Martin Amini
@MartinAmini
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Pinned Tweet
I tried my best to find Julia a Good Match in Kansas City 🤣
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When I was in 9th grade I got caught selling weed. My mom was devastated. So she transferred me to a rich private school thinking that was gonna help the situation, but in reality she gave me a promotion
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home girl pulled up to the show single, and left the show boo'ed up 😭
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when you meet someone from southeast dc, they will check you fast 😂
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dennis rodman: "I'm going to vegas, i'll be back in 48 hours"
Jordan:
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this is what it feels like growing up mixed in the DMV 😂
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when i turned 16, my dad bought me an ice cream truck. He was like "if we're gonna buy you a car, we might as well make a profit"
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here's a new stand up clip explaining why i'm not mad at all racists
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Here's a story about getting robbed in Bethesda Maryland
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here's a new stand up clip discussing why we have a longggg way to go in the latin community when it comes to mental health
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due to less air pollution, this is what georgia avenue looks like now
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i just tried to explain what toxic masculinity is to my 65 year old Iranian dad, and he just called me gay
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Here's a video of me attempting to make white friends at my show 😂
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saw WWIII trending and messaged my dad whose in Iran right now if he's okay and he replied with this
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when i found out "Enrique Terrio" was the leader of the Proud Boys
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2 of the most slept on ice cream: Choco Taco and WWF Ice Cream Bar
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here's a stand up clip of me attempting to make white friends at a show 😆
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ahmad rashad: "do you have a gambling problem?"
MJ: "I don't see what your talking about"
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my homie just got dumped while in quarantine. They still live together tho 😂😂
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i'm about to perform at the Bethesda Country Club. I grew up selling ice cream to these folks. Now i'm getting paid to make fun of them. Life's wild
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here's a new stand up clip explaining what it's like having an immigrant dad
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Trader Joe Employee: Aye bro, I recognize you from somewhere.
me: yeah, you might have seen one of my videos online, i'm a comedian.
Trader Joe's Employee: Nah, you use to play ball at sligo creek. We called you "Osama Bin Martin."
me: yeah, i remember that
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here's a stand up clip explaining the different levels of "white"
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you can now watch my new stand up comedy special "Son of An Ice Cream Man" free
WATCH HERE:
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me: any spots on the show tonight?
comedy booker: sorry, we already have enough latino comics
me: what about "something else?"
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this is what it feels like doing open mics in LA the past 4 months
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if trump wins again, i'm not paying taxes for the next 4 years. And when the IRS comes after me, i'm gonna tell them "i'm just being presidential"
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here's a stand up clip of me attempting to make white friends at my show 😆
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my dads name was Forooz Amini before 9/11. The next day he made us call him Fred. I'm like "we can't even call you dad?" He was like "not in public" 😂😂
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here's a video of me explaining why DMX is in a category of his own 🐐
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driving around my neighborhood yelling at ppl "Y'ALL ESSENTIAL?!"
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who would of thought drug dealers would be the only ones w/ job security in 2020 smh
BREAKING: US weekly jobless claims total 6.6 million, vs 3.1 million expected
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here's a new stand up clip on why i'm gonna miss Bernie Sanders
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here's a stand up clip discussing the first time I got robbed 😂
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I decided it's time to move back to LA. Thank you DC for everything. The past 18 months has been the most challenging of my life, but i feel like it prepared me for what's next. I'm doing a farewell show October 6th at The DC Improv. I hope I can see everyone there. Love y'all ✌🏽
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My new comedy special just hit 10,000 views this morning. You can watch the whole thing on youtube for free. Spread the word 🗣
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rest in peace to DMX, one of my favorite artists of all time. You will always be remembered and your impact won't be forgotten.
#RIPDMX
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you think we'll have PTSD when dapping ppl up after this?
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Last night was a dream come true. Sold out my headlining debut at The Kennedy Center. Thank you to everyone who made it a special night. Let's keep Overachieving in 2020 🏆
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here's a stand up clip discussing why we have a longgggg way to go in the latin community when it's comes to mental health
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here's a video of me explaining the different levels of "white"
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the coronavirus sounds like something my uncle made up to get me to stop drinking his beers
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here's a new stand up clip about my immigrant dad on Instagram. Who else got parents like this? 😂
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stop chasing love in a pandemic.. MF's out here mentally unstable 😂
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here's a new stand up clip on what it feels like being a Redskins fan
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i wanna wish my brother
@boknowsdjing
a happy birthday today. We met back in 7th grade when he arrived from Cameroon. He was an innocent kid with dreams of becoming a doctor. I convinced him that he can earn more money being a DJ, and he still blames me til this day for it
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if you never got a shoe thrown at you by your mom, we ain't cut from the same cloth
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homie walked into the show single and left with a gym baddie 😭
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latinos really out here stealing white peoples jobs 😂😂😂
when you find out the leader of the Proud Boys name is Enrique Tarrio
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Thank you DC, we sold out 3 shows at The Lincoln Theater! I can't wait to drop this new special 🔥
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me: hey mom, i think i got ADHD
mom: nah, you just ain't shit
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this clip went viral on IG and Tiktok last week and now all the cities on my tour are selling out 😭
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watch the full video on youtube here:
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Maryland weather be like "oh you ain't sick yet, hold up real quick"
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12 months ago I opened up my own comedy club called Room 808 in DC. It's been a dream come true being able to showcase local talent from the DMV. Every Wednesday we do Free Shows and give out Free pizza. Please RT this to spread the word ✌🏽 for tickets
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i went from chasing my dreams in LA to moving back in with my parents all b/c someone in china ate a bat. 2020 funny as shit 😂
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This was Wild to witness in person 😭
A girl had a seizure at one of my shows and she was the best sport about to 🥹🥰
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i swear i only post on IG stories to see if my crush watches it
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here's a stand up clip discussing why we have a long way to go in the latin community when it comes to mental health
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just won a rap battle in a trader joe's parking lot. things are looking up
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Check out my new comedy special "i'm not broke anymore" on youtube.
Here's the link:
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i was working out in my front yard today.. and my uncle tried to school us 😂
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i wrote this about the muslim ban back in 2017 while my dad was in Iran
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