I started playing golf in earnest when I was 14. My first love was lacrosse but my HS team was a joke and so was the coach. I couldn’t bring myself to play for him. The golf coach, on the other hand, was great - wonderful human, exceptional teacher and talented golfer. I had the advantage of having an older brother who was an excellent athlete so I guess he figured if my brother was coordinated, I must have some sort of athleticism. For whatever reason, he saw something in me and took me under his wing. What followed shaped my life. After having this account for some time now and not posting anything, I’ve decided to tell stories from my golf life in my teens through mid-twenties that I think may be interesting. I hope if any find you, they make your day a little better.

@andrewjcarr29 @LinksGems My buddy went to Garden City HS and that was his home course. I got the local muni…not that I’m jealous or anything

@LinksGems @MBGolfClub1898 You make a fair point. I’ve played extensively in the Met section and in FL but only sparingly in other areas of the country. My perception may be skewed a bit.

@rhenningjr @LinksGems @MBGolfClub1898 Admittedly, I haven’t played much in CT since ‘98, but from my recollection, CC of Fairfield jumps out as one I think would be better. MB would certainly be one of the better courses in CT though.

WHAT happened in the half way shack? In 2003 I started working at a different club out on the E end of Long Island. This club had built dorms on the property to house the staff since summertime accommodations were so expensive otherwise. So, the whole staff outside of the pros and the chef lived together. The guys who lived on either side of me were Lorenzo and Sean, both around 20 years old. Larry, as we called him, ended up working in the main dining room and Sean did a little of everything - which included manning the half way shack on Wednesdays when the regular lady had a day off. The shack was in the middle of the course - the nines didn’t come back to the clubhouse. The big news that fall was that they get a high speed internet connection out there so they could connect to the POS system used in the rest of the club via a laptop and not have to write and reconcile hand written tickets. In the fall, we might get 20 rounds on a busy day but the average was probably around 12. One day in October a get a frantic call from Sean out at the half way shack. “You’re good with computers, right? I need you to come to the shack as soon as you can.” I rush out and he takes me to the register where I quickly realize the problem - Sean has been watching porn on the computer and he went to a site that had pop-ups. Unlike today, there was no such thing as pop-up blocker, so every time he closed the window, another would pop up and he couldn’t stop it. So I ask WTF he’s been doing out there and he admits that when it’s slow he watches porn on the register and beats off. So, my recommendation is that you don’t sneak up on the half way shack on a slow day because if you do, you may see something you didn’t want to see!

@KelleyKga @elonmusk I hope whomever did this gets proper attribution. It’s possibly the most perfect 404 error message ever written.

@privategolfacs 14 at Maidstone. Saw 3 or 4 there through the years

@doc_gero I’m not familiar with the laws in DC, but depending on how diminished Biden’s capacity is, this likely meets the legal definition of elder abuse in FL.

@Mike_kim714 Being an uncle is the best. It’s like being a grandparent without having to be old. When they get older, be the fun uncle. Take them to the movie they really want to see. Spoil them to death. Feed them sugar then give them back to their parents. Take them to do cool stuff.

@caddietales Sorry but bibs>onesies. Agree on the +4s though

@caddietales Pretty sure once you turn a 3rd in a day you become a Sherpa

The Steamroller When I was in college, I started caddying at a very exclusive, well known club in the summers. This club was “show and go” with the first few tee times reserved for twosomes that wanted to play quickly. There were, at times, disagreements over who arrived first and would get the first tee time, which ultimately had to be sorted out by Tim, the caddymaster/starter - unless The Steamroller was involved. Everyone deferred to The Steamroller. So who was this power broker that all of the Wall Street big dicks deferred to? Her name was Connie, she was in her 80s, and she didn’t fuck around. I would guess that Connie had been playing at this club for 6 or 7 decades and may have never played a round in over 2:15 and always walked. She would hit driver off the tee (almost always right down the middle), take her 7 wood as she walked off the tee box and would walk up to her ball, address it and hit it down the middle as well. Just a single waggle and then swing. Repeat with the 7 wood until she was next to the green when she would take her pitching wedge, chip up and 1 or 2 putt. One of the great charms of Connie (at least to me as a caddy) is that she had no issue whatsoever with hitting into the group in front of her. To be clear, no one was ever in any danger - her ball would roll into them - but it was hit into them nonetheless. Inevitably, the group ahead would let her play through, which she would do with a polite thank you as she holed out and moved on - everyone pretending that nothing out of the ordinary had happened. My guess is that Connie has passed at this point but I’m even more confident that she’s still a legend at the club. In the over decade I spent working at private clubs, I’ve never seen anyone command so much respect from a membership like that little old lady.

@privategolfacs Jean van de Velde at the ‘99 British

@GiaMMacool Aren’t you in FL? Did you not homestead your house?

@515ideas @privategolfacs @undercover_pga any thoughts?

@BryanTweed16 All I have to contribute to the conversation is that I’m thrilled Bethpage Red is getting it’s due

@KelleyKga One of the few people who could bring trust back to the CDC!

@ryanmouquegolf Why not just have both shots in the bag? They have totally different applications.

@Bmcnicks Winged foot. You get 2 for 1.