Chris Jones †
@Chris_jones996
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20 and died in his sleep, u gotta grab life by the balls and make the most of it, every days a gift
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How the fuck does somone fall for that long
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Easily the funniest part about me getting veneeers hahahahaha
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Mad how ya can go pub on 22nd June but can’t get ya haircut till 4th of july I’ll be stood there with a stella looking like chewbaccas cousin
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Went on a date last night, ended up absolutly steaming together and bared from Yates for tryna nick the Christmas tree, when’s the fuckin wedding
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Waking up and finding out another pals been taken to suicide, I beg you check on the lads, ask them if there good an talk to them and let them know there still important, too may people hurting over unspoken things, reast in peace dale mate, heartbroken💔
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How Fuckin sexy is that
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Rather watch me nan get out the bath than watch that again
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If my daughter ever goes Ibiza and shows off to try and get Wayne lineker’s attention I swear I’ll row a fuckin boat to the island and box her head off, blokes a grade A creep.
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Cancel that wedding she turned out to be a psycho hahahaha
Went on a date last night, ended up absolutly steaming together and bared from Yates for tryna nick the Christmas tree, when’s the fuckin wedding
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You know your growing when you find stuff like this sexy
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Struggle unlocking me front fuckin door never mind a shower ad deffo drown ya daft cow
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If a came home to him in bed with me bird ad tuck the cunt in
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Some of my pals are borderline autistic and it’s fuckin class
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Not long till it’s 24 degrees we’ve just finished work and head for the boozer, ice cold pint, chattin shit in the beer garden with ya best pals till the sun goes down, hang in there troops it’s comin
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Fittest woman on this planet, full stop.
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When your showing your pal a video and a Snapchat notif comes up from the person you ain’t menna be speaking to
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Birds that drink pints and chuck banter at you like one of the lads are wifey material 100%
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When the bird at the afters that’s been flirting and sniffing your gear all night starts asking if anyone knows any taxi numbers
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How can you not be a dog person when there’s things like this
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As far as bank hol weekends go that one was fuckin beautiful. It’s been a pleasure
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At what point in your life do you come to the conclusion where you think that going on naked attraction is the logical thing to do, absolute fuckin fruit cakes
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Looks like a cute as fuck Mac Donald’s drive through
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When you take her on a date and she orders a Stella
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Mate if u can’t take your bird to the boozer with u n ya pals n get twatted together then she ain’t the one pal
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No sympathy for bugzy malone in the slightest, the NHS is stretched enough as it is and he’s riding round streets like it’s a go kart track, you play silly games ya get silly prizes, dickhead.
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When you turn up in grey trackies and stink of Dior sauvage
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Makes it feel like ya teeth are wearing north face coats
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When ya still off ya nut on a randoms sofa on Sunday afternoon and ya remember ya on the 6-2 shift tomorra
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When your mum shouts at you round the pool Infront of all ur new holiday mates
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Taxi to the afters vs the taxi home
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I’d love to see how many of u still fancied Aitch if he scanned ur bread and milk at home bargains tho🥴
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Imagine been there with the love of your life blowin their back out over that balcony, fuckin mint
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All my mates are borderline autistic and it’s fuckin class
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Wtf hahaha av seen better lookin in me local chippy at 3 am on a bank hol Sunday
Let's DO THIS! 🌴It's time to crack on with a brand new bunch of singles and watch them graft their way through summer...
#LoveIsland
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Anyone wannna chip in on a kid
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Most lasses now days can out-sesh us lads and tbh I think it’s fuckin brilliant
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Blondes are sexier than brunettes, Ya can’t change me mind
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I’d rather listen to me mother gettin shagged than listen to that accent again.
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Shaggin with a Jonnys like gettin a back massage with a north face coat on
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If you can live like this stay the fuck away from me
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Mate the way he even had to say “or will you be embarrassed?” killed me, treasure ur loved ones before there gone man❤️
My grandpa came to Starkville so I’m taking him to dinner.
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As much as Curtis has fucked up Hats off to The bloke Cos it’s takes a fuckin man to sit there and admit all that
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Phyco birds are a fuckin buzz, come n ruin me life darlin
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If you spend £500 on a pair of trainers and you only earn £250 a week ur dumb as fuck mate
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Swear people say they like Maccies breakfast to fit in cos it’s a fuckin DEAD meal
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I’ll give ya me dads fuckin house if ya can name me one item in that picture
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Imagine gettin t a point in life where ya think that going on naked attraction is the right thing to do, uve fuckin lost it mate
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Just grew the bollacks to check my bank balance after that naughty little bank hol weekend. Does anyone want their grass cutting or their dog walking 🥴
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When the comedown hits you mid rave and you dunno weather to do another bomb of dizzle or go home
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My man in the back ground “I’ve done so many things wrong in my life” 🤣🤣
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Mike Thalassitis is found dead in the woods near his house for whatever god knows reason and the papers are still calling him “muggy mike”, he’s a bloke with a family like any other, respect him man RIP ❤️
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Dirty fuckin coke boar
Wild boar discover and snort £17,000 of cocaine in Tuscan forest
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See this is what happens when you don’t bully the weird kids at school
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Folk that drink fizzy pop all day everyday ain’t normal uno, I have one can and it feels like me teeth are wearing dressing gowns
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Mate how peng is it how much this sun lifts ur mood, get ya fuckin tits at its 20 degrees
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When you both play fighting and u hit her a little too hard and try say sorry
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Imagine been like 30 n still doin videos like this, fuck off ya pink TikTok cunt
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Mad how there’s shit like this out there but us lot just wanna do maga n dam once a year
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Imagine havin a hards days graft n coming home to that, Jesus wept
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When you treat her like shit, cheat and beat her up but you sell coke and have a criminal record
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Ain’t no friend of mine if you get with my old ting, full stop
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I’d rather catch the corona virus than wear a pair of Alexander McQueens
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Birds that get onit n keep up with the lads are the unsung heroes of this generation
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Bet he still says mummy and daddy and wears bare Ralph Lauren
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Scottish twitters mad ain’t it, like tryna read fuckin daVinci code
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Doing something like that with love of ya life gotta be mad uno, need it
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Mad jelous of them couples that go festivals n peng holidays together , lyin if ya say ya don’t want it
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If i say “haha mad” it means I couldn’t give a fuck about what your chattin
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If she can shot tequila without pulling a face then she’s deffo guin a ruin ya life
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When she knows you sell coke n done 6 month for breakin ya last birds jaw
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Cannot wait for that feeling when your stood in the cue for a festival/event and you can hear the music getting louder the closer you get, all ya top clobber on with ya best pals pure gassed to get in n get a bevvy in hand, no better experience
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If my snapchat location is on ghost mode it 100% means I’m somewhere am not menna be
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When ya run out of gas n cook ya sausages on radiator
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Rather sit in the local boozer with me pals having a pint than in some dead out crowded club where ya can’t hear the person next you you anyday of the week, up the locals
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When you smell a fag after a heavy night on the booze
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You can be peng but if your chats dead then u ugly, I don’t make the rules.
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U know what, once u start voice noting there’s no going back, textings a fuckinn chore.
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Just me who used to get told me mum had run off with a black man whenever a asked me dad where she was like
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Bare gyal out here sayin they’d let tommy go 6 rounds on them but won’t even take a thumb up the batty
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