HellBentVet ~ Warrior Bard
@HellBentVet
Followers
61,452
Following
43,190
Media
331
Statuses
14,871
Disabled Army Veteran, 1980-1993, Widower, Poet. Democrat by Integrity
Left Coast Oregon
Joined July 2016
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Send us removal request.
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Pinned Tweet
Sometimes
I feel
Like a poster
On the wall
Of life
Nothing to see
At all
If wind
Could take me
I'd let it
Not much happens
When alone
Stuck on the wall
Tried to call out
Once
A man
Pushing a baby carriage
Filled with books
Still
Words never came
I closed
My paper eyes
and cried
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Dollar Tree
The guy ahead of me had 2 items and his card didn't work... They tried twice and it declined twice.
He left and the cashier put his 2 items aside and rang mine up. I told him to add the 2 items to my purchase quickly...
I went outside, met they guy in his disability
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My birthday is here, 63 today, feeling lonesome. Not sure if it's the day, the gray in the sky or me being me.
I woke up and went back to sleep 3 times to reset my moods. I'm okay, just tender in my me today.
Respect, Hb
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I have to say I woke up early this morning, went outside and changed my oil and put a new battery in I bought yesterday. Felt good so I went for a drive, more about that later. However, I'm having a good day and probably the best I have had since before my wife passed
Respect, Hb
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I'm a sunflower
I grew in the pocket
Of a soldier
Who died
Knowing not why
Or who
He was fighting
He spoke Russian
I heard him
He wasn't a bad person
Had family
Was a son
To a loving mother
She cries now
Alone
I hear her
He and I
One
Life gone
For the boy
With seeds
In his pocket
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When I was stationed in Germany during the Cold war our entire mission was to keep the Soviet Union in check, we trained for this vigorously. We had contingency plans at every route that Russia could use to assault Western Germany. They were the enemy, Republicans love them now.
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Tonight
I sure could use about 10,000 hugs.
Me
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I wish the little boy me who was tied up with extension cords by my dad in a dark closet would have known someday he would have over 55,000 friends.
Thank you for seeing my pain with me.
Respect, Hb
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Most of you
Reading this
Will just scroll past
Thinking oh
It's just that poet guy
Post nothing political
Complaining
Grieving
Again
Don't have time
To feel him
To those who do read, I humbly thank you
Life is hard enough for all us. I appreciate you spending time with me
Hb
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I went to a garage sale this morning and met a widower whose wife passed 2 months ago. He had a box of her art work, 45 paintings, he said he can't stand seeing them and needed them gone.
I bought them all and told him if he needs them in the future to contact me.
I get it
Hb
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So this is a picture of my best friend, Willow, and she was my wife's cat. It took her 4 months after my wife passed away for her to come to me. I think it would have been sooner but Bebe my dog was always in spots in Willow could have had. Since Willow is the only pet that I
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Who else is having difficulty right now?
I'm an empath and feel so incredibly much hurt and struggle.
Mine is enhanced by severe loneliness.
I'm okay, only needed to voice it.
Hb
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Bb just died...
I think it was a heart attack or stroke
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I went to Dollar Tree apparently to get Willow her new paper bag.
I'm just checking in with you because I know you care.
Respect, Hb
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I'm actually doing okay
I am passed grieving
Do I miss her? Yes, of course
I am no longer hoping for a relationship
I am finding myself
I am moving soon (finally)
I will have 7 fruit trees, a garden and my own walls (well rented)
I am now retired
I kinda miss you all
Respect, Hb
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Hb UPDATE:
I'm doing pretty good grieving Ginger and feel like something clicked to good a few days ago. I have to admit I've not been keeping up on meds or vitamins and been sulking for months.
I'm now thinking more clearly and ahead, it's been awhile for sure.
I thank you
Hb
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Anyone else out there wondering if they'll be alone for the rest of their life?
I sure am.
How do you handle such thoughts, and yes I know they creep in at night.
Respect, Hb
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By the way
In case you haven't noticed, the old strong Hb is back.
Deal with it
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I'm closing in on 50,000 followers, a huge milestone. I thank you for believing in me and caring as family do. I can say this now, you have saved my life... I appreciate you so much.
Love and a sincere thank you, Respect, Hb
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Hb secret
Sometimes I write just so people talk to me.
It lonely here
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AK-15, AR-15, AK-47, How about we just be done with the bullshit and call it the GOP-15
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Happy Thanksgiving from my heart to yours. I'm missing my late wife Ginger immensely today. Here's a picture of her in Oregon when she was little. I'm making a full blown meal, turkey, mashed potatoes, brussel sprouts with hollandaise, stuffing, gravy and store apple pie, yumm
Hb
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I'm in the mood to follow more strong Democrats. We have to stay united or 2024 will be our last presidential election. There will not be another chance at keeping the United States worth belonging too.
Follow me, if you're blue and awake I'll get you.
If you are following me
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I haven't been posting because I have nothing positive to share with you, and I don't like that. It's hard to admit it, I find myself pulling back into cement walls of myself
I just needed you to know that, you matter to me and you deserve uplifting posts, and I just don't have
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I went to a garage sale yesterday, asked the gal what she wanted for the king's challis, she said it wasn't one and that it was a vase...
Today there is no doubt as to it's long hidden destined identity.
Meet Gunnar my nord challis
Respect, Hb
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Want to feel the blue wave!
I found this at Goodwill...
March, signed by John Lewis! I paid 2.99 for it!
SCORE and mine forever
Respect, Hb
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Told my neighbor that I would get her a Whopper, she's elderly, doesn't drive anymore and loves them. At Burger King I ask the cheapest way to get 2 Whoppers they said it would be $15, let's just get one for her then. At the window they gave me 2 Whoppers for free...
Karma love
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I've lived on the coast of Oregon since 2007 and am only now allowing my mind and body to see and feel it.
I may be alone
But Oregon
She's my home
Hb
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Took this photo of my rhododendrons as they were being lightly kissed by rain and the hint of a sleepy sunset in the horizon.
Goodnight,
Respect, Hb
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So you know when I need something I put it out there to the universe with karma. I've been looking for a bird bath and wanting to pay a decent price. Pick this up today at a thrift store for $20. I really like it, I know you do too.
Respect, Hb
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Sitting here
I never planed too
Not today
Still
We both knew
You came to me
Wanted up
I obeyed
The second I had you
It hit
Heart attack
I held tight
Not wanting to let go
Kissed you
Like I did Ginger
Just last year
Told you both
My forever loves
I did my best
Goodbye Bb Girl
💙u
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A quick check in with you
I'm doing okay and feel like my world may start spinning again.
I am grateful for your respect and kindness. I hope someday I can show you how much I appreciate you.
Always,
Hb
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Hang on for this
As you know My wife Ginger died on Aug 6th, 2021. Although I tried I could never contact her father and I concluded that he had passed just weeks before she did.
Well today when I did the search I've been doing on and off since Ginger passed to locate him. I
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Not the news we were hoping for, my younger sister has pancreatic cancer. Her birthday is next week and she will be 61. The news is devastating for the family, because our mother died of kidney cancer at 66 and prior to that she had many different cancers. My dad died of
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Today
My tears are falling
On the inside
I'm sad
As I've ever been
I'm okay
But, just barely
Hb
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I feel like the only reason I'm alive is to take care of the cat of my late wife.
6am and I'm going back to bed and plan to stay there all damn day.
Mood -
Disappointed in myself
I'm not seeking attention in any way. Simply informing you my only friends.
Night,
Hb
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@SDonnelly_77
I appreciate your kind words so much, the road hasn't been easy with me, and I appreciate you staying long for the ride
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Last Sunday while driving past my old apartment as I often do as it's only a block away. I always think I should stop and say hello to one named Ginger, she is so frail. If she is up her blinds are slightly raised. I saw they were as I passed by. I hit the intersection and
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Pics just now, this is Gardiner, Oregon, I live here
Respect, Hb
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Yesterday, I donated my late wife's wedding dress to a local business. It was time, I was okay with it and they gave me a hug. So it actually worked out very nicely.
Memories are forever, I didn't need to see things that made me feel bad that she wasn't here, because she is.
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Sights today!
Do you have a favorite?
Should I continue taking pics to share?
Respect, Hb
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Getting ready to move is hard work, packing cleaning, spot painting. Uggg it sure will be nice when I am in the other place though.
Life will be much better and I'll be grounding in my garden. Seems like a dream after the past years.
Thanks friends
Respect, Hb
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I made a Bb girl taco, back to the vet tomorrow, she still needs well wishes.
Doesn't she make a cute taco!
Hb
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Bb is at the crematorium in coos Bay, I will pick her ashes up next Wednesday and place some with my wife on the hill.
Is this difficult
Absolutely
Will I be okay
I sure hope so
I appreciate your kind words for my sweet Bb Girl puppy, she was part of me and you in many ways
Hb
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Yes I'm a damn good cook who doesn't need recipes most of the time. Welcome to my feast, again, Happy Thanksgiving!
Respect, Hb
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My life is good
I'm not homeless
I live in the house
Have a yard
Fruit trees
Garden vegetables and flowers
All my bills are covered every month
I no longer owe back child support
Happy about that
I'm just lonely
Just need some friends to come and hang out here.
I got
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It's been many years since I've been proud of myself. I can honestly say, today I am.
I'm finally feeling worth, I can only hope it lasts.
I may not love myself (yet), however I can feel a light in my me.
Lastly, I appreciate you for caring, when I couldn't myself.
Respect, Hb
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Willow's book catwalk I made after my wife died.
She loves it and this is now the room I sleep in.
Thoughts?
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A simple tile Mosaic someone made with great care that I picked up from an estate sale today, price $5.00.
It's kind of sad how things we put our heart into disappear into someone else's life without much thought after we pass on.
I really like it it looks good on my wall.
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Today
I'm 23,224 days old
Made it this far with good people like you.
I read your comments, took many to heart. Making some adjustments needed to stabilize myself.
I don't deserve friends like you, but I appreciate you being along side me here.
Respect, Hb
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Let's do this (to get my mind off of other things)
If you can respond to this post I vetted and am following you.
If you want more RESISTERS to follow you (And we ARE ResistERS, not ResistORS, which is a small electrical part.)
Respond with a brief hello to others reading this
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Unedited pictures from today
Enjoy
Respect, Hb
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@kimmy_272727
If I was The cashier I would have definitely did the same and paid for it myself. You're good people too
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I am finding social media depresses me badly
I'm sorry
I am
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How beautiful
The flower
Felt
Until
She
Was called
Only
A weed
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@HeatherScottID
Seek immediate mental health you idiot, this is not okay in any form and you fucking know it.
Have the day you deserve... Twatwaffle
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I'm done grieving the loss of my wife, I'm well past it. Now I'm looking back at my life and feel like a ghost in my own past.
If I'm grieving anything it's the America I thought was serving. It's very difficult for me to feel proud of my service, sadly.
I know,
Respect, Hb
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This is Willow looking out the window beside my bed tonight. And yes my bed is by the window and I can watch stars and shooting stars in it. You can be jealous if you like, I completely understand. We'll talk to you tomorrow have a great night.
Respect, Hb
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Received bad news regarding one of my four sisters today.
I'm not comfortable going into detail until we know more. However, love those who love you.
Hb
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Some of my day, it was rather magical, enjoy.
Ps
Sometimes magic is waiting for you, seek the gift.
Respect, Hb
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Sometimes
Well, most
I don't know where the words or feelings rise from. I just hear them rise from inside from a place I'm sure I'd rather not know.
Hi
I'm glad you accept me as I am, thank you.
Respect, Hb
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I'm realizing that my biggest problem in my life, in my grieving, in moving on and through is me.
I do believe that I'm going to be okay, I want to be okay, I am okay... Mostly
Everyday I do nothing is one day less of something positive I could've accomplished
Hi
Respect,
Hb
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I took all of these this morning, none have been edited in anyway. Using darkness to find beach beauty. Taken at Stonefield Beach near the hotel we managed years ago. I also have some interesting videos.
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Oh, by the way, yes, I lost my wife over 2 years ago and I am a widower, however I'm also single.
Alive
Finding light again
I live in Wonder
We all do
Hi, I'm Ty
You know me as Hb
Respect, Hb
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My good deed for the day. Followed a car 15 miles to town where I could pull alongside and tell the driver they had 2 brake lights out. He thanked me and pulled into a parts store. Good stuff
Respect, Hb
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I'm finding not being on Twitter is helping me heal by allowing me to grieve in the most basic way. Finding strength, acceptance and moving through on my own pain.
I leaned into you, forgetting there was still a "me" that only "I" could find, hold and crawl though dark.
Love
Hb
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I'm okay, updates soon. I miss you all, I do.
I'm pretty okay.
Love,
Respect, Hb
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She is definitely enjoying The first signs of fall!
Meowee
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By the way
I am making apple pies today, well, Apple and blackberry pies mix. The apples are frozen from my trees in my backyard and the blackberries are ones that I picked during the summer. I buy pre-made Frozen crust as I've never made pie crust or anything to do with dough in
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No words needed
Bb with her favorite toy
Hugs
Hb
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I'm pretty certain my account will be banned...
I just called a follower a WANKER!
ALSO
WHERE THE HECK DID I PULL THAT FROM!
Hb
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10 months
Today
I lost you
10 months
I've loved you
Alone
10 months
I've cried some
No more though
Everyday
I'm learning
Missing you
Is normal
Part of my day
I'm not broken
I'm grieving
When you died
My love for you
Stayed
I packed it deep
In my heart
Where you were
To feel
Okay
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My tears
Fall
Silently
Down my face
Into
My emptying heart
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I miss having someone to hug
You think there'd be someone out there right
Nope
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He keeps
Three bottles of liquor
High up on a shelf
He got them all for her
When they need help
One for lovin'
One for the dance
The last bottle
Sadly
Saved
For himself
To swim away
From missing her
Where she went
There's no comin' back
Three unopened bottles
Of never
On a shelf
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This one
I'm writing for me
I saw you
In my dream
Felt you
In my heart
Touched you
In my soul
Like love does
When it just is
No thoughts
Of another
No rainbow
To paint in snow
You held me
For a moment
Your eyes loving
True
You whispered
Without speaking
You're okay
Its time
Go
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I've learned
While we can only live life once
We can die inside thousands of times...
I know, you feel me
Respect, Hb
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Pie I made today
Frozen apples along with pears from my trees, wild blackberries I picked last August and blueberries store bought.
Added maple flavored monk fruit granules, a hint of cinnamon, egg washed crust. Okay I used a frozen premade crust, bite me!
Yum,
Respect, Hb
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Bb's ashes
On her beach
And in the window waiting for me to come home...
Gentle tears of love
Hb
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Prove of life
Complexed
By a unlikely
Smile
Hi
Let me c u
Respect, Hb
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Today
I'm no one
I'll try again
Another day
Sometimes being no one is okay
Hb
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@LakotaMan1
Some people fear our history and Truth, and instead of fearing it we should all be ashamed.
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Since Musky took I lost over 4000 followers. I want them back! If I'm not following you and you're not completely braindead (think fat Orange), I will likely follow you back. It's a respect thing with me, seem fair?
#BlueCrew
Follow up, like, RT
I'll grab ya.
Thx
Respect, Hb
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I will not be very active on this account
My small is where I will be posting poetry
I will check dms here, that is about it until I feel better at being a human.
@Alternative_Ty
is my small, if I KNOW YOU as family I will let you in. It is and will always be locked!
Respect
Hb
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My artichokes smiling today, I cut the big one and gave it to my 88 year old neighbor as the first one harvested this year. Dhe had last year's first as well. It makes her happy and me too.
Hb
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Mzz Willow says hello!
Just her and I now
Respect, Hb
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@molly_knight
As an Army Veteran I appreciate his immediate response, mission first. Deeds not Words brother.
Respect, Hb
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Ginger's son
Called this morning
And asked me
If I minded him changing his last name to mine...
Of course I said it was fine, he considers me his dad and I'm his role model...
Anyway
This is why I'm missing Ginger more today.
Life
Hb
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