John
@Johnnyp135DFS
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9,262
Following
1,208
Media
625
Statuses
6,943
DFS. Johnnyp135. tweets aren't legally binding. teacher. esq. @fantasypts .
Joined August 2011
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SEVENTEEN
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無料クーポン
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DG X ORM KORNNAPHAT
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連休明け
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carat
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अब्दुल कलाम
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पूर्व राष्ट्रपति
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アトラス彗星
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FELIP TAKES ON BBPHSTAGE
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JC BBPH MAINSTAGE
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オーストラリア
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ITZY WORLD IS STILL DIFFERENT
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ミンギュ
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金木犀の香り
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#RokKłamstw
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JimmySea with PizzaMaru
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うさぎだらけくじ
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ジョシュア
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タワレコ
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Finding out Kellen Moore actually was the donkey and McCarthy was the sharp was the biggest shock of this NFL season for me
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Before having a child of my own, I used to say “I have a dog, she’s practically a child.”
I now understand how stupid and insensitive that was - I apologize for every time I ever said that.
It isn’t remotely the same - different universe - dogs are easy
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Is it a coincidence that the Blink 182 guy found all the evidence of UFOs and then right after re-joining the band, the UFOs started showing up in broad daylight?
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My favorite new Twitter genre is people crying because they actually expect casual bestball drafters to let them finish their stacks
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What if, and hear me out…, we set an age cap on running for President so we can stop having 70 year olds?
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The year is 2028, Kyle Pitts still goes in the third round and still stinks every year. The fantasy community is now blaming his 4th HC and 11th OC.
It’s coming. They all say.
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As someone approaching his mid 30s, I know that this rejuvenation only lasts for 3-4 days at most before I have another sleep injury
Vikings WR Adam Thielen feels “rejuvenated” as he enters his 10th season in Minnesota
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Truth is tho - he’s a legend.
Quit the band for UFOs and people clowned him.
And then he leaked the footage that directly led to the government declassifying UFO information lol
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Booked a birthday win in the $5 150-max… but I finished 3 DK out of first place with Breece Hall on the squad - bittersweet.
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Damnit I posted that as a joke (I know who Tom is)
But he had to go and QT me and now I’m going to get dragged by Blink fans - but this is hilarious
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Schefter is such a valuable Twitter follow that “dunking” on him isn’t even worth it to risk being blocked and losing that access
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@DanStrafford
She sounds like a really thoughtful kid - I’m sure her mom would be proud of that
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The Wordle guy cashed out for $1M+ on a simple game he made for fun and people are legit mad at him lol
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My man always gets to the playoffs, but never finishes
Aaron Rodgers and Shailene Woodley have reportedly called off their engagement.
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They literally explained going for 2 on tv and people are still going mad on Twitter
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Won a
@DraftKings
ticket to the ($4,444) MEGA Millionaire, but since they posted it at a new price point ($4,494) for Thursday I can't even use it lmao.
@DK_Assist
guy told me I would just have to wait until it's run at the right price... at least they have lizard PFPs
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Took a big step back from cash games and single entries this year to focus on 150-max and small field 3 max and i ended up with my biggest ROI since DFS was easy.
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No matter how many times I see this, I still can’t believe it’s real
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It’s always so weird to me when Fantasy touts ramble about how hard or busy their jobs are… like 99% of your listeners would trade you jobs - they don’t want to hear that stuff
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USFL on
@DraftKings
:
- accidentally gave out 20k free tickets to main contest
- leaked full ownership
- DST scoring is wrong
- Can’t late swap 5PM players after 4PM
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The circle is far superior to the 4 way stop but we aren’t a smart enough country to use them more
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In a surprising turn of events, Draftkings USFL may fold before the actual USFL
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Panthers dropping Baker in hopes SF picks him up and he ruins their team
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I’d never want my friends to see if I was able to bet $31k on DK - cuz it would mean I’m down really bad to get those limits
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Being rich. The answer is being rich.
Breaking: New study finds drinking expensive alcohol linked to longer lives and drinking cheap alcohol linked to shorter lives. Scientists desperately trying to identify the features of alcohol molecules that could explain this puzzle.
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My guy was grinding a second job and still dusting Miles Sanders every slate
Eagles’ RB
@bostonscott2
is now the first two-sport NFL and Rocket League pro, joining
@DignitasRL
. Scott joins
@DignitasRL
as a sub and content creator. Scott achieved ‘Grand Champion’ status in Rocket League by being the Top .52% in a game with over six million ranked players.
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I’m like 3 days into trying this cold shower fad and I’m just going to say… this better work, because it’s absolute torture for the first minute that you stand there
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My TL is now a promoted tweet like every 4-5 tweets… anyone else?
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Seems like the management team at NFFC does not understand that this was a CRIME (and possibility long standing crimes) involving all of their customer money…
I have never played at NFFC but it’s clear this scandal’s impact won’t just affect their site
The GM Greg’s mistakes thus far have been in trusting his rogue employee
- trusting not to take advantage of the lack of software restrictions
- trusting that this was just a live
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Remember, you can leave your bad war jokes in drafts. That way you can delete them later instead of posting
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I think the moral of the Annie Agar story today - is to never go after Jaguars Twitter
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Zero RB nerds are just lucky that every RB in the league got hurt!
He screams for 6th time in 7 years
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Amazing that MokLovin came out of twitter retirement just to bury someone
Really hate to do this, but feel like your followers deserve transparency. Also worth mentioning that I never sent you USFL invites, but stumbled upon your games and fired up USFL for the first time since you were such a great player in NBA. Congrats on getting unstuck!
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Me and the boys after we played $1M in volume and got a toaster.
First glance, the Onyx tier rewards on DraftKings this year are massive step down from the offered rewards in 2022. Hopefully the fine print on the bottom comes through because this glimpse kind of sucks ESPECIALLY when you factor in how they made it harder to get Onyx vs 2022.
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Shout out to
@CalSpears
and
@ScoresOdds
- setting up my family room and the app is so clutch for smart TVs
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I’d bet a substantial amount that the % is actually much higher - people often think they aren’t paycheck to paycheck because they have a 401K
BREAKING: 64% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck, a near all-time high, per CNBC.
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This is embarrassing.
White collar crimes being celebrated by our politicians because he donated to them.
I feel like I’m going insane
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One perk that has come with regulated betting is that this guy is guaranteed to get this $.
Imagine if someone made this bet on 5Dimes - they would’ve just closed their account and said it was credit card fraud or something
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If your bestball team has an actual starting QB and 3 RBs projected over 10 ppr points, I think it probably advances lol
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FanDuel cancelled their guaranteed prize pool contests, which state regulations require to be run - I have never seen something like this before
We apologize for any confusion. Due to a technical error, we have voided today's UFC contests that locked at 4PM ET and NFL contests that locked at 4:30PM ET. All entry fees have been refunded to your account.
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The “Rams were stupid for mortgaging their future” crowd are the maddest people on the planet right now
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All it took for Pete to call an aggressive passing offense was a multi year relationship breakdown with Russ, followed by a breakup, followed by a Week 1 revenge game.
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Idc if Twitter is X now or whatever - but the buttons disappearing every time I scroll down is the worst thing to ever happen to me
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My favorite argument for 2A is that we need weapons to stand up against the government… as if the US doesn’t have this military budget
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The best part about Staley going for 4th downs is that it makes people legitimately mad
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So... those forgivable loans meant for small businesses that actually went to large corporations and rich people with side hustles - that was actually bad?
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Edmonds would’ve been a million % owned if we got the news early, so naturally he’s busting when the field misread the tea leaves
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The year is 2024, the war with Russia has taken all stocks to $0 - except for $DKNG - which is still fighting for support at $18. This makes
@araven52
the richest man on Earth
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Wentz played good enough to cost IND a R1 pick and bad enough to cost them the playoffs. Lmao.
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Lmao this is the dumbest looking vehicle I’ve ever seen and my previous neighbor had a hummer
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If you don’t tip your delivery drivers, you are a legitimately bad person
weak as hell
send me your venmo
i’ll send you the tips they should’ve sent you
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Was this cooked with a blowtorch?
Trying this again. I needed to give Steak Twitter something to chew on. Wagyu strip. 18 ounce. 🔥🔥🐮☠️
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It should be illegal to force people to "chat with an agent" to cancel a subscription
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I don’t care if Satan himself starts a podcast on Spotify, I’m not switching to Apple or Amazon music - y’all are crazy
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What does PayPal even do anymore? The only time I ever use it is when I’m too lazy to fill in shipping info
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This rules
A DFW woman was pulled over and ticketed for driving alone in the HOV lane. She's 34 weeks pregnant and tells the cop her unborn child counts as a passenger since Roe V. Wade was overturned. The state can't have it both ways, she argues.
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It was reported Vaughn would be lead back and that Darrel was “good to go” and someone will be winning a milly with Gio and Jerick lolol
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This is amazing. But also shows how fucking sad cubicle life is
Recently one of our newest team members asked if he could decorate his cubical. When I said yes, I wasn't expecting this...
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Instead of talking about that holding call, everyone should be talking about Mahomes scrambling on an aggravated high ankle sprain to seal the game
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Lol what’s elite about these people? Zero chance they can produce a kid who runs a sub 5.0 40
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The actual news that matters today is Sony Michel - he's totally gonna be a Ram and that's gonna be freaking annoying
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So Biden is offering Ts and Ps. And Trump didn’t know who invaded who. We are electing our best
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ANYTHING but directv and I’ll pay them whatever they want
Apple reportedly has emerged as the likely destination of the NFL's Sunday Ticket package.
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NFL script writers gonna give us Lamar v Flacco AFC championship game?
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Biggest takeaway from yesterday is that people are grossly underestimating PED use in sports lol
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I wish I could steal $10B from my clients, buy up billions in property and then when I get caught just say “oops lol” and have everyone cheer for me.
This is definitely a simulation
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So did anyone watching him play
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Please let SF kick the FG and then Dallas drive down the field and score with time expiring forcing McCarthy to chose between an XP to tie and 2PC to win
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Both sides of the Elon debate seem to forget the key element in this whole thing
He ACCIDENTALLY agreed to a binding contract to buy Twitter
He’s not a super genius with some deep plan
And there is no conspiracy with another country
He’s just scrambling for profitability
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NFL furious that MIA tried to sign Brady away, but DGAF that Ross offered Flores $ to lose games. The same NFL that suspended Ridley for a year over game integrity…Lmao
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And he still hasn’t cuz he basically didn’t even bet this - imagine posting this for a $0.30 bet
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I can’t believe these guys
1. Posted on a forum (as old as their cheating software)
2. Said “he didn’t even win!” As if that matters at all
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I had a client that ended up with PTSD from a surprise active shooter drill. The “shooter” was an officer in a hoodie that came unannounced through a back door. They rushed into her classroom and “shot” her in the head. In that moment, she didn’t know it was a blank.
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Ever wonder why books love to post these?
It’s because they make way more than $950k on stupid parlays like this
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The biggest takeaway here is that Raheem Mostert would have crushed in that W1 game he got hurt in 2020 and I was right for playing him
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When
@RyanHodge
and I first turned
@PowerHourDFS
into a full website/brand - we always paid a % of revenue generated work.
I wish that was more common in this industry - it’s hard to know if you’re being exploited without knowing what type of revenue your work is generating
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