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@s_findlay

Followers
1,710
Following
168
Media
3,012
Statuses
37,582

malort with a zed

scarbs
Joined January 2009
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
sports are so fun, I think there's blood in my mouth
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
I'm sorry but Marcus Stroman is an all time Toronto Blue Jay. No one has ever been so online and ready to fight always, even years after leaving. I saw this headline with no further information and was instantly like that's my guy Marcus and he is correct
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
my grandma bought a raincoat for herself that was too big, so she gave it to me and I foolishly assumed it was normal. nope turns into tiger print when wet
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
just because one chooses to fight Corey Perry doesn't mean one thinks he intentionally hit Tavares. for example I wanted to fight Corey Perry last week and this hadn't even happened yet
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
sorry are the cops parked on a sidewalk, forcing a guy with a cane into the bike lane, in order to ticket cyclists for speeding? are all the bike cops busy beating up the disenfranchised somewhere?
@WhitlaMike
Mike Whitla
3 years
Watch out riders. Police are ticketing cyclists for speeding above 20km/h in high park. #biketo
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
my final comment on Trevor Bauer for the evening ✌🏻
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
Hi. Roy Halladay was, without question or hyperbole, my favourite person in the world. I'd do him an unkindness by not telling you why.
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
Marco Estrada on the radio saying he's a Blue Jay for life 🥲 okay playoffs fiiine you got me
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
Jose Bautista could have tied this game 4 times over with his eyes closed
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
teams across baseball can eat shit or get vaxxed
@JeffPassan
Jeff Passan
3 years
To be clear: This is not just a Red Sox thing. Teams across baseball, sources say, are concerned with the ramifications of unvaccinated players not being allowed to play in Toronto. If the rules don't change, they could offer a significant competitive advantage for the Blue Jays.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I know everyone had fun this year, but I will never love a Blue Jays team more than this one
@DrewGROF
Drew
3 years
Happy holidays to all who celebrate
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
my one Christmas wish is that the Dodgers release Trevor Bauer and then also he disappears from society and I never have to hear anything about him again unless it's that his dick got caught in a bear trap
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
what if the Blue Jays just play each other for three months and never mingle with anyone else's cooties
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 years
this team might employ 45 pitchers I don't give a shit about, but at least they also have Bo Bichette who wears his uniform absolutely outrageously because he is a gift
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
Alek Manoah is so fuckin cool.
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
we still hate you
@BauerOutage
Trevor Bauer (トレバー・バウアー)
4 years
Do @BlueJays fans love me though? Or do they still hate me? 🤔🤔
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
name something MLB loves more than making sure the Jays aren't playing on Canadian holidays. I'll go first. that's right, it's making the Jays wear ugly hats to acknowledge American holidays
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I myself got vaccinated to participate in public health and safety, but if you needed to wait until you weren't allowed to get an indoor table at Milestones anymore that is also fine.
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
The Ford family is a fuckin' plague and if you don't view their potential resurgence as a moral crisis then I hope you forget to vote.
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 years
Hello I got a dog. So far this consists of me telling him "This is your house! You live here," every ten minutes.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
on this day in history ❤️
@JoeyBats19
Jose Bautista
10 years
. @simmonssteve who are you and why are you talking to me?
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Mike Pence should be booed everywhere he goes. At Hamilton, at work, in the street, by his wife when he gets home at night. Everywhere.
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
Doug Ford is door knocking in my neighbourhood today and I'm gonna sit outside and wait for him with an air horn
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 months
I've been tweeting about sports for literally like 15 years at this point and without question the most scum sucking freak asshole responses I ever get are from people name searching Trevor Bauer because they wanna cape for a rapist. Just wanna say @lindseyhillll forever 🩷🩷
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
I cannot describe how much Luke Schenn and Morgan Rielly being perfect defensive partners feels like someone read my dream journal
@NickDeSouza_
Nick DeSouza
1 year
Morgan Rielly and Luke Schenn are starting to turn into each other. What a playoffs they have had.
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
David Price is the best. Also the best? Nuance.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
the dumbest thing the liberal party does is force this guy to stay on script. he is so much more likable when he is kinda mean.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
everybody's mad about that other Rosie column but let's not lose sight of the fact that she is also terrible at this part of her job. just say one thing normally! what the fuck on earth are we doing here
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
"Blue Jays and Rays won't see each other again until September 15th" don't threaten me with a good time, Buck
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@s_findlay
findlay
9 years
JOSE "FINE I'LL DO EVERYTHING MYSELF" FUCKING BAUTISTA
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@s_findlay
findlay
9 months
the question that springs to mind in response to "Trevor Bauer wants to return to MLB," is not "oh no, is he still having casual sex?"
@Enquirer
Enquirer
9 months
Former Reds pitcher Trevor Bauer says he's grown up, not having casual sex anymore
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Kevin Pillar sucks and spending his years as a Jay not uplifting or encouraging or supporting him was truly a pleasure for me.
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
booing, empty, down by ten runs - missed u 2007 Blue Jays experience
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
Oh for the love of god, what the fuck
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 years
Nobody cares about how you're taking care of your customers, we only care about how you're taking care of your employees, please stop emailing me.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
Speaking of V Dub, never forget that his response to a heckler was to ask him what gas station he worked at so he could come yell at him while he did his job and then signed the ball "your favourite centre fielder, Vernon Wells." An angel.
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 months
more men could stand to take a lesson from Joey Votto, in that they should write me beautiful pages long apologies for hurting my feelings years ago
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
@MorganPCampbell that's a beautiful Fuck Around And Find Out for a Sunday afternoon
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
Rosie DiManno used to make me believe I could go to journalism school and write about hockey, not because she's also a woman but because she fuckin' sucks and apparently they just let anyone do it
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Since the fuck when, you goldfish-minded twat?! You let Jeter decompose at short for lukewarm applause in every park
@AndrewMarchand
Andrew Marchand
8 years
Joe Girardi: "My job description does not entail farewell tours."
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Fuck Kane, fuck the poisonous hockey culture that raised him, fuck the writers/players who voted for him and fuck the NHL for looking away.
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
I wrote this thing on John Gibbons, uncertainty and dresses. Mostly uncertainty.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
you invited Rob Ford on your show at the height of his obvious lack of faculties to take jabs and celebrate his catastrophic persona, dicknose.
@jimmykimmel
Jimmy Kimmel
6 years
What @TheRealRoseanne said is indefensible, but angrily attacking a woman who is obviously not well does no good for anyone. Please take a breath and remember that mental health issues are real. The Roseanne I know could probably use some compassion and help right now.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
Listen I have put up lawn signs in elections, I know it is a shit grind and it sucks when people steal them, but if you put up a Ford for Premier sign in Scarborough then you get what you get. And what you get is me taking it. Bye.
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
"May the 4th be with you" is nowhere near as good as "have an imperial March" and I think it's time we all took a stand about it.
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 years
I wanna watch Marcus Stroman because watching Marcus Stroman is fun and I don't give a fuck what beancounter business bullshit reason you have for moving him. 👊🏻
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Remember that time Jose Bautista hit a homerun so monstrous that the cameras shook while trying to focus on dejected Cole Hamels? Same.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
Robbie Ray looks like he should have half a pack of cigarettes rolled into his sleeve
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
the Shoppers self checkout has too many options to click through. you only get to make me scan and hit how to pay. if you're gonna ask me to buy a bag and donate two dollars and agree to a printed receipt you gotta pay a cashier okay, it's too many things I'm just trying to leave
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
I am firmly pro both talking shit about Randal Grichuk AND pro Marcus Stroman in general so that one is pretty easy
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
This felt too personal, even for me, but I couldn't say nothing. So here is this, instead.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I mean I was aiming for JP Arencibia but okay
@Vanessa_ABee
vibe instructor✌🏾🐝
3 years
🧘🏿‍♀️
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
you know who knows how to reach unvaccinated seniors? their family doctors. you know who doesn't? social media interns posting on instagram
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
the Catholic Church is a crime ring and their tax exempt status should be revoked yesterday
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
this one is my favourite because most people would've just let Steve keep digging his own grave but Jose took the shovel and kicked him into it. just so YOU are sure of it
@JoeyBats19
Jose Bautista
10 years
. @simmonssteve for clarification, no they don't....i tweet myself and that was me last night just so YOU are sure of it
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
The thing about The Dark Knight Rises is that it was totally fine and all of your nitpicky whining is karmically the reason we got stuck with Ben Affleck as Batman instead of someone who could play Bruce Wayne. (all three of these movies are perfect thanks for your time)
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@s_findlay
findlay
9 years
If Jose Bautista came to me and said "Can I have -" my answer would be "YUP" before he finished his sentence.
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
Part of Jose Bautista Celebration Day should be that Gregg Zaun is banned from television.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
The worst thing about the Leafs losing, and it's a long list for me, is having to listen to deadbeat clown local media dissect the fallout. I refuse to accept that there is a subject on this earth that Nick Kypreos knows more about than I do.
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
@Logancouture I mean you immediately followed this tweet with one saying you don't actually vote, so.. if you're asking if we punch people who are dumb and unnecessarily incendiary.. yes
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
things I would be willing to endure in order to sit by myself at a baseball game right now -an RA Dickey start -playing anyone in the AL East -Kevin Pillar takes 9 at bats -someone nearby tries to start to start the wave -you think it's the beer guy but it's the $20 slushies guy
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I don't really care about athletes the way that I used to anymore because I'm like 80 and have met adult men and they're horrible. Having said that!!!! Jason Spezza is a dream and I love him exactly the way I would have at 16 provided he wasn't a Sen at the time
@marnylandersen
also katie
3 years
jason spezza keeping up a running commentary for more than five minutes to help john tavares stay calm and awake - john later told him that despite being in and out of consciousness he recognised jason’s voice and knew he’d been talking to him
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Roberto Osuna refusing to talk to Rosie DiManno just makes me love Roberto Osuna a lot more, which I had previously assumed was impossible.
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
in fairness to Alek Manoah, I too would respond to a demotion at work by performing worse than ever before
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 months
people are like why aren't you as into the Jays anymore and I am like every time I turn the game on they are getting no hit by some stranger with two first names
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
You'll should have known about Bobby Orr the second you found out he was Don Cherry's favourite hockey player.
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
gonna do an announcement about how Trevor Bauer is a fuckin dickhead, get ready everyone
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@s_findlay
findlay
11 months
we hate you but I assure you that isn't why
@BauerOutage
Trevor Bauer (トレバー・バウアー)
11 months
But do Toronto fans love me? I thought they hated me after the 2016 playoffs
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Stoked to see Ontario schools are following Major League Baseball's reopening plan of "we're just fuckin' doing it, buds."
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Very Dan O'Toole of the Mets to suggest via vague statement that Yoenis Cespedes was missing when it turns out he was safe and sound and away from the Mets.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
I swear to god if I don't get an insincere screencap of the Notes app from Josh Donaldson about how much he loved Toronto
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Randal no one likes you already, don't make it worse
@RGrich15
Randal Grichuk
4 years
@BauerOutage Yooo Trev, I think you need to come north of the boarder! Toronto fans would really love you.. just sayin..
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Blue Jays chasing free agents like I watched Breaking Bad: sometimes I just tell people I did so they don't get mad or talk to me about it.
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@s_findlay
findlay
10 months
btw a rushed 6pm press conference on a Friday means the mayor cheated on his wife not that the biggest free agent in baseball history is signing in your city. just FYI. so we're all on the same page administratively
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
do the Blue Jays not know how many A) better B) cooler C) funnier D) less openly cunty baseball players there are than Trevor Bauer
@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
do people not know how many A) better B) cooler C) funnier D) less openly cunty baseball players there are than Trevor Bauer? not knowing your other options is the only excuse for dying on that particular hill
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
Women don't like sports because men are screaming nightmare children who never, ever shut their pieholes.
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
@jparencibia9 @JesRey7 k you're not allowed to make videos about getting bullied online when you deserve it, though
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
I didn't say it, Josh Donaldson did. I'll say this, though: get right fucked.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I am gonna be on my deathbed having forgotten the names of all my friends and family but still knowing every word of Forgot About Dre
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Did I just mutter "suck it Pedroia, you rat fuck" to no one while standing alone at my six-year-old nephew's birthday? Who can say for sure.
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@s_findlay
findlay
7 years
just tell me what street I'm under, jesus fuck
@blogTO
blogTO
7 years
It just got easier to get around in the #PATH
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
I wish the Yankees and Red Sox being good made me want to go to the gym instead of making me want to lie down and die
@STR0
Marcus Stroman
6 years
Machado is going to the Yankees. Yankees go out and get everyone. Red Sox are lethal. Rays are dangerous. Can never sleep on the Orioles. I’m going to the gym. Gonna be in my zone all year. Excited to compete in the best division in baseball! #ALEast
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 months
@JustJem24 which part of the spectrum does "bizarrely comfortable with participating in the cover up of an affair within the friend group" land on, is it close to the ADD side orrrr
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@s_findlay
findlay
2 years
sometimes I remember when I first started liking sports and was very careful to make sure men didn't think it was because I thought everyone was cute. what a waste of time everyone is SO CUTE
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
I NEED Marcus Stroman to hate Trevor Bauer. Like physically need it in my heart
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@s_findlay
findlay
1 year
I hope Brian Burke beats the shit out of Eric Staal in a barn somewhere. Happy Thanksgiving.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 months
People think the Panthers blowing a 3-0 lead would be funny but like. Not as funny as Corey Perry continually signing and losing with the #2 team every year at the end of his career like the embodiment of some witch's curse
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
Captain Holt is the best character on TV and the death of Brooklyn 99 is a travesty.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
Thank fuck. See ya never, dickhead. ✌🏻
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
I had a very bad day and one of my friends took very good care of me by doing a bunch of stuff that I'm sure was nothing to him but was huge to me. Do small things with great love and take care of your people. Or just come drink beers in the park. ✌🏻
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
If Gregg Zaun were still playing baseball, six Texas Rangers would be dead right now.
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Hi, Canada? If you see racist garbage stapled to trees, consider taking it down instead of photographing it for people to retweet.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
BREAKING no camping BREAKING the pet store is closed BREAKING don't go outside but also don't stay inside BREAKING exist in a void BREAKING don't go to work 😉😉😉 BREAKING get ready to chase the ice cream truck from Twisted Metal around your hot spot neighbourbood for a vaccine
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@s_findlay
findlay
9 years
Uhh this story about an ongoing baboon fight for supremacy at the Toronto Zoo is insane. You're welcome
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
I can't believe I went to bed a normal person and woke up having to love Joe Kelly.
@cjzero
CJ Fogler account may or may not be notable
4 years
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@s_findlay
findlay
8 years
Pour out your energy drink and solemnly crush the can on your forehead.
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@s_findlay
findlay
3 years
I will never ever ever in my long legged life love a team as much as those terrible Jays ones that were only worth watching once every 5 days. ❤
@PitchingNinja
Rob Friedman
3 years
Roy Halladay, Front Door Two Seamers. 😯
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@s_findlay
findlay
4 years
Portnoy claiming to not understand why people think Barstool is full of clowns is A) hilarious and B) a great reminder to check your clown friends. They're like if every guy you didn't bother telling to shut the fuck up unionized and spent their dues on harassment classes.
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@s_findlay
findlay
6 years
Stroman mouths off (correctly) about the team being garbage and I gotta hear about it 80 ways from Sunday from everyone who has ever held a microphone, but we're sticking with the team statements about a domestic abuser. Cool yup good choice for nose/grindstone.
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@s_findlay
findlay
5 years
When people like Christie Blatchford die, it reminds me that the literal only thing I care about anyone saying about me is that I was kind. I don't want anyone pretending to care about my job or my accomplishments or a thing but whether or not I was nice to them.
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