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@philpapi_
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Following
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Kendrick
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Sunday Night Football
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Dawg is the ice cream machine fixed
Meet McDonald's new uniform created by celebrity designer Waraire Boswell
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Women went to a concert, loved it, and are now going to see a movie about the concert that they saw. So y'all do understand highlights lmao welcome
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Bitches with good pussy always think you gon drop everything you doing & hop in the car soon as they invite you over lol first of all, did you eat & do you want anything from the store
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*overheard in labor & delivery*
A: I gave you a whole ass baby & you didn't bring me shit. No flowers no nothing. You just walk in wit that goofy grin & Cheetos.
B: now you don't like hot Cheetos lol aight man
LMFAO
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*End of the night drunk negotiations outside the club/bar*
Her: Idk. I mean… I guess I can come but I have to work early. Are you gonna get up on time to bring me back?
Me:
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40 gon need a documentary when it’s all said & done.
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"Im outside I think"
"Here I come"
Ant Edwards in the building... Timberwolves looking to force a Game 7!
DEN-MIN: 8:30pm/et on ESPN
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"Damn she fine as hell, I want an everlasting friendship with her" - No nigga, ever
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Draya in the kitchen after reading her mentions & snap comments
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Warren Sapp talking bout these kids gave him a reason to live, nigga give them a reason to shed a block got damn
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Aight man y’all talking a lil too damn much at this table ..
Jada Pinkett Smith Says She Was Addicted to Porn Before Meeting Will Smith
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My 80 yr old aunt requested Drake & Cardi B on her bday playlist and the family is having a fit tryna find appropriate songs 😭😭😭😭😭😭
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Why jobs & schools be thinking they can pizza-party yo ass to death & that make everything ok? I mean I'ma eat it, but still
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Me:
Rotisserie chicken on sale: Hey
Me: Fa sho, let's go
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Man I'll never forget my mama called me in the room Cherokee was on the screen she said what's this I just start crying
........so y’all used to jack off while sitting at your family’s desktop computer? deadass?
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Rugrats in Paris. Orange. If you know you know
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When she got a studio apartment & you only need bout 15 roses for this >
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Heavenly Father please send a bitch that understand I cannot text in surgery. So tired of having this conversation
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Nicki not understanding Quavo silence when she went mute when the whole world tried to destroy Drake credibility is too funny to me..
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Gisele new nigga used to be at they crib teaching then karate n shit? Lmfao don’t put nothing past nobody dawg 😭😭 sickening.
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Saw a couple at the park sitting on a blanket eating Popeyes together. Couldn't imagine what else love is supposed to look like
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Me, explaining to a patient I wasn't in the OR so I really don't know how it went but they alive & that's a good place to start
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@__Rocka
Fa sho that's understandable I just get irritated you know they be picking on him lol & I'm just like.. am I the only one who remembers? Y'all loved that nigga
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Teach these dumbass niggas Baldy!!!!
.
@UMichFootball
@blakecorum_24
is love this play at CFB and NFL. Always seems to create confusion.
#BigBlue
@rosebowl2024
#BaldysBreakdowns
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Taking your time to get to know each other >
Tennis star Rafael Nadal gets engaged to girlfriend of 14 years, Mery Perello
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If I gotta text "hey big sis y'all good" to yo girl you dead to me don't even come home
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Aye let em fight I’m still pulling the string when it’s my stop
This. Is. Spirit Airlines. (IG/my_yannacondadont)
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Lord whatever you are cooking outside please understand that it is done
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Got the offer 🙏🏾better pay, regular hours with no weekends, same benefits, & they're gonna pay for my classes to get my certification. A nigga been praying for this so hard dawg y'all don't even know... thank you God
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Lala always look like she irritated wit Melo lmaooooo
Basketball is family 🙌
Melo got a special facetime call from his son, Kiyan, after he dropped a season-high 25 points.
(via
@trailblazers
)
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Imagine demanding another adult be responsible for your peace lmao grow up.
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My shorty just got a job offer that's Gon almost double her salary and the timing couldn't be better cus I just decided we pregnant 🥰
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Rent paid so don't disrespect me by asking what I'm bringing to the cookout this weekend. I'm bringing me, dawg.
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106th & Park used to play the same 10 videos everyday & my ass was tuned in each time lmfao dope show
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I experienced a Michigan football National Championship & a Lions playoff win in the same week. I can't believe this is my life
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Doc Rivers really go in the shop & get his skin lined up
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Wayne: I like a long-haired, thick redbone. Open up her legs & filet mignon that pwussy. I'ma get in & on that pwussy. If she let me in, I'ma own that pwussy
14 year old me:
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Apologized to Kim K for waking up late then I got to it
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Pulling up to your parents crib & getting a free meal & good life advice always gon be dope.
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Tasha pussy sent a nigga smooth outta town in 24 hours… Don’t ever compare her to Ms Valdez again.
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"Naw naw nigga since you so fucking funny on the TL go make the bitch laugh now"
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My boy on vacation with his lady: “Traveling with a whore > traveling with a good woman” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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“I’ma call you back” ain’t got no time frame on it. Shit might be a month from now, ion know. I do know I wanna get off this phone wit you lol
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You & yo budget when y'all realize you fucking with a girl that likes to eat
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Idc "I'll show em how to network. Fuck that Netflix & Chill, what's yo net worth?" one of the hardest bars to me lmfao
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I love this show RT
@NOTSCWill
: Charles Barkley's mocking of ESPN is one of the funniest things I've heard all year
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Ja came "I miss my gma" in the midst of a controversy.... Boy smarter than I thought I wasn't familiar with his game
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My mom got a big surgery going on today. Would appreciate a prayer for her if you got a moment this morning
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Long as you know my boy ain’t never talked bout no girl the way he talk bout you sis
I’ve never looked at my nigga friends as my friends. Y’all my opps actually😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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Have more uncomfortable conversations. Relationships fail because of unexpressed expectations.
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This the look she give her friends when they ask “are you really bout to go home wit this nigga?” Lmao
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Can y'all please pray for me. Ain't nothing wrong, I just don't wanna be at work
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10 mins after yo mans got in the car without a word, you hear "I hate this bitch" & look to the right
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Whenever a girl ask me to open sumn I channel energy from all the fellas around the world like a spirit bomb 😭😭😭 this shit Gon get opened even if I gotta die
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Niggas really think “it’s gon be 10 mins on spicy” Gon make me drive away lol okay that’s fine. So what’s good how yo shift been
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Detroit girls vs Hairstylists one of my favorite battles to watch.
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Like you took the SAT for D Rose
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Steph ain’t nothing but Eddie House with a green light & his own shoe…
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Nicole Ari Parker: I just haven’t been feeling as wanted lately I miss getting a lot of attention like I did when we were dating
Boris: Wonder if we got anymore of this dip in the kitchen
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LMAO! RT
@The2nd_JEH
:
#2013faves
RT
@SadderDaniel
I know racism when I see it
http://t.co/Oka7hdLvqb
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Y’all ain’t gon preciate island Drake til it’s 2045 & yo wife talked you into one of them Tom Joyner cruises & bingo night get lit cus the DJ cut on Blem. But I ain’t gon say nothing else
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It's coming. It's gonna be the 81 walk off or Game 7 scorer's table, tho.
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My head coach slapped a white man & then took his team to the Sweet 16 we are NOT the same lmfaooooo it ain’t for everybody!!!!!
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When your dasher makes a wrong turn & you now know the warmth of your food is in jeopardy
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Child abandonment is a felony sis. I don't think a more sufficient excuse exists lol
Why do adults think that not being able to find childcare is a sufficient excuse to miss work ???!!!
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$80 for lunch
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I hate the "you act different around yo friends" shit... No I'm myself when I'm wit my niggas. I act different around you.
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My uncle drunk talmbout he been married 55 years but don’t believe the hype it ain’t that hard cus once you lose yo hearing they way easier to deal wit 😭😭😭
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A good "naw babe it's cool foreal" to get her riled up for the waitress >>>>>>>>>>>
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I’m here to tell you right now… ain’t none of y’all new faves rapping like this 😂😂😂
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Free my nigga Kobe dawg what the fuck
Police in Belfast, Maine, made an unusual arrest over the weekend.
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Questlove having Dababy in a dream music festival lineup is really concerning.
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The use of Lauren & Nip’s relationship as a reference to showcase what you think are some shortcomings of the opposite sex is an odd thing to takeaway from all of this.
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Trey: Smooth Saturday. Ima catch a nap real quick, lowkey tired.
*wakes up*
Nicki: You indirectly lying on yo dick nigga
Trey:
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