Mwendwa
@Kelvinmwendwa__
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|| Data First || Future Tech bro ||#PlayKE music ambassador
Kenya
Joined September 2019
By the way, for those who ever secured remote jobs outside of Kenya, probably in the EU, USA, etc., please share the sites you used and any tips or tricks for landing one.
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Going to work with a fully charged phone na kurudi ikiwa 80% means the day was tough. Kutumika kama pundaaaa.
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Someone just walked to the altar at Holy Family Basilica and started chanting to reject the Finance Bill and people joined him. Beautiful scenes. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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Someone to share that video,of the Coasterian kid who told Uhunye,'calm down,usijali nko na wewe'.
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My first Kikuyu burial and I was shocked it took exactly 3hrs kumaliza. Ukambani tunakuaga hadi na picha za aunties, uncles, chamas, gossip groups, etc.
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It's 7:45 am here in Juja. No single SuperMetro bus in sight, but kuna line kubwa. On the right side are Lopha and Eastleigh Sacco buses, wamehire like 5 kamageras kuimbia but no one anataka kuingia. The factor here is orderliness. Very important
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I've been checking bei za masters na maan. Jkuat zinachezea 600k hivi. UON kitu 800k. Strathmore 1.2M. One of my lecturers told me that he did his masters na 250k like 7yrs ago na sahii the same masters ni 550k UON. Ni gari tutasavia au ni masters jameni. Sieet.
Street smart is more of luck than smartness. I’d advice young people to embrace books,Get that a masters degree if you can.
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A police car with number plates concealed? Huu ni ukora jameni
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The last time I hosted my campus squad was in Feb last year 😅. It was in a bedsitter somewhere, & we were all applying for jobs. This weekend, I've hosted them again to toast to our growth😁. Some are now at the UN, PWC, law firms, & others in startups. I'm really proud of them.
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Nikibuy gari weekends itakuaga kutembea tu. Hii weekend niko Nanyuki, the other niko Namanga, the other niko Ololokwe.
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Btw watu uweza aje kuacha soda? Mimi ilinishinda kabisa. I try to go three days napita karibu na duka kiu ya Fanta Orange inanigonga.
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Can someone tell me why organizations refuse to pay people who have grown with them good money, but when those people leave, they bring in others with the same skill set and level, yet pay them even 1.5 times more than what the previous employee was earning?.
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Client: How much would you charge for this. Me: 20k would do. 1 hour later. Client: Nimepata mtu wa 5k. Majamaa kwani mko njaa aje huku nje buana. Waah.
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It's been many months since I finished na bado niko kwa allowance ya campus. My dad told me "Kaa huko utafute opportunities na usikue na pressure. Take your time and the end of it itajipa. And whenever you make an application, forget about it & go to the next one." God bless him.
Hamkuniambia once you're done with school , your folks don't give you money anymore !!!😭.
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Today's date is 06.12.24. It's interesting because each part of the date (day, month, and year) is double the previous one.
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Someone told me vile aliset up Wines and Spirits, akaajiri mtu. Jioni alikua anakuja anapata sales kidogo sana compared to Sunday akiamua kuuza mwenyewe. He secretly decided to set up CCTVs only to note that his employee alikua anauza na handwritten receipts then anarestock jioni.
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I had an interview today. A panel of 3 people in a boardroom. They told me to analyse data, visualize it, and write a report as they watched 😭 1.5hrs. I finished successfully, and they were impressed. Shida stages za recruitment ni mia buana 😂.
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I remember watching Jicho Pevu episodes on Wanugu na kina Matheri and how Seroney hunted them with Amina Chutee, who, after things got worse, fled the country. I'm glad to see they both grew old wakiwa wazima
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New techies, don't expect to buy that car in a year. Don't expect to get first job & be paid 200k. Kuna lucky ones, but for entry level, tech career pay is similar to other fields. Mostly in Kenya, employers will offer 50k to 100k. Tone down expectations to avoid disappointments.
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My aunt was in her element when she did this song 🤌 It's almost 20 years old, but still one of the best Catholic songs produced. Song: Moyo Wangu Wamtukuza Bwana.Composer: Sister Dr Bibiana Ngundo
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6 months ago I got into @moringaschool with no prior coding experience at all. Got to learn Javascript, ReactJs & Ruby on Rails. Today is the last day. Just finished presenting our project [ ]. A site that you can use to compare product from different 🧵🧵
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When anyone is arrested, when tweeting please sign off with either UG or KE. Same script in both countries. Smh.
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Kuna people who work part-time in remote staffing companies za USA/ Europe(mostly healthcare) by using Ms Excel/ HR software. Pay is btn $5 - $15 hourly & worktime 4hrs a day, for part-time employees. All they say is someone referred them. Anyone with those connections, kindly?😅.
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Just noted something. People keep on arguing that fathers providing doesn't really mean fathers are present in their kids life. But when asked to prove presence, all people do is post screenshots of father providing. Interesting.
Present father thread.🙋🏽♀️.
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My dear sister, if he is into tech, then marry him. Tech bros never have women. Kazi ni computers tu. And they're very loyal and caring. Signed.
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This is a candle for the person I was talking about in this tweet. A candle for the recruiter who gave me a chance to launch my data career. I am forever indebted to you. Go well, Faith Kenyanjui. We will dearly miss you 🕊 🕊
This is me. All I knew was software stuff, but I wanted to get into data. Nilikua tu na knowledge ya degree. Did several applications hoping I land a data one before software. It worked. Someone saw my CV akanambia we will give you a chance we train you. No interview at all.
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Ukiona Start up unaworkia imeanza kuhire tens of people every month (and not replacement), and CEO is all over talking about scaling up, anza kutafuta exit plan before mambo yageuke mrushwe nje in hundreds.
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Fintechs be like: We're introducing a technology to retailers, where if a customer pays through mobile money (Mpesa), instead of receiving the funds in Mpesa, they're deposited into another wallet. To withdraw, you send it back to Mpesa and withdraw through agent. Brilliant!.
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Hii SuperMetro wameeka rnb na some dim lights na hii jam yote. Karibu tufall in love na huyu dem tumekaa pamoja. Wueeh.
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I have seen this article somewhere. Plagiarism with no acknowledgement isn't a good thing.
I am always fascinated by these trading centres in rural areas. A centre with a handful of businesses but sustains the entire ward:.- Two poorly stocked agrovets for the farmers. - Three hotels that only serve tea, mandazi, chapati and beans because everyone eats at home.(Nagen
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Unrelated: Jan 2020, while in Hurlingham, I noticed a pretty girl seated a few seats from me. Approached her, had a delightful 15-minute chat, & upon parting nikarequest for her number. She proposed connecting on IG instead. Typed her handle & it was Karun. Sijawahi shtuka hivo😂.
Kumbe Miss Karun ni niece wa Uhunye.
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Lakini as a man, kama unatafuta partner akufuliage nguo, akupikiage, akuoshee vyombo na akufanyiage chores, then sorry you're looking for a house help and not partner. These are personal responsibilities that you want to pass to someone else. You can do better.
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My dear sister, if he is into tech, then marry him. Tech bros never have women. Kazi ni computers tu. And they're very loyal and caring. Signed.
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Making progress step by step. I completed my 6 months of internship last week here & got a role. Learned a lot during this time from amazing team of young professionals & worked on various projects. Finally getting into the world of tech. Let's explore the realm of data further🚀
Recently received "We're pleased to inform you. " . It's been a week now in this company as a business intelligence intern. The experience has been good. Time to explore that data and learn a lot.
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Mliambiwa mtu wa Bliss awasaidie na logo au?
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My favourite has to be this F1 with @verly_maggie . We unknowingly recreated F2. F2 was 28th May 2018 tukitoka class ya Calculus. F1 is 5.5 years later, 24th November 2023. Uzeee
I want to see y'all November's favourite pictures.
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What if it affects her? But let me see.
Whatever you're eating, squeeze some fresh lime. Thank me immediately.
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I didn't know KOT has numbers hivi. #RejectFinanceBill2024 tweets are even getting 10k+ retweets. This is a movement.
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I agree😅 The first day I joined my current place, I only had my academic qualifications with a dream to transition to data. My HOD told me; "Buda nimeona the will to learn, and as someone gave me an opportunity to learn on the job, pia wewe nakupa opportunity ulearn kwa job". 🙏.
Unpopular opinion: Learning on the job subjects you to so much pressure and it's easy to crack. More so in a fast moving environment with defined KPIs.
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Graduate Trainee Programmes that are available in Kenya. Some of them are closing soon. All the best recent graduates. Check the thread. 1. Mastercard Foundation Association Program - 12-month duration
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Used to tell people that in UON tukisoma hesabu tulikua tunasoma kwa hall and they couldn't understand how. Unapata class ina 300 people. 😅 These CAT marks zimenimaliza😂😂 The unit is Stochastic Models for Social Processes😂
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We recently added a Ugandan-based member to our data team. He has been reaching out to me whenever he is stuck over the past 2 wks. Jana he asked me how I am always available to help him without excuses. My answer was that those who onboarded me set a precedent. Thankful for that.
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Until uone hio 😭😂
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One of my cousins husband lost his job at the same time she got a job. Her mum alimwita nyumbani akamwambia. "X, nisiskie Y anataseka. All that time amekua kazi sijawahi skia any of you ameteseka.".
I lost my job in June,wife akaniwacha July and akaolewa tena August,she got married in the same neighbourhood I live,yani hua tunapatana kwa njia. Suicide is on my head recently. But we move regardless.
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Another one more year . Celebrating 24 years of this crazy adventure we call life. I hope 24 will be good 🌟🎂🎉.Tunazeeka huu upande. Wueeh
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Recently received "We're pleased to inform you. " . It's been a week now in this company as a business intelligence intern. The experience has been good. Time to explore that data and learn a lot.
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Unajitetea ukiwa pande gani bwana chairman? @theking_aslan 😭😭
@Kimuzi_ Huyo Aslan alikuwa head boy wetu mtiaji Mbwa yeye.
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Nilikua nimelala kwa mat then this girl seated next to me nashangaa mbona ananisukuma akitaka nimpishe apite😂 Then she hand me this akiendaga. Kumbe mtu wangu uenjoy hivi 😌😂
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Buana ni Sunday. Cuddle your partner.
Software Engineers,How do you guys name your pull requests?. Do you have a system you use? I'm trying to improve my PR and Commit messages.
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Unaambia mtu your career field is tech anamake assumption uko na pesa kama kina Juma Allan au Bigzoo. Smh. Maliza kunambia niko na pesa unisaidie kulipa Fuliza. Shenzii 💀😹😹.
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Walifunga barabara pale Kasarani. Tumeshukia huko CarWash near Githurai. Currently past Allsopes headed to CBD. Mbogi imeshika from Muthaiga to Kahawa Sukari. Let's go. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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Look at this receipt. The trip that was 15.7KM took 33 minutes, and the charge was 410. Then kuna discount. 1. Toa 18.5% ya uber = 75.85.2. Toa 1litre fuel = 180.3. Toa taxes = 20. This driver made 135bob. 😅😅Hatujatoa wear and tear, car wash, etc. Slavery yenye mnasupport
Btw the same drivers on Bolt & Uber are the same ones on Little Cab. But purely different behaviour on the apps. Reason? Kamal noted that the biggest problem affecting the business is fair compensation for drivers. He hacked it.
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Jumping into a meeting with the COO and Chief of Staff to handle a data request for them. My first time to do it solo. Nimeambiwa I'm now a proper data professional. Natetemeka.
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3% of someone earning 100k is 30k🤨. That's so unfair to do it for others.
Q: Why must I contribute the 3% house levy when I already have a house?. MP Marwa Kitayama: Do it for another Kenyan. Let other Kenyans benefit from the gift that God has given you. #AMLiveNTV @zeynabIsmail
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Mimi huona watu wakisema their dads used to kubeba gazeti tu nashangaa how. My parents walikua wanakuja wote. And if my mum wasn't available na dad anakuja pekeake, he still used to carry a lot of food 🤣 Nilikua nabaki na food ya siku mbili bana.
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A certain girl gave me the crazy nights I have ever had. Three times in a week. I remember it was Monday, Wednesday and Saturday. Then after akanighost coz she was dating and felt bad cheating. Never felt so used maan. Nilikua hapo kwa DM nikimwambia he can never know. Haha.
Being used for sex as a man sio as fun as y’all put it hahaha.
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Mnaamua kushow up for each other as friends in job search but some decide kuficha opportunities. Wewe uko hapo unatuma opportunities. You realise friend ako na interviews hamkuapply. Ukimwuliza anazipata wapi anakwambia ni fulani tu aliapply. Kumbe mtu anaficha opportunities.
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@tm_shamir Wana mat za express. You're always sure you won't meet rude makanga. Lopha wanasimama every stage na kuenda wakibebabeba kwa barabara. You end up taking too much time kwa barabara.
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Kairo just said "A teacher might be working hard by waking up students from dormitory waingie morning preps in time, but not teaching in class." Very nice. Enlightened chap.
failing to speak doesn’t mean he is not intelligent, the guy is a billionaire , flew jets for Kq and might be probably working hard for his constituents as opposed to making useless noise in parliament.
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I really landed a good workplace to start my career. Every week's 1:1, I must inform my manager what I'm currently learning. She is always giving me tips on growing professionally. Great teammates who give you a chance to shine in what you do. Amazing place.
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What a journey it has been. I did it. Bachelor of Economics and Statistics from The University of Nairobi. Thank you to everyone who was part of my journey. Also .✔️CPA Section III.✔️Moringa School Software dev. I did it. To the next one. #UoN68graduation
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Wewe ukitokea pale Mombasani
Seeing that Ruger look a like making money and I’m here wondering why I haven’t started impersonating Harmonize 😭😭😭. This one time I was in Goma Congo and they started following our car thinking I was Konde Boy
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Safaricom Home Fibre seems to have trippled their speed. This is the 10mbps subscription. I also realised their ip adresses are now static. Took a competitor for them to do this? Smh
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Kwa JavaScript everything has a framework. Unadhania umeelewa JS unaskia kuna TS. Unadhania umeeewa JS unaskia kuna ReactJs. Kidogo ukidhania umeelewa React unaskia kuna NextJs. Ukidhania umeelewa NodeJs unaskia NestJs. Niki mani.
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I wonder how Gilbeys fell off as the most preferred mzinga by young people. Siku hizi people would rather go for Gordons or even Best than tale Gilbeys. How did demand of the most preferred Gin na mavijana go down hivo?.
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To be honest Airtel only has a problem of marketing.
The Airtel money app actually allows you to do all that and more, I had really underestimated them
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I have 7 friends who, so far, have gotten jobs through links that I sent to them. My point is, if you come across an advertisement that you know a friend is qualified for, send it to them. That might be their way into employment.
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MC fullstop anakapitia maan. I hope he heals 🙏 This man is a legend
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Maina is openly on a radio telling people to play aviation to earn more money. Why is the media allowed to publicise betting activities?.
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Anyone on my timeline would be looking for a graduate employee. Wanjiku here has been looking for a job for some time. If you have an opportunity reach her.
I'm in the pits financially, mentally and emotionally. I'm only managing physically otherwise the rest ni walking dead tu.
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2yrs ago someone huku once said relatives wanaeza kumaliza na money requests na nikacomment "Your relatives ndo shida", I now apologise. I was just a kid in campus. Mzazi wako anaeza kosa kukuitisha pesa at all ujijenge but every week unapata several calls from relatives. Wueeh.
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Another year older, another reason to celebrate! 24 has been really good to me. I hope 25 will be good as well 🌟🎂🎉. Uzee unaingia. Wueeh
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Kuna kitu inanisumbua akili. I used my card for a free trial somewhere but sikumbuki ni wapi. And the amount to be charged si kidogo. Sieet.
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Ni kama mimi sikuagi bachelor😂Hadi nakuaga na meal plan ya supper which I follow. 😆
I've come to believe that bachelor life is a set of skills, and you can't convince me otherwise. I mean, what is microwave tea?.
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This is me. All I knew was software stuff, but I wanted to get into data. Nilikua tu na knowledge ya degree. Did several applications hoping I land a data one before software. It worked. Someone saw my CV akanambia we will give you a chance we train you. No interview at all.
I see a lot of people who started a certain job with little to no knowledge or experience in the same, but they learnt on the job and got a career out of it, I wish someone could take that same leap of faith with me as a data analyst. i dont even need a lot of training 🥹😂🙏.
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Ahyaa. Mwaka umeisha? That's has been so fast. I really learnt a lot in that year. The learning continues.
Recently received "We're pleased to inform you. " . It's been a week now in this company as a business intelligence intern. The experience has been good. Time to explore that data and learn a lot.
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I've never seen a techie who says s/he works at Pornhub. Who develop the platform?.
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Hapa nikishaongeza monitor baass. Mnatoa pesa wapi pia mimi nitoe ya monitor. Hahaha
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