Old culchie women to Spanish guy at sandwich shop in Tenerife airport:
‘Is there a meal deal with the bap and a mineral?’
Spanish Guy:
*completely vacant Stare
Old culchie woman:
‘You think they would speak a bit of English at the airport for God’s sake’
Good-fucking -morning folks!! I’m so pumped to announce after two sold out shows in January, I will be returning to the SSE Arena in September 2021 with my all new show “Unbelievable”. On-sale Friday at 10am!! 🙌🙌🙌🙌
I love watching cleaning shows on Netflix whilst I steep the ‘good fork’ in boiling water so I can scrape the weetabix off it and use it to eat super noodles out of a protein shaker. 🤙
Had a great anniversary, the Mrs bought me
@COLINGEDDIS
tickets... And all I could think was why weren't they
@McCannMan
tickets??? Hopefully he can live up to Aaron's level. 🤣👀🤣...
#onlymessing
@NetflixUK
When are you going to make contact with
@COLINGEDDIS
? Never put out a comedy special but doing two arena dates in January! Have a word will you!!
I’m starting a company called ‘GymWhale’. It’s athleisure wear for people who want to look like they just came from the gym when they are retrieving McDonald’s chips from down the side of their drivers seat.
6 shows sold out. Turn-up, mask on, wash your wank mittens, don’t have flu symptoms, order drinks from the app, don’t be kissing strangers, eat the free pizza, laugh your nips off, fuck off home. I’m away to write some material. 🚀
There’s a guy beside me in Nero on what seems like a casual job interview and he’s definitely on gear. From what I can hear, he’s massively overqualified.
A year ago today
@COLINGEDDIS
brought 'Gedzilla' to a packed
@SSEBelfastArena
!
Colin is back this year with a new show, 'Unbelievable'.
Get your tickets here ➡
Fuck build ups, we just drop dates in this muhfucka!! Your boy is doing some super safe distanced gigs at the Limelight on the 3rd Sept! We have an early + a late show! We’ll have shits and giggles and pizza. Tickets go on sale tonight at 6pm from !
🔥Myself and Shane Todd are putting on a bit of a double header at London’s Legendary Leicester Square Theatre on August 21st!! Tickets on sale Friday at 10am! Tell your Friends!! 🔥