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@DBentleyMiller
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Solicitor-Advocate (Criminal) LLM. Bespoke Pen Maker https://t.co/7Lanxy7mCd
Earth
Joined February 2015
I just googled Missing Medieval servant’ and it came back ‘Paige not found’ (You lot really don’t deserve me!)
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Who remembers getting dressed for school in front of one of these on cold mornings?
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This little boy wanted @RoyalMail to deliver a letter to his Dad in Heaven. Look how they responded! 😍😍
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Saw this on the Internet. I have never willed anyone to be a millionaire more than this kid. Good on him!
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Whose mother had one of these in the house when you were growing up?
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Sometimes if I am doubting myself or feeling really poorly I will put my wig on and look in the mirror to remind this Council estate boy who left school with no qualifications and even less prospects just how far I have come!
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If ever I get sad or depressed I am going to look at this picture and remind myself just how far this Council estate boy who left school without a single qualification has come!
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Can you all please send positive vibes towards my best mate and big boy Rapha who is currently on a drip at the Emergency vets after becoming poorly
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He’s home! Very weak and now sleeping, but at least back on his own sofa. Thank you for all your very kind wishes
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To all Police Officers. You may not hear us above all of the noise at present but please be assured that there are millions of us in the UK who value what you do and are grateful for it. THANK YOU.
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Tonight I attended a 50th Birthday party, drove all the way there but stayed about half an hour then left. Got home and walked around my kitchen in tears but with absolutely no idea why. This is what living with a real life black dog can do to me BUT also to you. Be cautious
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At what age is it appropriate to tell my dogs they are adopted?
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Isn’t it strange that there’s always enough tarmac for speed humps but never enough for potholes???
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I find it disgraceful that in this day and age there are still some people willing to wear fir
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My Daddy is not speaking to me because he came home from Court in his lunch hour to walk me. and I jumped in the Canal. So can I come to live with you??
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I fell out with my girlfriend this morning, but before leaving for work she pegged the washing out. Passive aggressive status Boss level!
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I wonder if Prince Phillip has started to receive those bloody annoying phone calls yet from vultures in call centres asking about his recent accident?.
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Did anyone else get one of these? We had a Police man come to our school and ‘test’ us around the playground on our bikes before being awarded this beauty
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This dog is trained to sniff out those wasting time on Twitter
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I asked my Barber to cut my hair like Tom Cruise so he gave me a cushion to sit on!
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Please send your best wishes and thoughts to my big boy Rapha who is currently very poorly at the vets and will be in overnight :-(
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Trains and buses cancelled, people staying at home, yet Fred Flintstone still manages to drive to work. Let us salute him!!
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In other news. The worlds longest Cow has been found in Anglesey
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Ok then. Let’s see if there are any regional variations. What are these called?
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If you had cause to use these as a child, you had an awesome childhood! Yeharrrrrrrr
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Who remembers nearly getting their teeth smashed out by one of these bad boys? Retweet the love
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Why do we have military veterans sleeping in wet doorways at night when tins are being shaken by military Charities, often with millions in unrestricted funds in accounts for ‘emergencies’, stare into space?? I suggest a veteran sleeping on the streets is ‘an emergency!!’.
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If you see this car please ring the Police. It’s Stollen (Thank you fans)
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I was not feeling great today so took myself off to bed for a few hours. When I woke up, my two dogs were fast asleep either side of me keeping me safe. Dogs are the absolute best!
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I prefer the company of animals than people. Is this right or wrong?
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I’ve opened a new Restaurant called ‘Peace & Quiet’. Kids meals are £250
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Sat in a hotel and a child of about 8 has just told his mother to f@&k off! ‘It’s’ mother said ‘please don’t speak to mummy like that’. Let me assure you if I had spoken to my mother like that I would have received a clip that even Muhammad Ali would not have been able to dodge!.
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BEEN INJURED BY SEAWEED IN THE LAST THREE YEARS AND IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT? Call the National Accident Kelp line and they’ll assess your Clam today.
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A dog might destroy your shoes, but it will never break your heart
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FOUND: I found this cat in my garden last night. It was dirty and covered in leaves. He ate 6 cans of Tuna straight off so he must have been missing a good while. He’s also a bit ‘bitey’. Drop me a message if it’s yours. Thanks
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Suicide still claims far more lives than the Corona virus so how about you start stocking up on smiles and kindness before fighting over a bloody toilet roll?.
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Legal Twitter: isn’t it odd how everyone wants legal advice and then they recoil in horror when you have the affront to tell them they need to pay for it? I wonder if their argument would wash with a plumber, electrician, supermarket etc?.
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I have just unplugged the WI-FI box in my house for only two seconds and people appeared from rooms I had not seen for years!.
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Who remembers using this in the bath on a Sunday night before school the next day?
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How many of you got changed in front of one of these before school?
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IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Due to the cold weather, schools are advising Mothers to wear two pairs of pyjamas when dropping your kids off at the school gates. Thank you.
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Here is a very old version of Social media using a now outdated form of Windows
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Today our beautiful boy Rapha will have his very big operation to place a prosthetic tendon in his back leg after his own one snapped. It’s cutting edge surgery in the dog world we are told, so please send him positive vibes. Many thanks 🐾 🐾
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My parents had a TV like this. I remember because i WAS the remote control!!
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Delighted to confirm that I am now ‘officially’ a Master of Laws (LLM) and also had a distinction for my dissertation (No, I couldn’t believe it either before you all start bumping your gums!).
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@SkyNewsBreak We shouldn’t be paying a TV licence at all regardless of age. It’s a tax for us to watch repeat after repeat and to overpay ‘celebrities’ who would never get paid anywhere near that much in the commercial world. Why do we put up with it?.
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Sad news :-( my pet mouse Elvis died last night. He was caught in a trap. .
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So I had a bottle of Omega 3 fish oils thrown at me today! Luckily I escaped with only Super Fish Oil injuries. (oh come on! You likes that!).
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Don’t know if this is a scam but I just got a text saying I had won either £250 or tickets to an Elvis tribute act. It said press 1. For the money 2. For the show.
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If you don’t have a TV license you could be sent to Prison where you can watch TV all day without needing one!.
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Do you think it’s about time I had a word with my Doberman about personal space?
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Teachers should wear body cams so that parents can see how their ‘little darlings’ actually behave when at school.
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My old dad used to say ‘the first rule of the theatre is to always leave them wanting more’ Good man. Terrible anaesthetist!!
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I wish my dogs would learn that when someone knocks my front door it’s for ME not THEM!
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And you lot thought Yodel were bad!! Came home to this. I’m blushing.
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If you see me walking down the street and I start to cry, each time we meet.
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It’s a medical fact that if the Green paper towel doused in water did not cure you (regardless of what was wrong) then this was the next option for the medics
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Who remembers their parents engaging in this highly dangerous practice and how many times did the newspaper suddenly shoot up the Chimney?
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I have said this before but it is worth repeating. If suicide ever crosses your mind remember that I would rather sit and listen to your story for as long as it takes, rather than sit at the back of the Church at your funeral. My DM will always be open.
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When I was a kid THIS was my mobile phone. Who else remembers them?
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