jordan. 🦂 💀 💕
@MarchingWith7
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the past it hurts but the future aint got nothin to do with you 🫶 she/her
Joined February 2020
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The vibes have been horrendous here lately so I'll be spending a lot more time at the other place moving forward
I may come back but no promises haha 🤘
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Joe Jonas was tired of asking Sophie Turner for uppies, TMZ reports
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The people buying fake vaccination cards are the same ones who would hide a zombie bite in an apocalypse movie
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Male birth control DOES exist, it's called having a podcast
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Cancel me for this but
If a Soldier is ~this~ vulnerable to disinfo campaigns that they'll refuse a mandatory & life-saving vaccine despite deliberate, concerted info efforts from their COC...They're a security threat.
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How many combat deployments did the MN NG get activated for between 1981 and 2005 lmao
Some of yall know fuckall about the Guard or the time before GWOT my GOD
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Everyone non mil person that I know keeps acting so shocked at how young these Russian POWs look, and it's bringing me back to a conversation I see on here every few months: we need to cast age-accurate actors to play servicemembers. None of this SPC in his mid-30s stuff
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Cancel me for this but I think this is a much cooler way to remember your service than to sit on the internet and complain about tanks, ponytails, and pronouns
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None of these women seem to let their ponytails and braids hinder their ability to kill ISIS militants.
But go on
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We can't do CBD in the military to manage pain and anxiety because DrUgS bAd,
but as an organization we all get a late work call tomorrow because we're cool with everyone binge drinking for a football game 🥴
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Look, before I start this thread let me put it on the table that this thread is for me, not you.
The latest news of Vanessa Guillen is pulling up some feelings that I'd like to process!
I also would like to note that my experience and career in the Army is AGGRESSIVELY average.
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@mtracey
Probably all of the Americans who live there already idk
Are you a journalist? Lol
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Happy Father's Day to all of you who don't have someone to call today, I'm your dad now.
Stop messing with the thermostat. When was the last time you got your oil changed? I watched the most interesting documentary on WW2 the other day. Ok love you bye 🩷
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Guys I'll never argue that I'm the best commander out there, but extremism is a corrosive to our armed forces & we need to start having these conversations with our people.
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Today an internet man said I was ugly and have shitty opinions, and instead of quote tweeting him or engaging at all. I just blocked him & everyone who liked his comment.
Everyone say good job, Jordan
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We don't know if we're pregnant at 6 weeks and IUDs are prohibitively expensive and birth control requires multiple doctor visits and condoms aren't free and doctors won't tie your tunes until you've had kids and birth controls fail and health insurance isn't free and
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Starting off first dates by asking "besides work, how long would it take someone to realize you died in your apartment" to determine if they have their own friend group and/or hobbies
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I'm gonna need China to stop making the Navy look cool
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Me to my civilian friends who have dumb fuck takes about what's happening in Ukraine:
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I was going to go to sleep but instead I decided to stay awake and cyberbully a coffee company that likes white nationalists
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Aggressive "I would have punched that drill sergeant in the face if I'd joined" energy lmaooo
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One thing I was not prepared to learn at Basic Training was the vastly different standards for personal hygiene that grown adults had
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You're just never going to convince me that Chaplain-led invocations and benedictions at [otherwise nonreligious] mandated unit events are anything other than inappropriate
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It was "bring your puppy to work so the commander can pet some doggos" day
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My kingdom for an Army think-tank that would mandate having a junior Soldier or leader in the back of the room whose sole purpose is to raise their hand and identify huge problems with the big-picture stuff they're working on.
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Like what about disinfo campaigns from real threats like China, Russia, etc?
You're vulnerable to the FB MLM lizard-people-and-tinfoil-hat brigade but you want to sit in on SECRET briefings?
Absolutely fucking not.
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To the guy that scoffed at my Raspberry Sour order,
my beers are 8.7% ABV vs your Bud Light 5%, but they're the same price?
So who's winning?????
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Maybe some military spouses wouldn't center part of their identity around their servicemember's rank & career if we actually did a good job enabling them to have full-fledged careers and comprehensive support systems instead of uprooting and isolating them every 3-4 years
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I'm just a girl, standing in front of a PT formation, realizing [yet again] that the body scrub I used last night has sparkles in it
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(If you think the contents of the Fort Hood report aren't happening at every installation, in every unit, in every military branch,
you are a willfully ignorant naive dumbFUCK)
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People forget that preGWOT the NG was actually designed to primarily focus on DOMESTIC needs, not to augment compo 1's deployment cycle
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Disappointed but not surprised that an organization is floating the idea of canceling ALL holiday block leave, but in the same breath they've put an emphasis on suicide prevention training.
Like, my dude.
Read the room.
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People will ask why women don't come forward about SA & SH but this happened to a world famous professional athlete on a worldwide broadcast with millions of witnesses and she's still being called a liar
The Spanish football federation announces that, instead of removing president Luis Rubiales, they will take legal action against player Jenni Hermoso as they claim she ‘lied’ about non-consensual kiss.
The federation also says players have an “obligation” to play for the
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"Well Jordan I bet you'd change your tune if we moved the refugees to YOUR town"
Dude, they in-process across the street from my office. Bring them all. Save their lives. Be a good American.
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So what happens when a law abiding gun owner kills a DHS agent in self defense because they think they're being kidnapped?
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Easy.
I dare you to find a more effective and reliable piece of government furnished equipment. I double dog dare you.
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Every day that I have to tape a woman with a visible 6 pack is a day that I get to experience the distinct rage that only comes with everyone acknowledging there's a problem and senior leaders refusing to implement common sense changes to fix it 🙂
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I'm always curious why the men who whine about "they lowered the standards to push women through Ranger school" haven't just...taken advantage of these LoWeReD sTaNdArDs to go get their own tab.
Tabless, loud, and wrong on the Lord's internet. Please, pick a struggle.
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Somewhere out there is a woman in the Army who posted a photo of herself in nice shoes and her dress uniform.
Maybe she posted it after a military ball. Maybe she posted it because she just liked the way she looked and wanted to commemorate a part of her military service.
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I love Kevin Costner but I have to say it.
Tombstone is better than Wyatt Earp.
Val Kilmer is a better Doc Holliday, Sam Elliot is in it, and Kurt Russell is fantastic.
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Idk man I've seen FSC commanders get relieved over fucking up fuel missions but I've never seen anyone in AG or Finance get fired for fucking up someone's records or pay
Maybe we should start holding people accountable for fucking up at their jobs, regardless of the branch
Dozens of military doctors and dentists preparing for retirement owe at least three more years of service because of record-keeping errors, the Navy say.
It's the second time in a week that officials have publicly admitted to discovering oversights.
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President Biden really missed a golden opportunity to name his new dog Brandon
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People are mad at the idea that someone would wear swag from a unit they didn't serve in, because of course they are
Idk man I've bought unit tees hoodies and hats for my family from nearly every unit I've been assigned to, is it stolen valor for them to wear it???
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Seeing senior leaders posting about "No OnE sHoUlD wOrK pAsT 1700" is interesting because uhh
Who do you think is creating requirements that keep subordinate units in the workplace after 1700?
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Anyway if my online training has taught me anything, it's kind of an indicator of an inside threat that two individuals with access to sensitive information have been anonymously running a large online disinfo campaign against the very Department of Defense that employs them
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If body composition was about the overall health of a Soldier it would be managed by healthcare professionals instead of an NCO you appointed from your orderly room.
It would be tracked in MEDPROS by your PCM, not an administrative action managed by your training NCO/cmd team
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@mack_a_d00
"Skating" lmao
Do you think people in the guard in the 80s and 90s got to dictate where and when their units deployed overseas?
Not til GWOT did we see rampant use of compo 2&3 for this
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1. The ACFT isn't an official system of record yet
2. The people who would benefit the most from gym time are ones with scores lower than 60 in each event
3. Who tf is enforcing this?
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The fascinating thing about
#miltwitter
is approximately 50% of it is people I follow for mentorship, to expand my knowledge, and to see different perspectives on issues that affect the military.
The other 50% are depressed horny alcoholics with unhealthy coping mechanisms
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An Army installation named after the traitor COL Lee being renamed after not one but two African American logistics leaders?
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AR 25-50 requires servicemembers to remove passive voice from all correspondence, opting instead for active voice to communicate succinctly.
An example of passive voice is
"There has been confusion on an issue..."
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Good morning to refrigerator bodied women who left the house before sunrise and refrigerator bodied women only
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And YES I know there are SPCs in their mid 30s currently serving but GENERALLY they are 18-25
And there might be merit in having civilians sit with the reality that the majority of our enlisted and junior officer ranks are filled with people who look like their kids
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So uhhh
Are servicemembers going to be able to request compassionate reassignment out of Texas duty stations if they have trans kids?
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I'm just a girl, standing in front of a country that doesn't revolve around the agriculture industry anymore, asking why we're still doing Daylight Savings Time
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How much of a dork do you have to be to describe Waffle House as "not for the faint of heart" 😂
It's a restaurant, not Fallujah in 2006
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My mentions were a dumpster fire for DAYS over an alleged abrupt retirement (lol), but crickets about this
Neat. 😎👉👉
Trump: When we gave her the Presidential Medal of Freedom… It’s the equivalent of the Congressional Medal of Honor— it’s actually much better because everyone who gets the Congressional Medal, they’re soldiers. They’re either in very bad shape because they’ve been hit so many
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Whoever decided to incorporate these into women's fashion deserves to be yeeted into the sun
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Favorite thing I've seen so far is these two talking to the Marines at the recruiting booth
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One of my former platoon sergeants called me a commie on Facebook today.
America's having a normal one this week.
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Listen I understand dates and timelines aren't everyone's strong suit, but tell me how a person abandoned their unit before they even got orders to deploy
I'll wait
- May 2005, Tim Walz retires from the National Guard
- July 2005, his unit receives alert orders for deployment
- September 2005, unit goes to Camp Shelby to prepare for deployment
- March 2006, unit deploys
w/
@jeremyherb
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What if
WHAT. IF.
you just did your Height/Weight at your annual PHA appointment with your primary care manager
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What if
WHAT IF
veterans who served honorably for however long they were in the military just...
took up farming, or underwater basket weaving, or
literally ANY job that isn't being an elected official
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Trying to explain to someone who's never been in the military why we still do 24 hour duty when we're in America without sounding insane challenge
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Terrible people on this app keep using SA cases as arguments to keep women out of the force,
as if combat arms men haven't been getting assaulted by their battle buddies for literal decades under the guise of hazing and unit initiation.
Segregation isn't going to root this out.
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Went to my first Catholic service in like a decade
You're never going to convince me to say "and with your spirit" instead of "and also with you"
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Declaring independence from whatever the fuck this is was the right thing to do
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The most unrealistic part of Independence Day is a staff MAJ possessing the marksmanship skills to shoot a Coke can from 300ft away on the first try
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The Venn diagram of men who glorify Viking culture for being brutal and barbaric, and the men who get squeamish around period blood is a circle.
They're weak and their children will not survive the winter.
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Being a retired whatever-the-rank and still having that title on your business cards & having people at work use that title towards you gives me "25 yr old who still wears their letterman jacket" vibes.
I will not apologize.
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The Chaplain Corps should not be the bandaid for inadequate, incomplete, and inaccessible mental health care
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I frankly don't understand why we aren't treating a missing Soldier with the same level of intensity and involvement as when Joe loses his NODs.
Whole BCTs have shut down training to do hands across NTC for a radio but we can't be bothered to do that for a human being?
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I failed Air Assault school FOUR TIMES (leave me alone, I can't jump high) and was told I couldn't be seen as a good leader in the 101st.
Made CPT, crushed a rotational deployment, & now I'm a commander.
Cadets & baby LTs, you'll be fiiine.
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I was today years old when I learned the difference between Tollywood and Bollywood
Also RRR is dope
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If you talk to any woman who is serving or has served I'm 100% certain she's got stories of harassment or assault from her time, from her battle buddies.
Please, be kind.
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How many leg tucks do you think Tucker Carlson can do
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If you're chairing a meeting and waiting for questions before you click to the next slide, do not
DO NOT
say "well, silence implies consent" and click forward
Like
Jesus fucking Christ
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Are you actually attracted to men with beards or do you just like a visual reassurance that they're not in the military
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It's so interesting to me that a lot of straight men describing their ideal partner are actually just describing a mom they can get naked with
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On my hands and knees begging y'all not to do this.
Especially if you're a supervisor/boss or significant other.
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Me, describing a Bradley to someone who isn't in the Army: "Okay so it's like a tank but it's not a tank. It's smaller. Like a baby tank, idk. The infantry uses them"
Them: "So it's like a Tank-lette"
Me: "...yes"
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Some of you didn't grow up in a household where you watched one parent sideline all their career aspirations for their servicemember spouse and it SHOWS.
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Ok what's the East Coast obsession with Wawa?
Have y'all never seen a Buccee's???
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I don't intend to tweet again about the vaccine or COVID or why all of this is so stupid and preventable because honestly at this point it feels like this:
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It's almost like we could have these standards across the force without a decrease in readiness
Almost
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The past 2 weeks on Twitter have rendered OnlyFans totally obsolete.
Why pay for an OF subscription when senior leaders are lining up to show their asses on the tl for free?
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We joke about women stealing men's hoodies after hooking up, but why hasn't some enterprising woman made the jump to stealing MOLLE pouches so she can clear CIF
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Unfriendly reminder that Wilmer Valderrama dated Demi Lovato when he was 29 and they were 17
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Maaan I tell you HWHAT if you're a Soldier who's been "fucking around" with not wearing a mask and not being vaccinated, I sincerely hope you "find out" the consequences of what happens when a leader performs an integrity violation.
Still an Army value, last time I checked
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