Lewis
@LewisElli0t
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A canny even get decent WIFI in ma house never mind in a coffin 6ft under good effort mj son
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Imagine findin out aboot music, u n yer da in a cave an he starts tapping th wall n ur hinking absolute anthem keep the rave alive da
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£320 to look like you've been pulled oot the sea wi a baggy net hahaha
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Scottish folk shud get a say whit happens wae Twitter cos we run the hing anyway lit fuck off wae yer love hearts it's no bebo ya mongos
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Tango ice blast prices
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Why do bouncers no accept YoungScot cards n expect u to bring out a passport like nae hassle mate al b out nxt Sat wi ma boardin pass anaw x
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Apparently we aw have that 1 mongo pal but adamant aw ma pals are mongos
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Hink the army's scrapped boots n went for pairs a superstars for afghan away
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@AppleSupport
i was just wondering how you get rid of the padlock icon at the top right of the screen?
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Dunno what's worse those android emojis or the fact she's trying to cook a few eccies
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When you get a blue sc
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There needs to be an app cawd 'GaffFinder' or suhin cos house parties are are aboot extinct
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Get the fear when ur on someone's insta and you see a photo you've liked and dunno if you done it ages ago or 1 min ago
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Hearing 'fajitas for tea' makes everythin sound. Sunday Hangover? Fajitas cures that. Lose a leg? Fajitas mate. Roberts injured? Fajitas
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If you find a song on soundcloud that has a young team staring at you with a couple a bottles of wine it's probably gonna be an anthem
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What's the difference between Titanic and your servers? The Titanic only went down once.
@EASPORTSFIFA
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Never understood how folk could be arsed to take violins to school everyday like if am honest a couldni be arsed to take masel most days
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If T in the Park did a soundcloud tent it would be the best hing ever. Loads a Mongols in a tent enjoying the remixes
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Ever try bite that little bit a skin off yer lip n before u know it you've ended up ripping ur whole face off
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Here's an inspirational yearbook quote for folk sitting exams this year
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When you first walk into the exam hall and make eye contact with an invigilator
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Yer da doesny turn on his iMessage cos the texts r blue n he's a Fenian bastard n hates the Huns
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It's actual mad how Scottish people run Twitter but dinny have the power to run their own country
#StillAYE
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Got to laugh when the English mention 'Haggis' or 'Kilts' in an insult. Aye mate me and big Rabbie Burns are pure offended
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Hate when folk hold the door open for u when yer 3 miles away n you have to run like a decrepit just leave it mate a can open a door masel
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When ur trying to tell a story to yer pals on the groupchat on a Sunday morning when yer still steaming
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Closest a got to revising at school was taking jotters oot ma bag to put drink in to take to someone's gaff
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When ur getting a pure dyno photo and ur maw shouts that your tea is ready
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Fucking hell there was a better atmosphere at my Maths exam than there was at Celtic Park tonight
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Canny believe I accidentally wished ma mum Happy Mother's Day in person instead of a picture or a massive paragraph on social media
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When you feel the need to post on instagram before sticking yer coupon oan
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Just break yer ankle n you get a free one with a set ae crutches x
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The biggest regret of a life is probably liking 18383919 pages on Facebook when a was 12 x
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Tomato Sauce with Christmas dinner is 100% not on and never will be
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Nae point having cupboards in ma kitchen cos there's never ever been decent scran in ma hoose since about 2003
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Just when you thought Facebook couldni get any worse n then they decide to add android emojis to messenger
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Cunts who call 'Nike' 'Nikey' are the people yer parents told you to stay away fae when you were younger
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Judge asks 9/11 victims if they tried 'Respawning back in'
Judge asks rape victim if she tried 'closing her legs'
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When you really dinny fancy school/college n hope your maw doesn't see you
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2 words, disgust in!! Trying to enjoy my holiday by the pool and I feel targeted🤬 Fellow Bhoys give this rt !!🇨🇮🇨🇮
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Since girls canny understand whats so special aboot Leicester winning the Premier League, its like
@ScottGShore
becoming Prime Minister
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See when am trying to decide what emojis to use a can feel ma face dain the expression as am choosing them
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Hate when a find an absolute banger of a tune and play the fuck oot it for 3 days and then despise it forever
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