Greg Poehler
@GregPoehler
Followers
17K
Following
7K
Media
555
Statuses
5K
Slightly more popular on Instagram.
Stockholm, Sweden
Joined March 2010
The key to happiness is to find something that you love to do. And then do that once you get home from your boring, but high-paying, job.
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RIP Madeleine Albright. First female US Secretary of State and certified badass.
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When I was 5, I loved ‘Frog and Toad Are Friends’ so much that I wrote Arnold Lobel a letter. My mom just found his reply in an old box of things. Quite the treasure.
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Next US Presidents: . 2018 - Trump.2022 - Snooki.2026-2050 Duck Dynasty.2054 - Honey Boo Boo.2058 - North West.
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Sweden is the best country in the world. Yesterday and today.
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I am not joking when I say that these spelling errors should disqualify someone from being President. #potatoe
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@realDonaldTrump Undocumented immigrants commit crimes at a much lower rate than your staff.
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OK everyone, if Russia wins Eurovision, let's all agree to make it SUPER GAY next year. #ESC2016.
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If you can’t be home for the holidays, it is VERY IMPORTANT that you send life-size cardboard cutouts of yourselves to your parents.
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Amazing that so many Americans are telling me what Sweden is really like. I LIVE HERE!! This is like me debating what you had for dinner.
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Number of Trump statements/tweets about fake Sweden terror attack: 50. Number of Trump statements/tweets about real Sweden terror attack: 0.
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Sorry, but everyone who voted for the guy who said he likes to grab women by the pussy has forfeited the right to be offended by bad language.
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Just now realizing that @EW screwed over Jerry in this picture and now it's my favorite cover ever.
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I can confirm that the entire Poehler family despises the NRA and everything it stands for, but, hey, cool meme.
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I’m fucking pissed at Eurovision. It was the easiest big event NOT to cancel. Just show every country’s winning performance in their own competition. Broadcast from a studio. Tally the votes. It was so simple. The ratings would’ve been best ever. Fuck you Eurovision. I love you.
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What a crazy fun time today on the @kirkminshow. Apologies for being so low energy. I love those guys and all the Minifans. Even the shitty ones. Best podcast in the world. Let’s go Celtics.
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@kirkminshow I’ve written the script. Not sure if it’s a one-act play or a short film but it’s electric either way.
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Wait. So "last night in Sweden" means "last night on Fox News about Sweden?" . You find new and innovative ways to embarrass us.
My statement as to what's happening in Sweden was in reference to a story that was broadcast on @FoxNews concerning immigrants & Sweden.
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I wish I lived in a world where this picture alone disqualified you from becoming President.
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Things I learned: Sweden is the Eurovision king; Australia is part of Europe; stages are windy.
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I stand behind this being the proper parental reaction to your kid’s state tournament victory. @kirkminshow
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92% of Swedes are anti-Trump. If the immigration problem really is as bad as he claims, wouldn't he have more Swedish fans??.
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Official statement below (in three parts). Please otherwise respect my privacy at this time.
BREAKING: Sources inside @kirkminshow basketball team have expressed joy to me over the rumored possibility that @GregPoehler will be flying in from Sweden for the team’s playoff game, as they fear the possibility of having disgust over going winless this season.
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40 years ago, my mom wrote my favorite poem. Over the years, I’ve come to think that maybe it’s the greatest poem of all time.
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22 years ago, Bill Cosby was the guest speaker at my college graduation and received an honorary degree. Yesterday, they took it away.
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DONE!
We can't let this happen. We should march on Washington and stop this travesty. Our nation is totally divided!.
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If I were a whale, I'd say "This really blows" and then point at my blowhole and the other whales would laugh and I'd get my own talk show.
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The year’s not over, but this is unquestionably the greatest clip of 2024. Bill Maher invited the Hawk Tuah girl to his basement, to impart some advice and hopefully more. Only for her to wonder if he wants to date her granny. I’ve watched it 5,000 times.
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Does anyone know the date that Sweden hosts Eurovision next year? Thanks in advance. #ESC2015.
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Finally in a boy band "@OGMolander: Got some American actor up in this!Thanks Greg for being a part of @thefooomusic
http://t.co/sfqAHTgiOs”.
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Too old and too slow but I appreciated the opportunity to lace em up one last time. This team will peak come playoff time. Good luck, fellas.
Team KMS Player rankings 6/13:.1. @kirkmin.2. @beanbagron.2*. @GregPoehler.3. @pfordroyals22.4. @CinemaLords.5. @joninwarren.6. @MikeMutnansky.7. @AndrewAugustus*.8. @KMSColeman.9. @Trudell_DM.10. @BeyondAvgMick. @kirkminshow @KMSNetworkMedia @Menners__.@BarstoolBigCat @JeffDLowe.
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After 18 nominations, my sister finally won an Emmy last night. Our long national nightmare is over.
And the winner, at last, is Amy Poehler.
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”Do you work out?”. ”Yes,” I said (thinking of March 12th).
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”Support the troops”.I SUPPORT ALL PEOPLE!!!. ”Fuck cancer.”.NO, FUCK ALL DISEASES EQUALLY!!. ”Happy Mother’s Day.”.ALL PEOPLE SHOULD BE HAPPY ON THIS DAY!!. ”Increase Mental Health Awareness.”.EVERYONE’S HEALTH IS IMPORTANT!!. See how dumb these sound?.
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Getting directed by my sister today. It took 40 years, but she's finally getting paid to boss me around.
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#tbt This cowboy and gypsy are on #welcometosweden tonight at 9/8c. @evilhag too (who is always in costume) http://t.co/VU8WJe6OjH.
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Out walking my dog, listening to @kirkminshow and enraged that Kirk let the Kevin from Bristol saga distract him from @ChrisKlemmer blatantly lying that he “forgot” about creating the Me & The Nominees website, and wait, what has become of my life? @DougStanhope @Shanemgillis.
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I'll always be able to pinpoint the exact moment that I officially became Swedish.
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I always root for the country that speaks better English so today it's Sweden over England.
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My sis was only 7 years older than Rachel McAdams when she played her mom in #MeanGirls. #MeanGirlsDay.
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I wrote and developed a show last year called Greek Gods with the great people at Funny or Die and all the networks passed on it, which sucked, especially since all the characters had names from the @kirkminshow
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Swedish Phrases:. God Jul = Merry Christmas. Gott Nytt År = Happy New Year. God Fortsättning = Just Keep on Keepin’ on, My Dude.
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Very proud that my sister is trending for all the right reasons.
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Hope the Democratic plan to ”rig the machines on election night to win the Presidency but not enough to give them the Senate so that they can rig them again a few weeks later to win the Senate” works tonight.
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@kirkmin The embodiment of the weird and wonderful KMS world, this (better) John Stewart will be missed. #AllAboard.
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(You better believe I’m retweeting any and all basketball-related compliments.).
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@RobbieCali_ @kirkmin @BlindMike_ @davecullinane All I know is I blacked out and woke up in bed next to Arcand.
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What if we permanently replaced the word "great" with "grapes?" I think that would be grapes.
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This girl (who I've been carrying ever since) gets a star on the Walk of Fame next wk. I'll be there, extra proud.
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A million women march in Washington. And ZERO arrests. Good stats to keep in mind whenever you're arguing about the superior gender.
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Yes, the best shows are when it’s just me, Kirk and Justin.
It’s been a week since this came out and my Spotify history shows I’ve listened to it 9 times. Lots to unpack but for now I’ll just say it’s my favorite @kirkminshow of 2024. @kirkmin . Safe to say @GregPoehler is my #1 third chair.
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Sadly, these 2 never hooked up -tough finding 1 in a million. But let the record show that the Poehler women represented, albeit separately.
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@kirkminshow @kirkmin Kirk, I’m sorry for coming up on stage at the Wilbur. I really wasn’t drunk. The crowd was just so loud. I sound like an autistic weirdo when I’m on stage. I should never do it. It’s nerve-wracking and stressful. I shouldn’t have done it. I just felt out of the loop.
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Imagine how psychotic and delusional you have to be to drug and rape women and then claim to be a victim.
Fredrik Virtanen överraskad av petningen från Aftonbladets ledarsida • “Vänder kappan efter den populistiska vinden”
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@JeffDLowe Mut! You are loved! In this world, maybe the only one. Not taking this job would be an affront to all of us who care. An affront to decency. Don’t let the “Mike and the Minifaners” win. I APRROVE THIS MESSAGE.
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Two years in the contest; two years with really good songs. Australia just doesn't get the concept. IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD.
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Son: Is that a man?.Me: Some people are born a man but feel like a woman their whole life. So they become one. Son: Oh. OK. IT'S THAT EASY.
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We have a President that is a full-fledged moron. Not someone who is uninformed or merely disagreeable. Not someone with values and opinions different from ours. But a complete and utter idiot of the highest degree. Every newscast should start with this.
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My favorite thing about living in Sweden is when there’s a total blizzard/avalanche and people just keep on living as if nothing’s happening. I just saw a mom pulling FOUR of her kids home from school on a sled. This place has figured it out.
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It's Sweden's NATIONAL DAY! Celebrate by not talking to your neighbor!!.
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The Stockholm weather has been spectacular for so long that I'm beginning to feel uncomfortable. Like I don't deserve it somehow. I guess what I'm saying is that I'm fully Swedish now.
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After much discussion, we finally decided to get a dog. Now’s as good a time as any. Maybe the best time. Meet Dexter. He’s five weeks now and we can’t wait to take him home soon.
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Sometimes I think I'm finally understanding Swedish culture. Then I see an old guy throw a korv and realize I still have no idea. #melfest.
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Just recorded an NBA podcast and, after a round of intense negotiations, the US youtube rights have been sold to @kirkminshow. Expect to be wowed.
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@kirkminshow Mut shaved. Called his friend to tell him he shaved. His friend said “good for you.”. Can’t believe we had to wait 30 years to hear this whopper.
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I feel like Wednesday was originally misspelled, but that person refused to admit their mistake.
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The rest of the world should check out the Swedish response and TAKE NOTES.
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