GoonerTalk
@GoonerTaIk
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Media consultant. š“ Clients: @Arsenal, @Nike, @UEFA, @UFC, @DAZNGroup.
London, England
Joined March 2016
Why is Danny Rose dressed like heās about to deliver bad news to Darth Vader?
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This Alexis Mac Allister performance has got Ā£70million move to Chelseaās bench written all over it.
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This turn from Martin Odegaard. Holy fuck that is disgusting. š¤Æ
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He signed both Arteta and Edu, so years later they could combine to sign Fabio Vieira and loan him to Porto, just to bring him on in the 80th minute and help throw away a lead against Man Utd to save Erik ten Hagās job and keep the comedy going. Arsene Wenger heās done it again.
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āArsenal still have to play Man City twice and they need to win one if they want to win the title.ā. No. Man City still have to play Arsenal twice and *they* need to win *twice* if they want to catch us.
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Trossard going back to his old stomping ground, getting booed, running the full length of the pitch, chipping the keeper, doing a full celebration and then patting the Arsenal badge. Hook it directly into my veins. Hook it into my veins and keep it there forever.
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Remember when this dumb fuck ārefused to answer Artetaās phone callsā because Arsenal didnāt have Champions League football? I think I speak for everyone when I say enjoy your 15 point deduction.
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Hahahaha everyone tried to spin a narrative of us time wasting for the entire second half, just for Opta to come out and say the second half today had the ball in play for longer than ANY HALF OF FOOTBALL ALL SEASON. You love to see it.
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Jose Mourinho: āI love this club, but now I notice the difference between big clubs that have history and others.ā. Spursā own manager has literally just admitted, live on television, that they are a small club with no history. Hook it into my veins.
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Ben White just chucked Cucerella to the ground, stood over him and gave him a death stare, repositioned himself and then scored. Thereās making someone your bitch and then thereās that.
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No debate about whoās the best Egyptian player in the Premier League.
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Reminder: Martinez didnāt join Arsenal because Arsenal didnāt offer to overpay by ā¬30m like Man Utd did. Reminder: Arsenal took that ā¬30m and signed Zinchenko - one of the best players in the league. Reminder: Weāre top of the league and embarrassed you just 4 days ago.
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Nurturing Luke Ayling through the Arsenal academy from the age of 8, just so he could eventually move on to Leeds and get himself sent off in a crucial game to get us back into the Champions League. Arsene Wenger, heās done it again.
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Romero grabbing Cucurella by the hair and dragging him to the floor is violent conduct. Itās a straight red card in any league in the world. The referee/VAR let it slide and Spurs score from the resulting attack. Cheats.
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Last season Rodri ridiculed us for celebrating a draw at the Etihad. He said City would never have that mentality. This season theyāre celebrating a draw at the Etihad as if theyāve just won the World Cup, despite Arsenal having 10 men and going 1-0 down. The tide is turning.
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The look on Aubameyangās face as heās brought off the bench, 2-0 down and 10th in the Premier League. Beautiful. Just absolutely beautiful.
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Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang is the best striker in the Premier League and itās not even close.
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The importance of Zinchenkoās attitude canāt be overstated. Instead of celebrating his equaliser, he urged everyone back to our half. A draw isnāt good enough for him - only wins are worth celebrating. This kind of mentality is contagious and wins titles.
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Imagine giving it all that āstay humbleā bollocks just to drop a 2/10 performance in the very next game.
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The most blatant offside youāll ever see, but the rules donāt apply when itās against Arsenal. As usual.
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Michael Oliver very clearly says something to Arteta as heās walking away, after they shake hands. Arteta stops in his tracks and looks back at him. What could a referee possibly have to say to a manager post-match that would evoke this kind of reaction?
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āThatās what we fucking do,ā belted out from Ben White towards his teammates at full time. A man of the match performance, an elite mentality, and still growing every game. People laughed at us for spending Ā£50m on him. Nobody is laughing now.
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Ozil dropped from Fenerbahceās squad in the same week Aubameyang posts snide tweets about being a āfinished playerā. Iām so glad weāve got these toxic characters out of our squad. Arteta is building a special atmosphere at Arsenal. He doesnāt tolerate anyoneās shit and I love it.
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Gary Neville: āDeclan Rice needs to get into the game in this second half, we didnāt see him at all in the first.ā. In the first half Rice had more interceptions, more clearances and more duels than any other player on the pitch. š¤”.
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The clock when Phil Foden shot to win Man City a fourth consecutive Premier League title. Who would have thought the number 115 would play such a crucial role in a title race!
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Overjoyed to hear former Arsenal and Crystal Palace striker Wayne Rooney is the pundit on Monday Night Football. For a moment I was worried weād have to suffer another 3 hours of shameless Man Utd propaganda, rather than focusing on the actual match.
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Kai Havertz was called a waste of money and the worst signing of the summer. He also has more league goal contributions this season than Bernardo Silva, Bruno Fernandes, James Maddison, Rasmus Hojlund, Marcus Rashford, Luis Diaz, Cody Gakpo, Dominic Szoboszlai and Jeremy Dokuā¦.
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BREAKING: Bukayo Saka has this morning tested positive for being the best young player in the league.
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The pundits said weād signed average players and would finish mid-table. With 4 games to go, weāre already guaranteed Europa League at the minimum. We have the youngest squad in the league and halved our wage bill. Regardless of what happens from here, Arteta has worked miracles.
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Martin Odegaard is the best player weāve signed in a very, very long time. We got him for a measly Ā£30mil when everyone wanted us to spend double that on James Maddison. Weāre in safe hands with Mikel Arteta. He knows what heās doing.
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If you think Rob Holding has been poor, just ask yourself what Haaland has actually done so far. Holding was clearly under instruction to get tight and hit him with reducers at every opportunity until he picked up a card. Arteta was applauding him. Job executed to perfection.
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Man Utd have only won 1 of their last 6 games, and Spurs have lost 8 of their last 17 games. Sky Sports havenāt criticised their results once. Arsenal finally lose an away game after 5 consecutive wins, and they post this. Hands down the most biased media outlet in the world.
Is it all starting to go wrong for Arsenal? š¤.
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Arsenal have won 2 trophies in the past 29 days. (1/8/2020, 29/8/2020). Spurs have won 2 trophies in the past 29 years. (18/5/1991, 24/2/2008).
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Mikel Arteta has revealed that he always saw Ben White as a right-back, but couldnāt move him there right away as we didnāt have another quality centre-back. As soon as William Saliba came back to the club, White moved to right-back. It was all calculated.
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Pep Guardiola just admitted Man City lost to Arsenal because he āthought the spaces would be in other positions and got it wrong.ā This is a huge testament to Mikel Arteta. He stumped the most innovative coach of all time and beat him at his own game.
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Obviously it didnāt matter in the end, but I still canāt get over Eddie Nketiah shooting in this situation, at 0-0, in the 85th minute. Zero football intelligence.
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āIād sack this lot right off, if I were you. Iāve won the World Cup so Iām sound, but letās face it pal the biggest achievement of your career so far is Millwallās young player of the year award in 2011/12.ā
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Look at the time on the phone. Arsenalās admin has us all on strings.
Don't miss a minute next season! . š Sync our fixtures to your calendar now š.
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Iāve truly never wanted a Man Utd win more than I want one right now.
šØ BREAKING: Ten Hag could be sacked if #mufc are defeated against Aston Villa in the Premier League on Sunday afternoon. [MEN]
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Hahahah Gary Neville has cancelled his appearance on MNF tonight because he canāt handle talking about Man Utd losing 7-0 any more. Fucking unbelievable.
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Iāve lost count of the amount of times Iāve looked at the Premier League table since this afternoon. Regardless of how it ends, this team has given us an unbelievable season that none of us expected. I think we can do it.
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Michael Oliver and VAR think the one on the left is a straight red card, but the one on the right is a yellow card. No, seriouslyā¦
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Fabio Vieira has been starting almost every game for Porto and, according to Opta performance ratings, he has been one of their best performers in recent games. Today heās inexplicably left out of their squad for ātechnical reasons.ā. Why do I get the feeling weāve recalled him?.
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People donāt talk about it enough but Arsenal fell off bad, these guys used to be deadly last season.
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I once watched Barcelonaās best ever team (around 2009-10) playing a 20 minute 5-a-side game. Gerard Pique completely dominated it. I remember wondering how a CB can possibly be that good on the ball. William Saliba is the closest thing Iāve seen since.
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If that Partey shot went in my head wouldāve fucking exploded.
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When you see that Gabriel Jesus goal back, pay close attention to when Anthony Taylor actually blows his whistle. Does he blow the whistle after the Kiwior āfoulā? No. Does he then decide itās a foul and subsequently blow the whistle when it looks like we might score? Yes.
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Arsenal 5-0 Crystal Palace.Nottingham Forest 1-2 Arsenal.Arsenal 3-1 Liverpool.West Ham 0-6 Arsenal.Burnley 0-5 Arsenal.Arsenal 4-1 Newcastle. 25-3 in our last six league games. I canāt remember us ever having a better run of form in my life. Mikel Arteta is a genius.
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āThat was not good enough for Champions League. Not even Europa League. We need players who have the balls to play in games like this.ā. Fair fucking play Granit Xhaka. Thatās exactly what I want to hear.
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I havenāt heard a single pundit praise us without immediately following with a negative. Arsenal are goodā¦ but City are better. Arsenal are topā¦ but City will catch them. Nketiahās goodā¦ but heās not Haaland. Arteta is a top coachā¦ but his touchline behaviour is a disgrace š“.
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Rodri stayed on the pitch despite about 5 yellow card offences just to miss the penalty to cost them the trophy. You really do love to see it.
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Everyone talks about the crazy fees Man Utd overpay for players, but Iāve only just realised how ridiculous the weekly salaries are. We pay less per week for Saka, Martinelli, Odegaard, Saliba and Gabriel COMBINED than Man Utd pay Jadon Sancho alone.
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This wasnāt even checked, by the way. 10 times worse than Xhaka on Silva today. No penalty. No card. Wasnāt even checked.
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Aside from the Invincible team at their peak, I have never loved an Arsenal team more than this one. Weāve got absolutely everything. This is a proper team.
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āYeah fair play to Zagreb, they scored 3 goals, won the game and knocked Spurs out, but with top players like Harry Kane and Gareth Bale, and a top manager like Jose Mourinho, youād still fancy Spurs to go on and win the tournament.ā
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Skyās football coverage is becoming insufferable. Barely any mention of Arsenal pre-match, but 45 mins about Man Utd. Every pundit backed Man Utd to finish top four. Post-match, absolutely nothing about Arsenal and straight into talking about Ronaldo and Elanga. Painfully biased.
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Gary Neville with possibly the worst take of all time. š
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Gary Neville in 2021: āI donāt know the plan at Arsenal. The recruitment is really poor. Theyāre really poor at it compared to other clubs. I donāt see any kind of strategy. I donāt get the direction of where theyāre taking this team.ā. Our recruitment:
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Premier League managers have screamed and gestured from the touchline for 30 years, but the moment Arsenal are top of the league and Mikel Arteta does it, itās suddenly a huge issue worthy of derogatory national media coverage. Funny that, isnāt it?.
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Obviously Iām pleased they didnāt get it, but this is a stonewall penalty. Incredibly clumsy defending, nowhere near the ball, stops Ronaldo getting a shot away. The level of refereeing in the Premier League is so, so bad.
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If we signed Joao Felix on loan, plus Mudryk on a permanent deal, I would start to genuinely believe we will win the Premier League.
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Meanwhile, earlier this season Tomiyasu essentially received a red card because he held the ball for 8 seconds before a throw-in.
Never in my life have I seen a player throw hands so much and not get sent off. Bruno Guimaraes shoved Riceās throat, swung for Vieiraās face, clubbed Jorginho round the back of the head and also smashed him in the back with an elbow. Three of these happened off the ball. No red.
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As the kick off was taken, 9 seconds before Bournemouth scored, three Bournemouth players are encroaching in Arsenalās half - including both the goalscorer and the assist provider. How has this been allowed to stand? Itās beyond a joke.
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Zinchenko is one of the best signings weāve made in so, so, so long. Crucial in two of our three goals. Man of the match by a country mile.
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Gabriel Martinelli is world class. Thereās no debate about it any more. Ordinary players donāt do this at elite Premier League level.
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Brentford fans singing āsame old Arsenal, always cheating,ā as Gabriel Jesus lays flat on his back with blood pissing out of his mouth after taking an elbow to the face. Single digit IQs.
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Just heard Arsenal fans are selling their tickets to Bayern fans. Firstly, why would you not go to the game if you have a ticket? Itās our biggest Champions League tie in years. Secondly, Bayernās lack of fans is a serious competitive advantage. Why would you want to help them?.
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Itās crazy that we can have a goal disallowed because the ball touches Havertz on the hand, but they completely ignore the fact it hit Cashās hand first. Why is one handball an offence and the other isnāt? These new rules are a joke.
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Hahahaha Bruno Fernandes begging Ten Hag to take him off at 6-0 down. This is football heritage.
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Mudryk has been trying to push for a move to us for weeks, posting about us on his social media, interacting with our players, ālikingā posts suggesting he wouldnāt join Chelsea, and now heās agreed to join them for higher wages. If money is all he wants, theyāre welcome to him.
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Seeing some fans turn on Odegaard after one average performance just goes to show how toxic our fanbase has become. We won a very difficult away game. The whole world was begging for us to lose and we won. Stop being so miserable and enjoy it.
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Man Utd fans have zero self awareness and itās hilarious. According to them, their manager is top class, Rashford is the best in the world, Casemiro is the best in the world, their defenders are the best and nobody can beat themā¦ yet they sit 4th in the league behind Newcastle.
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Hate to be *that* guy but does anyone else find it strange that since the Premier League struck a big money deal for PGMOL refs to officiate Saudi League games, Saudi-owned Newcastle keep getting the prime time Saudi TV slot (5:30 Saturday) and keep getting favourable decisions?.
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In an alternate reality, we sit 9th in the table after Emerson Royal and Onana cost us another game. Maddison missing through injury and Wilshere struggled to deputise. Lautaro now 13 games without a goal after failing to adapt. Conte is at Eduās throat in the post-match presser.
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Never in my life have I seen a player throw hands so much and not get sent off. Bruno Guimaraes shoved Riceās throat, swung for Vieiraās face, clubbed Jorginho round the back of the head and also smashed him in the back with an elbow. Three of these happened off the ball. No red.
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Leandro Trossard is the best piece of business weāve done in years. Bargain price, maximum impact. He always scores when we need it most.
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Lee Mason was the VAR official who wrongly disallowed Martinelliās goal at Old Trafford earlier this season, potentially costing Arsenal three points. Today Lee Mason was the VAR official who wrongly allowed Brentfordās goal, costing Arsenal two points. Lee Mason is a cunt.
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Trossard played a key role in that win. Donāt underestimate it. Over the moon with this signing.
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Antonio Conteās Spurs after 32 games: 60 points, +22 GD. Ange Postecoglouās Spurs after 32 games: 60 points, +16 GD. Yet the media want everyone to believe Spurs have turned a corner under Postecoglou, just because he plays more attacking football and calls people āmateā.
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In the last 7 years Arsenal have won 3 FA Cups and 3 Community Shields, whilst Spursā biggest achievement is a 3-3 aggregate draw with Ajax. ššš».
Tottenham Hotspur have now finished above Arsenal in the Premier League for SIX years in a row āš #COYS.
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Gabriel Martinelli scored 4 goals in 4 games with 4 wins in March and wasnāt nominated for Premier League Player of the Month. You have to just laugh.
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I donāt know who needs to hear this, but Thomas Partey to Romeo Lavia is a monumental downgrade. Partey maybe made a couple of mistakes towards the end of the season, but heās also one of the main reasons we were top of the league for so long.
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Itās fucking insane that I still see fans suggesting Arteta messed up by loaning Saliba out, because he could have played for us sooner. The only reason heās so ridiculously good is because of the loans. Thatās the entire fucking point of loan moves. He is 10x the player he was.
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Guardiola called Jesus āthe best in the world at pressing.ā Raphinha was the only player to record 30+ sprints in 3+ games in 20/21. Tielemans ranked 2nd in the league for midfield ball recoveries in 20/21. If we sign these players, weāre going to be a nightmare to play against.
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Baffling to see Trent & Toney as the heroes on the back pages today. They played under 10 minutes, plus pens. Saka played 120, pulled a wondergoal out of his arse to save us, scored a pen, named man of the match, and he isnāt even mentioned. The English media really do hate him.
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Man City are facing a possible points deduction for breaching FFP rules. Being completely honest, a part of me hopes they arenāt deducted any points this season. I want us to beat them fair and square with no excuses. I want history to say we won it because we were the best team.
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āArsenalās 3 games in hand are Spurs, Chelsea and Liverpool.ā. No, Arsenalās 3 games in hand are whichever games are played by the time the fixtures level out. We all play 38 games. The order of the games is only relevant for the purpose of distributing fixtures to broadcasters.
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Dani Alves calling Gabriel Martinelli āPhenomenoā is just about the biggest praise a Brazilian footballer can give. That name is reserved for Ronaldo and Ronaldo only. The last Brazil player Alves referred to as āPhenomenoā was a 20-year-old Santos forward by the name of Neymar.
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Arteta is challenging for top 4 with a squad that was only expected to fight for top 6, whilst fielding the youngest team in the league and cutting our wage bill in half. However you try to spin it, heās doing a great job for our long term future. Some of our fans are clueless.
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Please stop going on about Aubaās Barcelona goals as if weāre missing out. I couldnāt care less if he scores 500 goals for them. He wasnāt performing for Arsenal and he wasnāt contributing to our long term goals. Thatās all that matters. The end.
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Why am I seeing fans calling for us to sign Kylian Mbappe? Why would you want the most problematic, toxic player in world football to join our perfectly settled dressing room? Weāve only just gutted the squad of big egos. Stop living in a computer game and live in the real world.
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The Athleticās article on the Arsenal captaincy is damning of Aubameyang. The players see Xhaka as the real captain, Bellerin was our PFA rep rather than Auba, & Leno took charge of organising tickets for playersā family (Roy Keane spoke about this being a big part of captaincy).
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Donāt ever forget there was a time when rival fans wanted to debate who was the better manager out of Arteta, Gerrard, Lampard and Solskjaer.
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Neto swings a punch at White during a corner. The ball is nowhere near, so it canāt be argued that heās aiming for the ball. This is violent conduct - a red card offence - and a penalty.
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