My friend’s entire company is locked out of their WeWork office because an umbrella fell, jamming the door.
No one can figure it out. It’s been like this for 2 days.
It's been said before, and we'll say it again.
If SpaceX can put its Falcon and Falcon Heavy prices on its website, you can damn well put the prices on your god damn enterprise support webpages.
Yesterday, in a tweet, we poked fun at the
#PHP
programming language. We apologize, and completely understand why so many were upset by the remark.
After all, if we had to write PHP code all day, we'd be cranky, too.
And so it begins. Fetching, for example, the website of US newspaper Arizona Daily Star [ ] from Europe results in a 403 Forbidden error, blaming
#GDPR
⚠️We are aware of an issue affecting the Azure Portal and Azure services, please visit our alternate Status Page here for more information and updates.
Imagine an app that assigned you a ten-plus-digit ID that can be used by any of the app's users to loudly wake up your smartphone so they can speak to you immediately.
And you're not sure exactly who knows your unique ID.
Would you install that app?
It's 2024. Your head rests against a cool window. Acid rain trickles down outside.
"How much for this article," you ask your editor. "It can't be for free or for 'the exposure'."
"We pay in Libra," the AI replies.
You sigh. Your breath fogs the window. "I'll take the exposure"
Let's play a game! Your porn star name is your first pet, then your RSA private key
We'll go first!
Rocky
-----BEGIN RSA PRIVATE KEY-----
n8aqnSpBAoGBAOSe/kaKPX2UglvQHFpfdkauK4v4YuPCcLBGEKMmoCzuEIl9Z5BjNWtga+hbBK/RDeeqdTHg6Z5e9ln6jpJ/JBF+AlwUVTTAoGANrf8SdKpFAU10CwaJkMsCIy (1/5)
Some say we're living in the cursed timeline.
But we imagine there is another timeline in which Microsoft has added blockchain support and rebranded its Windows file system to NFTS
FYI: Tech journalist Peter Bright,
@DrPizza
, who covered software and personal computing for other publications, allegedly attempted to arrange sex with children, according to FBI. He was arrested and charged May 22 and was due in court again this week
>2518AD. Earth is deserted
>Daily hustle and bustle replaced by cries of mutant wolves
>An alien fiddles with cables in a rusting data center
>A server crackles to life
>Finally, their terminal connects
>Onscreen, a box appears:
"To view this content, please install Adobe Flash"
FWIW: Bloomberg has, internally, a zero tolerance for inaccuracies, with several layers of editors checking stories. It is a virtual army of ~2,000 journalists. The Supermicro story today took months to develop.
Today's claims and denials are like matter and antimatter colliding
We go live now to open-source grandee and author Eric S. Raymond for his measured response to this month's horrific high-school shooting – and his views on responsible gun ownership.
Eric?
@oliviasolon
The spokesperson who said: "On background, no comment," then got upset when we said they had no comment.
"But that was on background only, and not for attribution!"
If the leaked screenshots are genuine, we're looking at a total compromise of Uber:
* AWS admin access
* G Suite admin access, with 1PB of data in use
* Slack
* Internal finances
* VMware vSphere access
* Etc
We don't ask for much from the infosec world but...
For the love of God, someone demo a new infected DLL or .so attack so we can finally use this "owning the libs" headline we've been sitting on for months
Free work hack for every reader:
Get out of any meeting by claiming you thought the calendar invite was a phishing email.
Also works great for messages about deadlines and feature requests.
FYI: Laptops given to British kids by the UK government to help them learn under lockdown came preloaded with malware,
@GazTheJourno
reports.
We understand a batch of 23,000 GeoBook 1Es running Windows 10 contained the infected units
More details:
Unlike the rest of blue-tick Twitter we weren't hacked
But if you want to send us Bitcoin anyway, we'll accept it and in return send you photos of us spending it
Feeling: grateful ☺️🙃🤣😇
Friends, we have another Huawei story coming up, and we can't think of anything to top last week's 'I'm on a Huawei to Hell' headline.
We fear it may have been our "Marge vs. the Monorail" moment.
Dear Red Hat staff, congrats on your new home in IBM. This IBM memo may be useful.
"Do not interact with [CEO] Ginni or the group unless they approach you first. This means no selfies, no bathroom run-ins, elevator pitches, or water fountain soirees..."
If a certain investigative reporter could refrain from outing the identity of Register article sources, that would be great.
We cannot comment further due to privacy concerns. But, we see you. And what you're doing is, as we say in Blighty, just. not. cricket.
A US judge has dealt a blow to the Internet Archive by granting a motion for summary judgment against the website.
This stems from a copyright lawsuit brought by big publishers seeking to shut down the online library and hold the non-profit organization liable for damages
This is fantastic. You know how YouTube and Netflix love to bug you, asking if you're still watching?
Why not bring that magic to tail -f –– with tailflix!
by
@freezydorito