Here's me,
@MarkBillingham
and Simon Kimmel at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville for John Prine's 70th birthday gig. What a wonderful night. So, so sad to hear about his death.
4
3
41
Strong "He's put my stapler inside the jelly again" energy here.
Every night of this campaign, my election posters have been stolen, taken down, vandalised, or destroyed.
This is a clear attack on our democracy, but voters in Welwyn Hatfield will not be intimidated by these tactics.
We won't be discouraged by these undemocratic actions from
5K
341
2K
0
6
41
Fucking hell. The Tories had more Christmas parties last year than The Fall had bassists.
2
5
39
Today’s book post and I am so excited by this. Mick Herron is one of the best British writers currently operating and a new novel from him is always a cause for joy. If you’ve not read him, remedy that now. You can thank me later.
3
4
41
Fantastic. This is one of the greatest British crime dramas of all time. Can't wait.
7
3
39
It’s at this time of year that all Doctor Who fans must spare a thought for those less fortunate than ourselves. Yes, I’m taking about Ian Levine.
4
11
38
@JackPosobiec
Poor soul. Were those nasty actors mean to lovely Mike? Bless you special little snowflake heart.
1
2
37
It would take a heart of stone not to laugh.
‘If I have to get a lawyer, I will’: Trump voter upset the border wall will put her house on Mexico side
239
366
420
0
28
37
Always been proud to be a Geordie, but rarely more so than today. Wish I could be there.
#NewcastleUnites
to kick out the Pergida fascists.
1
22
37
This is abhorrent. It’s. Is more difficult to find positive signs of policing than negative ones. Everyday racism. And they either can’t or won’t see it.
4
15
37
Woken up with a strong urge to have chips for breakfast. I know you can break the rules at Christmas but does the run up to Christmas count?
And for any Americans reading, chips means chips. Not crisps. Just to clear that up.
14
1
37
Going to Newcastle to see my oldest friend. Thinking fondly of her mother who died a year ago. She always called Ming vases Minge vases and no one ever had the heart to tell her.
0
6
35
@PhilipNByrne
“This town will not negotiate with terrorists. Is there a town near here that will?”
0
0
37
Dunno about you, but that's my perfect writing position.
8
6
38
Never mind about reopening the schools, when are they opening the barbers?
8
1
38
So proud of my brilliant nerd wife. At the forefront of the British horror revival!
‘Bloody thrilled’ to have been interviewed by
@davidmbarnett
about the British horror revival for The Observer
@guardian
🧛♀️🔪🩸🧟♂️
I could’ve written a (terrible because not a writer) book about the subject
4
5
33
1
2
37
The fucking state of this.
Pres Trump declined to answer questions at the end of the announcement. Was asked to reflect on the legacy of Sen. McCain, but declined. Sat silent and cross-armed as press pool herded out of the Oval Office.
4K
5K
10K
5
8
37
@LiamWhy53455121
@BelfastAgmt
Yeah. Good job she’s not the Foreign Secretary, or something. Then she might make herself look like some semi-literate over-promoted moron.
0
0
35
@richardosman
That would be genuinely brilliant. I’ve managed to mention Homes Under The Hammer in just about every novel for the last fifteen years. It doesn’t get the appreciation it deserves.
1
0
37
Every time I see Liz Truss I always imagine a Cabinet meeting where the rest of them are sitting around with reports in front of them and she's been given some colouring in to do.
2
15
35
Not saying there’s no BAME representation on this list, there aren’t even any brunettes.
3
16
34
Undoubtedly the best adaptation of Wyndham’s book by several miles. And likely to remain so. Might be time for a rewatch.
#OnThisDay
1981: The television adaptation of The Day of the Triffids was first broadcast.
Pictured are Emma Relph as Jo Playton, John Duttine as Bill Masen and a Triffid as itself.
47
123
479
9
10
34
I was in Lithuania just after they split from the Soviet Union. They pulled down all the Communist statues and looked for replacements more representative of who they now were. They came up with, of course, Frank Zappa. Here it is:
5
7
35
I absolutely LOVE what Dom has done with this cover! Coming in February! Shall I get this as my next tattoo?
New work tweet. The Old Religion by
@MartynWaites
for
@BonnierZaffre
@Lexiesox
. I really enjoyed working on this one! Crime thriller with a creepy edge.
#bookcoverdesign
#crowskull
#theoldreligion
0
8
13
11
10
34
Made a pilgrimage to Bloomsbury. Obviously because we’re both big fans of the Inland Waterways Association.
3
0
35