Wakajeje 👑
@Ifeoludavies
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Be the reason someone gives love a chance again | Sales boy for @PradXpress |
Akure, Nigeria
Joined January 2014
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Are you in Akure, Ado or it’s environs and in need of cars or SUVs for rental for your events or travels to any part of the country at affordable price?
Send DM or call 08109794683 to make bookings/enquiries
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@Pauloofficials
@iDanDizzy
Somewhere out there,there’s a tree whose single purpose is to replace the oxygen you waste
find it and apologize
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Nigerians are so undefeated, you cant deal with their fury 😂 😂 😂
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I'm on bike now and something is telling me to totori the Bikeman in the armpit
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African Mother: Segun bring me water
Segun: To drink?
African Mother: No, to turn to wine
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Kidnappers: We have kidnapped your son.
Mom: Can i talk to him please?
*hands over the phone to me*
Me: Mummy
Mom : Why Did you not wash the dishes before going out?!!!!!!
Me:
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Dear Lord, Whoever we will meet in life that will cost us untimely death, may our paths never cross in Jesus name
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@Segun_Odunayo
I really don't know but I think the whole 'I needed you to intensify effort to get me' line is not really needed, do you know the kinda effort I put in place walking up to you in the first place... I can't be chasing kingdom of heaven and you at the same time dear
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This guy is one of the natural disasters we have in this country 😂😂😂
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Police: Shoots a criminal
Doctor: Saves criminal's life
Judge: Sentence criminal to death
Doctor:
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Congratulations to all those who found job, love and happiness this year, the rest of us Aluta Continua
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Dear God, whenever I'm about to bite more than I chew, make me lose appetite
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@debora_20230
In as much as you/we don't know the severity of what he was doing on his phone, all of these online judgements are baseless and not needed
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This guy killed his role as Bashorun in the Anikulapo series
Learnt he's Herbert Ogunde’s last son
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Small quarrel, you want to break up🙄 For which relationship? The one that I suffered to toast you?!!!🤷♂
Kolewerk!!!!!
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FYI: The said Assembly Complex was just renovated in 2022 by the Late Governor Akeredolu but our Governor is budgeting 500 million to renovate it again just 2 years after the initial renovation 😂😂😂
We know what you are sir 🫵🏾
EXCLUSIVE: Ondo Government Budgets N245million To Buy Two SUVs For Assembly Speaker, Deputy, N107million For Primary Healthcare | Sahara Reporters
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I am learning to love the sound of my feet walking away from things not meant for me
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Dear Future wife,
Please don't go after or date a married man, karma is a bitch, you will not want me to pay for your sins, please pity me
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@heisrema
If you see any light skinned Rhoda wey get yansh abeg help me leave am, na my babe
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Friends: Can we meet this weekend?
Me: You should have told me earlier, I've got a really busy schedule
Me throughout that weekend:
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Before you go out for that Morning Walk today, Remember "A rabbit runs but lives only 15years, meanwhile a tortoise doesn't run, does nothing and lives 250 years"
We that we're using our Saturday morning to sleep, we know what we are doing
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@Naija_PR
Personally I don't see anything wrong with it, a little child got to feed, and if you know you sexualize nursing mothers feeding their babies in public, see a doctor cos o normal rara
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@TechCabal
I hope you all that thought less of him and what he has to bring to governance in Osun are cowering in shame now
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Yoruba Mother: Did I not tell you to go do the dishes?
*slaps you*
Me: Mummy, but I've done the dishes now
Yoruba Mother: Really? Ah, Mabinu oko mi, I'm sorry
Me:
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I'm tired of blocking family members and relations on social media.
Uncle Ayo, Yes I love pussy
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There are levels to being clueless but you see this right here just stole the crown
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Dear future wife, please don't date a married man, karma is a real bitch, you will not want me to pay for your sins, please pity me
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It's kind of fucked up how all of a sudden, someone just wakes up and decides to never talk to you again, no reason, no explanation, no words said. They just leave you hanging like you never meant shit to them and what hurt the most is how they made it look so easy
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How boarding house students walk when they see their parents coming with the big cooler on visiting day
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African Mothers: Tayo!! I'm talking to you and you dare keep quiet??
Tayo: But Mummy, you said........
African Mothers: Keep quiet my friend, when I'm talking to you, you keep quiet
Tayo:
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@chowwder_
“Remember when you used to talk crazy and insult me, I told you one thing, it will stop one day”
Wizkid probably carried the pain from her insults for a long time and acted based off it but in all weyrey ni Bobo yen
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but stop treating people like they will never rise again
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After taking my project proposal to my supervisor for about the 57th time and he brings out a Biro to make corrections again...
Me:
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On my wedding day, if my wife isn't crying as soon as she sees me, I'm going back home. I can't marry an ungrateful person. God gave me to you and you can't cry tears of joy?
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"Never bite d hand that fed you" just because you sent me 100 airtime?
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I don't know who needs to hear this but being rude and arrogant will take you nowhere, sometimes good manners can open doors which education or qualifications cannot open
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When someone helps you and the person is struggling too.
That's not help, that's LOVE. Don't take it for granted
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Killing Abel did not make Cain become the accepted one.
Dragging others down will never raise you up
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If you like, post tears 😭😭 emoji from now till tomorrow, we no go ask you wetin happen
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When my mum complains about how much time I spend on my phone and how I'm doing nothing meaningful with my life
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Everytime i put money away for rainy days, it rains the next day.
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That I said I can work under pressure doesn't mean I want to die for your company, I'm not your company's messiah
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*Trying to sign up on a new site*
Website: enter new password
Seun: mydick
Website: this password is too short
Seun:
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Imagine telling your girlfriend you have slight headache and she give you brezz to suck
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A lot of us just wanna have friends who legit care about us and wants the best for us....
Is that too much to ask for?
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Me: If I leave Akure by 9am, by 1pm I should get to Lagos, the journey should not be more than 4 hours
Lagos Traffic:
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Can we please replicate the peace that came with Edo's election in Ondo State fgs???
#AkureShootings
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That moment you get back from an errand only to be told your wealthy uncle who promised to see you before he leaves already left
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@Eerinmide
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With these few points of mine, I hope I've been able to convince you and not to confuse you that you're talking in the nonsense, you're talking in the rubbish and the thing that do not have a good experience
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They're hating on you, they're hating on you, yen yen yen, what do you have that they're hating on?
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Bill Gates started Microsoft with his best friend Paul..
Larry Page started Google with his best friend Sergey..
Jack Ma started Alibaba with 8 of his friends..
What are you doing with your friendsn??
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@main_JESSE_
@Morris_Monye
Let's excuse this Hakimi’s story for a sec and talk about your take
Someone decides to marry and spend the rest of their life with you, build a family with you, be your support system and even birthing your offsprings while caring for your home and they're not family?? 😂😂😂
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When guests come over and your mum takes out snacks you have never seen before
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@_justhenry
@Segun_Odunayo
There was probably somebody she wanted him to outdo, and the thing is, if I get you to accept me that way, I should be rest assured that when someone else who can intensify more effort comes around, I'd lose you again
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@iSlimfit
Personally I don't think they deserve it
Towards the end of the video, the other guy was seen opening door for someone coming in, so it wasn't like they weren't going about their duty if you ask me
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Lawyer: Why were you arrested?
Tola: For shopping early
Lawyer: Well that's not a crime. Anyway how early was it?
Tola: Before the shop opened
Lawyer:
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Native Doctor: Your case is settled, you'll bear a child
Yoruba Woman: Praise the Lord!!!!! Thank You Jesus!!!!!
Native Doctor:
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Some of us have become enemies to some girls just because we refused to send them money
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Most people don't really care about what you're going through, they just hope you're okay enough to still come through for them when they need you
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The journey of a thousand mile begins with a transport fare. No allow motivational speaker dey deceive you
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Dad: Ask your mom if she needs help
Me: Mom do you need any help?
Mom: Yes
Dad: *looks at me* go help your mom
Me:
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Trying to force a relationship with someone who does not want you just because 'you like them so much' is like trying to get admitted to a school that does not offer the courses you want because you like the school so much
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*Hugs my crush
She: Why did you keep one hand in your pocket
Me:
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When they want to borrow money vs When it's time to pay back
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@cassiethequeen
As seed germinate into a plant, so shall this violence germinate into wahala. There won't be solution, everywhere must scatter
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Me and my homies entering 2020 without achieving a single thing in 2019
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*After sex*
Him: You were so sweet dear
Her:*blush* So what are we now?
Him: We're the World, We are the Children 🎶
Her:
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Me: You should learn to take a joke for real
My Bae: I took you didn't i
Me:
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@urPapaDeyCraze
Dem ask weyrey same question, she wan shift post 😂
Set awon "na woman I be o"
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On the last day, some guys would be looking at the big yansh of some girls going to hell. Angel will be shouting 'Ola enter!! Ola enter!!! but they will not hear
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Are you mad
Grown Ass Adult: I'm not mad, I'm your master.
Me:
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Rinu: "Putin is a War Criminal"
Nigerians: Shey make we shepe for Rinu or make we go beg Putin 😩😩
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May the loves of our lives not die in the course of giving birth to our offsprings
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When a tall babe is riding you but you can't reach her titties
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Some people think because they don't support you that it will hold you back. Let me just tell you, God will put total strangers in your path to get you where you're supposed to be, so
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We all out here chasing money, some are in prisons chasing freedom.....
Be grateful
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Some people don't wanna see you eat unless they feed you 😔, but God will not cease to disappoint them.
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The first time you eat your new girlfriend's food that's been over pampered with salt
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A lot of you ladies need to hear this. Stop wasting our time, if you know you're not going to date us, don't deprive your friends of such golden opportunity, give them our numbers. Am I communicating?
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Never mock a pain you haven't endured because when life hits you, you might become everything you ever criticized
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Hello baby, can I be eating your work in the eyes of the carton?
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How last borns chill by the door waiting for your parents to come back home so they can report you
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To whom it may concern, i hope one day you find someone who makes flowers grow even in the darkest parts of you
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