Dr Grayfang
@DrGrayfang
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Will Smith said it best, welcome to erff
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Joined January 2011
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Pinned Tweet
People over 25 when Ludacris came out during the halftime show
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Prince Charles getting up for work for the first time in 73 years
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Me at the bar watching a frat bro in a romper pick a fight with a dude with cauliflower ears
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Ladies and gentleman, welcome to the least productive Friday of the year
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“if I stand up right when the plane lands, I can get off quicker”
- these assholes
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When that beer at lunchtime went down a little too smoothly
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150% chance that Sean put the shrimp in Topanga’s husbands Cinnamon Toast Crunch
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“you have become the very thing that you swore to destroy!”
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if you aren’t dressed like this all weekend, get the hell out of my life
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Never forget this legend double fisting beers at 9AM supporting his wife at the Olympics
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Remember Angelica’s doll Cynthia from Rugrats? This her now
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Russian generals that have to tell Putin a Ukrainian farmer stole their tank with a tractor
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“i hope this email finds you well”
how this email found me:
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Drank 10 beers for lunch. Feeling really good, best I’ve felt in 20 years! Don’t be afraid of day drinking. Don’t let work dominate your life.
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Shoutout to the parents in Christmas Story just chugging wine for breakfast
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Oh look, the three worst women in the history of television
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When you got a ton of shit to do but it’s 70 degrees in October
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*any NFL player does anything*
Cris collinsworth: I’ll tell you what, I’ll leave my family for this man
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Baristas when someone orders the first pumpkin spice latte of the season
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Sometimes when I’m feeling like shit, I just remember Courteney Cox’s hair in Scream 3 to cheer me up
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Did you know the weekend starts whenever you fucking want it to?
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Aaron Rodgers looks like he is here for the 5 o’clock free crack giveaway
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Everyone is talking about Bill Gates divorce but not who is getting custody of this fucking guy
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if you’re at work and see this shit coming at you, just quit
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Kids today will never understand what a bite of this tastes like
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A haunted house but it’s just people you haven’t talked to since high school pitching you pyramid schemes
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Dads getting ready for all the shit they need to build and put together
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A blue whale’s anus can stretch to approximately 3 and a 1/2 feet, making it the second largest asshole on the planet, just behind people who talk on their speakerphone in public
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Ever just get an email and think “fuck this shit til next week”
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“2021 is gonna be my year”
- me eating a rotisserie chicken on the toilet
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if you’re ever feeling like shit just remember somebody woke up and chose this
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