Dye Data
@Artifence
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Data Science || Machine learning || Python
Nairobi, Kenya
Joined March 2021
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Pinned Tweet
when you are learning programming, normalize uploading your exercise files on github the same way you post on insta.
remote employers don't care about your certificate,
they want to see what you can do.
if you want a short cut, use chatGPT.
tumia akili my pal.
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Tell your kids to pursue computer science.
Huyu analipwa kama MP, hatoki kwa nyumba, na boss yuko Singapore.
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My friend alienda ushago akapata kuna msichana kwa boma yao anapika chapati,
Kuulizia akaambiwa ni bibi yake.
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Yesterday I made a voting bot for someone and he gained 14900 votes. He refused to pay. I added him 29 billion votes.
Dude was disqualified. Lol
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I bought my cousin a key cutting machine.
He has built his own kasmall house and bought a motorbike.
Today he sent photos of his wife's new nail spa.
Dude is too serious with life and he is just 22.
Relax and abuse drugs like your peers.
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Kikuyu single mothers will ensure their son gets their feminine name.
This guy was all hot and fine till I found out his name is Mr Muthoni.
😂😂 I cant
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Kama unajua kutumia computer,
Google majorel AI jobs.
Open an account.
Ukitoka job jioni piga task moja ya 30$, utakula nyama na anjera daily
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I made a habit of tipping our gatekeeper 50 bob everytime he opened the gate.
Now he thinks it's his right.
Ameniambia Niko na Deni yake ya siku mbili.
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There is a guy who has been paid several times by bouncers and club owners upto 1.2M because they beat him up. Guy goes to a club refuses to pay bill of 600, gets beaten up, goes to court and get compensated.
His former classmate is his lawyer.
Every hustle matters.
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Don't do academic writing.
Do data entry, transcription, swahili lessons, data science.
Simple jobs
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Yesterday I spent the night trying to hack into schools servers.
Who wants a degree from either tuk, mku, gretsa, mmu, daystar?
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Everytime I see a matatu with TV screens inside, all I see is underutilized advertising space. If you operate a business along that route, that could be a nice space to advertise it.
So Im looking for the best software to manage this screens with a little bit of IOT.
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Kenya is hard.
Men are being sodomized just to secure a job paying 35k.
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Buy a mifi. Jaza bundles. Make it open. But before anyone logs in to it, they should surrender permissions to text, contacts and Google keyboard. Go to a public place then thank me later.
Keep your laptop connected to collect that data.
Python is awesome.
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If you have a laptop and internet, log on to , create a seller account, go to microjobs and do SEO jobs.
1 task pays 3-5 bob but you can do in less than a minute.
You can be making 500+ bob per day within a few hours.
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Men:
Ukifika 25 please quit putting on airforce.
Don't force issues.
Get leather boots.
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A group of mama fua in ruiru bought washing machines. So they now collect clothes from people, wash them and return them. They don't tell their clients that they use machines because they will have to lower their prices. Smart women
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The landing cost of petrol is 50 bob/l.
Then the government adds 84 bob levy per litre.
Then you buy it at 134 bob to go to work which the government will tax you 30% on your income,,, just to go back home to buy food which has been imposed 20% vat.
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Nunua laptop ya Lenovo 8gb ram.
Weka Linux.
Weka proxy iseme iko London.
That's the secret, ata usijifunze coding Kama haikubambi.
That's the aim. Laptop iko London Sai ikona form Kama nanzenz.
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Men, if you are single bila job, start a "dad for hire" business.
A lot of single mums out here being pressured by their kids for a dad.
Your work will be teaching them how to ride a bike, play football, etc on weekends.
Be a honest pal to the kids.
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Two brothers, one in Mombasa and the other in machakos both died the same night in their sleep.
Tell me how this is not witchcraft.
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You mean eldoret express co cant salvage these buses and sell them as school buses instead of letting them rot?
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Before downloading a loan app. Delete all your mpesa thread and forge new huge transactions. Your loan limit will be higher.😂
They ask for permissions to access your messages so that they study your expenditures.
Show them you take breakfast at ole sereni daily. 😂
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Due to public demand.
I am preparing a step by step guide of creating USA and UK remote jobs profile.
-best US banks to link with stripe, sendwave, PayPal, mpesa.
-US phone number
-vpn/proxy
-best platforms
-certificate generators
I will share it on Amazon. 😎
Things "Ni God Maze" don't want you to know.
Buy a USA phone no and get an address
Open an online bank in USA.
Create your USA profile at and .
Apply for jobs as someone living in USA.
Be smart, unlimited opportunities out there.
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Things "Ni God Maze" don't want you to know.
Buy a USA phone no and get an address
Open an online bank in USA.
Create your USA profile at and .
Apply for jobs as someone living in USA.
Be smart, unlimited opportunities out there.
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Sai Lilian nganga would have been in South Korea with Alfred mutua touring Seoul, but she chose a 2 bedroom house pale eastlands. Smh. She should be used as an example in the next women's conference. Theme, "how to not let a sausage drag you down the valleys of poverty"
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These Gen Zs at workplaces that people call fearless come from rich backgrounds such that even if they got fired, their parents will make that one phone call and they will land a job asap.
Gen Z from a humble background stay humble at work. Dont be misled by privileged colleagues
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Kama wewe ni comrade and getting decent daily meals ni shida, it means kwenu hakuna mtu akona connections. So after 4 years, chances of you getting a job will be very low. The earlier you start a biz the better.
More people are graduating but the jobs aren't increasing.
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Avoid talking politics at your work places.
My friend wa kk has been sacked coz he forgot to switch off his computer yesterday.😂😂
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2 people with 100k.
One puts itina sacco and the other imports 50 pressure pumps powered by the cigarette port.
After 1 year, Sacco guy gets 112k and the pump guy gets 400k.
But there is a reason why saccos tell you to invest in them.
Saving is a poor man's investment
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The rate of unemployment in kenya is not because of lack of jobs but because people don't want to work.
Unapea mtu kazi kidogo ya data entry, but the moment they get paid, they disappear for 4 days, then come back with excuses asking for another job.
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If you earn less than 100k pm stop using banks for your salary. Tell your employer to pay you cash, mpesa or sacco.
The kra number you use to open bank accounts is about to become effective.
Dont argue with paye, income, revenue, corporate etc.
And in 2023 mpesa till pia. Wueh
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I stopped feeling sorry for Kenyans in Saudi. Last week a lady was defenestrated. This week another is being starved. The ones in Kenya are still applying to go there. Why don't you just apply to join the US army or British army?
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This why I love this app.
Nimekua nikitafuta hii template for a very long time mpaka the law of attraction ikaileta.
Editing skills kama nimeupload online.
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Unaolewa na bodybuilder unarudi nyumbani unapata alienda gym na thong yako.
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Part of maturity is realizing that some of your friends are avoiding you because they are poor. They don't want to show up like beggars. But they pray that when they become rich, they will look for you and rekindle the friendship. Sadly, it will never happen
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This is are the links mobile phone fundis will never give you.
You can easily unlock any given phone in minutes.
They update after every 4 days.
I have seen iphone icloud tools somewhere on the list.😄😄
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There is a fallacy going round that Raila was detained because of fighting for Kenyan rights, but the truth is he was detained because he was part of the team that pulled a coup d'etat on Moi in 1982.
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Tuambiane ukweli.
We need to hold a space ya kuosha wazungu. We share websites ya wazungu wakona insurance😂 ama penshen😭
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I have met like 10 tweeps. And all behave like amerix. Huyu i invited him to members only, then he asks about who is paying the bill. Lol
Lol. This is a members club, there are no bills here. Hii si mkahawa. Tf
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Life has this weird way of connecting u with the people u think about.💕💕
U unconsciously start thinking of a long lost classmate,,, then, 💥💥, u bump on each other in town.
Then the famous saying follows, "i was just thinking about u"..
#14DayNotice
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Fanya hivi
1: proxy ni 2k.
2: DL ni 2500.
Mbona mnabuy accounts 50k?
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Kumbe huyu dj wa twira gets 600 and a few drinks pale j grill.
Draw a better picture of him next time.
Earth is hard.
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Incase you suspect that someone has put mchele in your drink, pour a little on litmus paper. If it turns red don't drink it.
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buy a laptop for your US pal. tell him/her to create a remotasks with it. tell them to install anydesk/rdp so that you can operate that computer from kenya. this method doesnt need a proxy/vpn because your comp is physically in US.
one of very many ways to kill a rat.
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Passport ya Kenya ni at least ka 30k if you need it urgently.
ID ya mlami pale Tor ni 30$, proxy unatumia Gologin.
Kama Laptop yako iko London Kama mzungu flani, hio laptop haitawai kosa
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Farming inaeza kupea character development mpaka uskie kuuza shamba.
Huyu alipanda onions on 2 acres, hired 2 guys to irrigate them for 3 months to harvest.
Wueh, after harvesting, the bulbs were thin Kama pencil.
He donated them to nearby schools.
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Fck remotasks.
Kuna websites mingi that offer similar jobs. Homebaseworks na sigtrack are just 2 alternatives
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Data entry jobs only require Microsoft Excel. Kama unajua kutype uko sawa. They give you pictures of receipts and invoices. You type customer ID, product and amount.
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Stop spending money buying remotasks. Just get Usa credentials and open open sigtrack, talentdesk na invisible.
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I gave a tweep an online job to teach Swahili to foreigners.
Kufuatilia, the guy hasn't created a time table, hana course outline, hana syllabus, unaccessible online.
Most unprofessional thing ever.
And the guy had the guts to ask when he will start getting paid.
By who?
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So last evening after taking whiskey in rongai I feared driving on thika road so I went to sleep at my parents house in karen.
Now my dad wants to get me a permanent driver. Lol. I will be walking with a Aide De Camp daily. 😂😂
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Brickleberry, family guy, American dad, Rick n morty, paradise pd.
Unajua ingine ni watch?
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Remotasks proxy weka California or New Delhi.
Talentdesk na invisible proxy weka London.
Tumia browsec. It's 4.99$ per month. Gologin imekua expensive
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Remotasks US anyday. If it was a Kenyan account, kupata just 5$ ingekua an uphill task
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@Ma3Route
@ntsa_kenya
@NPSC_KE
@KenyaRedCross
@Mate_Tongola
Huyu ndio amegonga watu kwa hio tuktuk.
Hii maisha. You decide not to drink, unagongwa na mlevi
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It costs 5k to buy domain, hosting and ssl. Use WordPress to create the website. Use chatgpt to create content. Use AdSense and getreviewed to make doh.
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si remotasks pekee. here are a few more options. bora proxy na creds.
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Don't use the same Google account on both your phone and laptop.😅
Proxy inasema USA but carrier ni safaricom.😅
Utapigwa empty queue na umenunua account 70k
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My daily fuel budget is above your rent.
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Watu wa remotasks US accounts are overworking. They think account inaeza fungwa.
As long as you got a good vpn, relax.
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Men will eat whatever amerix tells them to.
Little do they know alisomea kmtc
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ukiapply hio job online, copy the whole job description uweke kwa AI. alafu ipatie company mbili itumie kumek work experience, na character yako in 3 words ya description. and watch it do gods work.
it reasons like 168 million brains.
usitumie CV moja kuapply jobs zote ka fala.
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If you want online jobs without a skill sema tu. Kuna kazi mijengo online za kama 15$ daily.
Usijifunze programming Kama hauko serious
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For those asking, this is what an annotation job looks like. You get pictures, label objects e.g cars, submit, get paid.
This data is then used in artificial intelligence and machine learning.
So these jobs are on the rise because artificial intelligence is the future.
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If you are applying for remotasks, nunua passport ya US pale darknet. Wamejua wakenya wanaapply na DL using proxy. Don't waste your cash buying DL za Pennsylvania
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Normalize entering a matatu with hot fries and chicken in the evening when everyone is hungry going home and eat them pole pole.
Last time i was abused in kikuyu i dont know even what that guy said. But he was bitter.
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If you know this onion site, we should be friends.😄
You either live in ruaka or syokimau and you drive either an audi or a bmw.
Rich pals of darknet.😄
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@harris_simiyu
A name is symbolic. Names shape character. Huyu anakaa kulala na stockings kwa kichwa
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On Saturday this dude friend of mine invited me for some drinks in a club in thika.
Aki Leon, you lied to me that your phone was stolen so that i foot the bill.
Ni sawa tu
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Girl.
Check on your husbands butt when he is asleep.
Most of them say they are hanging out with the guys kumbe they go to that club where they get paid 15k per shot.
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Kusomea computer science kwa university ni ufala. Kwanza jkuat. Mnalipa pesa mingi kufunzwa C na html
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When applying for online jobs, stop saying that you are in Kenya. Use vpn, say you are in norway. Then negotiate for minimum wage.
Tumia akili my loved one.
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once your lapi is configured in US. apply flexjobs, talentdesk na truelancer.
only take jobs you are confident about.
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Be very careful when driving while carrying your family.
You can drink and drive with friends, but not with family.
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Ruto and his group held a 3 day retreat. No phones were allowed in the meeting. Najua hamjui what was discussed there.
In short, filing nil returns has been removed. Alisema heri ulipe ushuru ya 200 kama hauna kazi.
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Shida ya kufanya kazi online ni hii mboka inataka ukue na quick meals kejani. Eggs, box ya noodles, bread, maini etc.
Coz a time offline is money lost.
Kitchen 2 minutes, juu pia haitaki relationships. Dem anataka mcuddle but kichwa yako iko kwa dollars and euros.
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Here is a list of 10 business ideas comrades can start with less than 5k at your free time with minimal extra skills.
Leverage on social media to reach more clients.
THREAD.
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Huyu got PayPal accounts but forgot to use vpn when cashing out. 6 accounts worth over 10000$ have been blocked.
😂 Pweins. I told him not to touch his laptop when drunk to avoid such minor errors hakuskia.
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Homebaseworks, sigtrack, remotive etc pay better than remotasks.
Remotasks wanaringa sai,
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Don't Google for online jobs. The websites that show up on Google results means they have high SEO, which means competition huko ni wagwan. Follow tech AI startups news, huko ndio utapata new remotasks hazijulikani. bila compe ya Kenyans.
@Artifence
And if anyone can help me get a link or 2 for the said jobs, I'll be grateful. The ones I've tried 😭
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Call me conservative, but I will never use the mpesa app to do any transactions. It carries a lot of risks.
Sim toolkit 4 life.
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When applying for jobs at invisible, danganya kabisa.
Your CV sema umefanya data science na work experience ya remotasks na selar.
Cover letter sema umekua supervisor wa ML.
Huyu fala ananipea CV ya nursing nimfungulie account pale invisible 😅. I will start charging edits za CV
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Kuna a client alitaka website nikamjengea na WordPress in 1 day.
My pal bado anajengea client wake 1 month later coz anasema hataki kutumia WordPress/wix.
😂 Ati PHP. Unajitesa bure, and I'm on my 7th client
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this guy after learning python for data science, he created a loan prediction app and presented it to a local Sacco.
now the Sacco wants to employ him instead of buying the app.
i advised him to take the job or they will get someone to recreate your app.
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sitawapea siri yote.
but, make sure the gmail account you are using ni ya US
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Also remember to change your timezone. Ukiweka proxy California, change time settings kwa computer isome Pacific standard time
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If you are applying for AI jobs, weka proxy silicon valley, California.
Hio ni sure bet.
Ukieka new York, machine automatically assumes you are rich. A rich man applying for a 20$ job pH watajua ni proxy.
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Talentdesk na invisible IP weka London.
Remotasks IP weka silicon valley.
Itakua verified very fast.
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I landed a gig of making an automated Twitter bot.
Pray for me, nishakula deposit.
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"online writing" is a cover up name.
Kuna Hawa watu wa online writing but nyumba yao ni disco daily. chat moderator jobs, imefungua a new channel ya wash wash.
Unatumiwa $$$ through PayPal, alafu unaambiwa urudishe kadhaa via Bitcoin.
Online writing na ukona BMW? Danganya maasai
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Avoid withdrawing a lot of money in cash over the bank's counter. Those tellers snitch you to goons out there.
Have you ever wondered how thieves know that someone is carrying a lot of cash with them.
If you have to, don't do it alone.
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