bbs
@BurritoBrosShit
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Following
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Statuses
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Taking the sweater off without taking the hat off first is a serial killer move.
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100 % Arabica coffee beans roasted right here in America 🇺🇸You will taste the difference! Order today at.
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If DMX started playing during a middle school/high school dance and it caused all of your teachers to run to the DJ to get the song changed, you’re a part of America’s Greatest Generation.
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Bro i am going to fucking go bananas at hibachi when this shit blows over. Finna throw dollar bills at the chef when he does the onion thing like we at the club.
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You know who wouldn’t complain about healthcare and compensation…
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“JALEN RAMSEY NEEDS TO BE CUT AND MARRONE SHOULD HAVE PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE.”
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Southern Dad’s ideal body rankings:.1. Burt Reynolds.2. Arn Anderson.3. Dale Sr. 4. Macho Man.
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When it looks like something new is about to fall into your lap:
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JESSE. WE’LL DRAFT IN THE RV.
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You can love your country and hate your government. That’s the most American shit possible.
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Papa Bear of the Berenstain Bears is a veteran, which leads me to wonder:.1. Who the fuck did he fight against?.2. How many bodies did Papa Bear stack up?.
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So much fillers that he’s starting to look like a cgi version of himself irl.
#Bucs QB Tom Brady on his 11-day absence from training camp: “I’m 45 years old, man. There’s a lot of sh*t going on.”. (🎥 @Buccaneers).
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That's the look of a brave five year old before he gets a flu shot. http://t.co/kngQ9wN0m7.
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If I don’t see this on the back window of a clapped out Silverado soon, I’m finna be real mad at Oklahomans.
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WE COULD HAVE HAD COLLEGE FOOTBALL IF YOU DUMB CUNTS TOOK THIS SERIOUSLY. IN MARCH.
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Waited all day to watch the jags give up a 6 minute TD drive.
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Just your irregular reminder that Hell Or High Water absolutely fucks.
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Ate a lunch of gas station hot dogs in my Bronco today. BROTHERRRRR
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Me explaining CFB jokes and storylines to my NFL fan girlfriend:
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I hate being the "what if national media covered the rest of the country like they cover california and new york" guy but Louisiana is still fucked from Laura and Iowans have been fucked for the last month. Get the fuck out of here.
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Atlanta would be the funniest city to invade because the invading force would never know which peachtree to drive down and the Altimas and Chargers are basically vbieds.
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WHEN DA FOOTBAW HOWSE LUK DIS SMAL FRUM DA AYUH, MAKE YEW TINK BOWT DA IMPOTENT TINGS IN LYFE. LIKE Y DA FOOTBAW HOWSE SO SMOL
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“HEY MAN IS THAT THERE THE NEW BRONCO?”.“Yup.”.“HEY MAN THAT THERES A BADASS TRUCK BROTHER.”.“Thanks brother.”.Every fucking stoplight.
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People were just BUILT DIFFERENT back in the day just by eating a couple eggs, grits, and biscuits and gravy and then doing a hard day of manual labor in the hot southern heat and then dying a couple decades later of a massive heart attack.
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The dude in the blazer in the upper left looks like he just saw the moon landing.
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Laundering money through a bbq sauce business and getting caught is peak Duval.
A federal jury has found former Jax city council members Katrina Brown and Reggie Brown, guilty of fraud, conspiracy and money laundering in connection with a Jacksonville barbecue sauce business. @wjxt4
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When the staff of your local newspaper gets gutted and fired, this is what happens.
If you have photos or videos from today's shooting at the Jacksonville Landing that you'd like to share, please tag @jaxdotcom in your tweet. NOTE: Jacksonville police ask that you DO NOT go to the Landing. Please follow all instructions from local law enforcement.
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You’re going to fuck your knees and back with a weighted vest that heavy and you’re weakening your lungs with the altitude mask during a pandemic that attacks respiratory functiona. @PFTCommenter @BarstoolBigCat.
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Ben Affleck’s plastic surgery is so bad that it makes Tom Brady’s new face look decent.
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Louisiana is a total disaster area but everyone in NYC is acting like it’s the end of the world. Love it.
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Pull up to K&G Fashions and tell the salesperson, "Fuck me up, fam." http://t.co/Z7vLZnys0M.
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Ben Affleck is too rich to look like he went to South America to get his plastic surgery done.
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"I can't go to sporting events due to parole stipulations, but you can using Seat Geek promo code: Ididntdoit."
hi im OJ Simpson im on parole and cant leave my house so i use stamps dot com insteadve going2 the post office. click on the mic & enter pro.
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I’m just saying… Shit was never this fucked up while Nate Dogg was still alive.
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Replace Stone Mountain with a Top Golf to keep white people happy.
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I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT TOO, IF IT WEREN’T FOR YOU MEDDLING KIDS.
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"I'm Rob Lowe and I have DirecTV."."I'm FSU fan Rob Lowe and I steal cable.".
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HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS IS WHAT ADAM VINATIERI LOOKS LIKE NOW?.
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What the fuck. This shit is fucking insane. It makes men that are assholes afraid. Men that are cowards afraid. It makes men that actually aren’t assholes aghast and embarrassed at those that are afraid.
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Jesus fucking Christ we got us a QB.
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FOLKS IF THAT SOCCER MATCH MADE YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT AMERICA, WAIT LESS THAN AN HOUR.
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Peak Caucasity.
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You dumb cunts. You stupid fucking cunts. You selfish pricks really thought you were smarter than a fucking disease. We’re the laughingstock of the world now and now we can’t have college football bc you people couldnt wait.
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More people should be killed by wildlife on our nation’s public lands.
A giant bison rammed into a family's rental car during a stampede in Yellowstone National Park.
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Can we talk about how the Jaguars played a complete game of fundamentally sound football today?.
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YESSSSSSSSSSS!!! RT@AceHudsonJr: Can't tell my man right here a Gotdamn thing. http://t.co/wbEIGbSbFB.
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Tom Brady looks at his injured teammates like motorists look at panhandlers at intersections.
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IT STARTS AT ONLY 33K WITH 4WD!?!??!?!?!?!?!?! BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
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We’re a country that collectively thinks our pull out game is so good that condoms are unnecessary. Let’s see how this goes.
"Conference-only schedules" is a very "we're reducing seating on the Hindenburg by half" solution.
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