Witty Librarian 2024
@PaulWartenberg
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Following
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Statuses
205,605
Librarian, writer, Xer punk. Always sober never sane. #IStandWithUkraine #HarrisWalz2024 Buy my books pleasethanks.
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Joined July 2010
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jungkook
• 890346 Tweets
Arsenal
• 589713 Tweets
#خلصوا_صفقات_الهلال2
• 328271 Tweets
#HAPPYJKDAY
• 308195 Tweets
#StandingNextToJK
• 238079 Tweets
#NeverLetJKGo
• 233315 Tweets
#GlobalPopStarJKDay
• 228980 Tweets
#พรชีวันตอนจบ
• 191439 Tweets
Rice
• 157563 Tweets
Brighton
• 105382 Tweets
Ticketmaster
• 102270 Tweets
#SixTONESANN
• 83738 Tweets
ポムの樹
• 40039 Tweets
Joao Pedro
• 36413 Tweets
#상병_전정국_생일축하해
• 36237 Tweets
#Venue101
• 28451 Tweets
McLaren
• 24408 Tweets
すいちゃん
• 21406 Tweets
ALL ROUNDER YUJIN DAY
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Veltman
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エネルギー補給
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Joe Root
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Chris Kavanagh
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Cubarsi
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Clemson
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ブライトン
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バトルシップ
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#SHUNTO_HBD_21st
• 10311 Tweets
飛び降り
• 10039 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
just a reminder again to Republicans:
Back in 2016, you could have gone with ANYONE else as a candidate - Jeb, Christie, Rubio, Kasich, Walker, gods help us even Cruz - and you'd have gotten the same amount of culture war BS you get now.
But no. YOU WENT WITH THE BUSINESS FRAUD.
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President Carter, after leaving the White House, spent 40-plus years building homes and defending the right to vote. Arguably the greatest post-presidency any man ever lived.
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@paulswhtn
I hope they got age restriction settings on there. I don't want my parents watching sex on Disney.
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@ameliaelizalde
sorry about the dumped part.
you don't need games to distract you.
you need fluffy animal pictures.
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@ChaChingChizzy
an honest father has to live with the possibility of fighting a son, not out of rage or pride but if only to teach the boy how to choose his battles well.
It's the "How to Hump" search that would worry me.
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@BFriedmanDC
I voted for women at all levels of elections, and I'm 99.44 percent sure I'm still a guy.
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@etuckerAP
"Presidential Harassment."
What was the Republican Congress' treatment of Obama from 2010 onward, playful banter???
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@NPR
@nhannahjones
the postmaster is NOT shaking things up.
the postmaster is dismantling and destroying the Postal Service.
please use the correct verbs.
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@BBCEarth
that's how it starts, with the oohing and the ahhing. then comes the screaming and the running...
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I see "She's 19" is trending and I'm worried Matt Gaetz is trolling the Florida Panhandle for dates.
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@emptywheel
he's intentionally doxxing the FBI agents. I hope they charge him with intimidation.
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@tokyorav
I still remember seeing the early clips of Cloverfield movie and I was thinking "would people REALLY stop and video record a freaking KAIJU during a rampage" and ten+ years later I realize JJ and crew were ahead of the curve.
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@publicroad
Wait is he saying to take the vaccine to OWN THE LIBS?
...
...
this might actually work...
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@AngryBlackLady
Scalia stayed on the bench even though it was clear his health had been failing for some time. It wasn't up to Ginsburg to retire. It was up to all of US to vote in a Democrat like Hillary so that when this happened an honorable successor could be appointed.
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@clairecmc
It's never been about saving the fetus. If it were, you'd see more bills funding pre-natal and post-natal care which we don't see at all.
It's always been about controlling women, limiting their choices, and passing judgment on them.
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Dear social media:
Debra Messing is NOT the center of the universe for Democrats.
...
That would be Dolly Parton. Or Lynda Carter.
Maybe Jorts. We're still working on it.
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Dear Princess Lilibet of Sussex:
The fate of Disney World Orlando is now in YOUR hands. The Rules Against Perpetuities for the Reedy Creek district are yours to command. Live long, claim your kingdom and end DeSantis' cruel tyranny!!!
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@farcryhomestead
@davidfrum
he trashed the captain in a speech aimed at the sailors who just cheered FOR their captain as he departed under orders.
This is NOT how to win a group of sailors to your argument, by insulting their hero and berating *them*.
Machiavelli has got to be spinning in his grave.
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@ZTPetrizzo
you'd think people espousing self-reliance and rugged individualism would BRING THEIR OWN SANDWICHES with them.
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@LEBassett
you should tell them the leaks are coming from the ones you know have the most White Power tattoos and that they're undercover ATF guys. Let THEM be paranoid for a change...
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@justinbaragona
I see a family diving into dumpsters and my first thought is "we need to improve our social services, raise minimum wage, and get families into decent housing."
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@indystartony
@Lehigh389
@VP
at some point, I swear to God Hillary ought to be able to sue the entire GOP for hypocrisy.
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@rachelweinerwp
@Popehat
"I am not a person"???
Then... by that argument Bauer doesn't have any rights at all. Bauer is a toaster oven and should be treated as such. /headdesk
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"Lock her up" is trending and I think this time it means Sidney Powell, for conspiracy to commit sedition, violating her ethics as a lawyer, and ruining the brand value of Diet Dr. Pepper forever.
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@J4Years
@KumarsSalehi
if you fly an A-10 low enough maybe the engine exhaust will melt the snow.
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@petemuntean
Dear
@SouthwestAir
If you are actually refusing to ensure your workers' health, I will actually refuse to fly with you.
And you would think
@Delta
would go out of their way to avoid association with
#DeltaCovid
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@PTMorillas
@WardieJerusalem
@AFP
this is 2020. there are no limits this year. - direct quote from the Murder Hornets, April 2020.
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@MediumSizeMeech
I hate to be that reply guy, but... the thing about vampirism is that it's a metaphor for the consumption of vitality (Blood, Sex, Soul, and yes Youth). There's a reason why most vampires present as royalty/upper class/rich people, with the victims being poor and young.
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@DreamboyOscar
@ChaChingChizzy
I'm not going to let my sons learn "how to hump" from some unqualified Google-fed site. I'm gonna make sure they learn from the best hump academies in the land.
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@blakehounshell
@dandrezner
is that a real chyron...?
...
...
...
I would like to congratulate Mexico on its successful cloning process. I'm just kind of curious if the other two Mexicos will go elsewhere on the map or just stack up on top of the original.
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Even MSNBC knows not to stare directly at the eclipse.
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@jaxdotcom
@katikokal
is this a Title IX violation? This is utter bull, a violation of personal health. Every student athlete - MALE as well as female - ought to boycott all games until this rule is gone.
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@washingtonpost
noticing that 1) Hillary Clinton hasn't been Sec of State in... 7 years and 2) this is happening just as trump's entire administration is mishandling records, phone calls, emails, security clearances and God Help us EVERYTHING ELSE in the White House.
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@millerlaurac18
@laura_relyea
(quietly puts away the Recommended Reading quick guides we have stacked at the library)
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@RonFilipkowski
Um, Disney stock went UP this afternoon after they announced the cancellation of the FL plan.
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@J_Hancock
trump can whine about his First Amendment rights all he wants - he's facing charges for his ACTIONS, not words - but this is the real attack on the First Amendment: Law enforcement raiding a local newspaper to *cover up* criminal misdeeds. That police chief needs to go to jail.
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@_KaylaBrantley
@nhannahjones
theft of someone else's mail is a federal crime. theft of an elected official's mail is a goddamned national security breach.
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@matthewstoller
Sorry but no. Communism requires a 2/3rds vote in both houses of Congress. At best Biden will achieve Creeping Socialism.
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@Popehat
@joshtpm
@DemFromCT
there is a constant psychological core to the bullies who rise up to be authoritarian dictators. That *they* are indispensable, that *they* are being harassed and pushed by lesser fools, and that *they* deserve to stay in power even when it becomes clear they cannot rule.
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@Phil_Lewis_
I was praying for her to win as well. That one scene from Wakanda Forever with all that rage and grief ("HAVE I NOT GIVEN EVERYTHING?") delivered with Shakespearean skill.
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@JeremyDBoreing
Women are not looking to outlaw men
Women are looking to outlaw bad behavior - rape, assault, domestic violence, workplace harassment, schoolplace harassment, public harassment, unfair wage discrimination, denial of health services - from men.
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@AP
so...
basically Rudy's own peeps were trying to profit the way he and trump were accusing Biden's son of profiting.
projection much, Giuliani?
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@nytpolitics
This is a dangerous attempt to reclassify a religious minority in a way that violates the separation between Church (Faith) and State (Politics).
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@emptywheel
I am livid at the Republican politicians who dove headfirst into this mudpit eager for Biden scandal, and I'm begging for the DOJ to open a grand jury investigation into espionage charges because I am sick of watching these so-called Americans sell us out to Putin. >:-(
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@npfandos
I hope next week Pelosi allows a vote to charge Barr with lying to Congress (something he did at least once during a Q&A with Congressman Crist). would love to see Barr joke about handcuffs then.
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@RonFilipkowski
In 1898 the Spanish-American war ended up with the United States claiming Puerto Rico, Guam, and the Philippines. The US did eventually grant independence to the Philippines but we're still holding Guam and failing to grant statehood to Puerto Rico.
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@ddayen
Did Texas and Florida receive loans in lieu of grants as well? I doubt it, which tells us the GOP is dumping on Puerto Rico. Again.
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@thehill
the follow-up question should be "How many Drudge followers are registered to vote Democratic?" I'm willing to bet the answer is between "Zero to less than 1 percent of the national Democratic base."
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@AndrewSolender
@MalcolmNance
she'll get her donators to help foot those bills somehow.
no, Greene deserves to get stripped of speaking privileges from the floor if she can't respect the safety rules. no more grandstanding for her.
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@W7VOA
@DCPoliceDept
@politico
if true, those off-duty cops should remain fully off-duty - as in UNEMPLOYED - before getting arrest for Sedition, and those military members should be court-martialed and expelled from our nation's armed forces.
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@TheOnion
no joke. the most profitable form of looting involves incorporated financial companies raiding other companies' pension plans.
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@RonFilipkowski
there's SIX national anthems:
Yankee Doodle Dandy
Star Spangled Banner
America The Beautiful
God Bless America
This Land Is Your Land
Born In the USA
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@BrandyZadrozny
I hope Alex Jones' public statements that he will refuse to pay means the judge can throw him in jail for contempt of court. Do it. Please, for the LOVE OF GOD. He will keep mocking everybody until he's sitting in a 4-by-4 cell.
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@_ElizabethMay
...as a librarian I'm pretty sure I've seen that book already...
(checks catalog)
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@DreabitKidStuff
@WentRogue
it's not that she doesn't know this.
it's that she doesn't CARE to know.
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@KFILE
that sort of rhetoric used to be a disqualifier. Especially considering the Secret Service is supposed to go after people who threaten the sitting President.
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@jkbjournalist
@GreatDismal
the investigation into Epstein's empire should NOT end with his death. There is too much corruption clearly involved, too many powers in high places who profited from rape and abuse and God knows anything worse.
#EpsteinSuicide
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I keep telling y'all if I do win a
#Powerball
jackpot - especially if it goes up to $750 million or more - I will set aside most of the money in a foundation to gift money to libraries, animal shelters, and new housing for homeless. The rest I will spend on becoming Batman.
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just a reminder America that Ames, IA is nowhere near Chicago. Nor is Racine, WI. Nor is Tulsa, OK. Nor is Uvalde, TX. Our gun violence problem is NATION-FUCKING-WIDE
#GunReformNow
BREAKING: Story County Sheriff’s Office & agencies are at Cornerstone Church in Ames. 911 calls came in just before 7 about an active shooter. We’re told there are 3 victims, including the shooter. There’s no ongoing threat. Details could change as police learn more.
@KCCINews
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@tsoamerica
@thehill
I know Mr. Rogers disowned doing this after he found out what it meant, but I think in this situation he would have willingly aimed at trump
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@ryanjreilly
my previous views of Congress putting signs up on display were usually that of charts and graphs to demonstrate points of their argument. I HAVE NEVER SEEN A PROPAGANDIST RALLY SIGN for a MAGA Tea Party gathering on display before.
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@pattonoswalt
"When you're an Orc
You're an Orc all the way
From your first hobbit roast
Til your last dying (gets shot by Legolas)"
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@JRubinBlogger
@MSNBC
we've been telling you for the longest time
"Its
O
K
If
You
Are
Republican"
has been the excuse for every hypocritical Republican the last 40 years.
#IOKIYAR
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@luca_a_powell
So all complaints about police brutality should be filed against the police chief and the city manager and the council members, right?
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@AdamSerwer
he's like the guy from high school who keeps crowing about scoring three touchdowns in his senior year high school football game, ignoring the facts his team lost that game and his own knee got blown out.
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@Angry_Staffer
the nuclear programs docs are the coffin nails: he implicitly cannot declassify those documents by himself (Dept of Energy has to co-sign, I believe). Keeping those after leaving the White House, lacking security clearance after Jan 2021, and refusing to return them? he's toast.
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@TheJamesLasher
@AP
it IS. but the legal system has been allowing businesses/corporations to make false statements and weakening any "truth in advertising" that consumers really need.
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@DublinAirport
wait, did you hire Kate after December 28th 2023??? 'Cause we've been looking for a Kate since round then...
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@facebookvillain
"Thou shalt not make a machine in the likeness of a human mind." - Butlerian Jihad
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@PatrickRuffini
You know who would like high-speed Internet/broadband? The rural areas. My library - several others - checks out Hotspots to people living in the most remote parts of Polk County. It's the most popular thing on hold, even more than "Where the Crawdads Sing."
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to everyone screaming about it being Rapture Day:
we all had a freaking Eclipse back in 2017 and y'all didn't have a freakout THEN.
this isn't an Act of God, it's the precision clockwork of the universe on display, and it happens all the time.
SO SETTLE THE EFF DOWN.
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@curaffairs
you gotta admit a railway to Hawaii would be a massive feat of engineering that would be the envy of the world. I approve.
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@AshaRangappa_
@KellyAnnePolls
If you can order a delivery of cupcakes to your door, you can order an elections ballot to your door. A=B.
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To all the Far Right wingnuts screaming "25TH AMENDMENT" at Joe Biden, just a reminder that would mean Kamala Harris becomes President and she can make Hillary Clinton her Veep.
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@torriangray
and I stopped laughing at that point.
Of the several reasons I loathe Texas, the domination of school textbook ordering (which disproportionately affects the rest of the nation) is near the top of my list. >:(
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Dear Canada:
We're real sorry the white racist Nazi-flag-waving anti-vaxxing assholes infected your country.
Signed,
the seventy percent of Americans who did vax and mask for our nation's well-being
#AmbassadorBridgeBlockade
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@online_shawn
@nycsouthpaw
any media pundit who questions her "likability" and "approachability" are clearly blind and biased.
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@ChileHenge
@MollyJongFast
you're supposed to ask for good health, tax-deductible fortune with receipts (never let a Djinn wish you money the IRS doesn't have paperwork on), and your enemies humiliated in prison for crimes they genuinely committed. A resignation notice on a webpage doesn't cut it, Djinn!
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@BarakRavid
count the votes first. Actually, first kick all the Russian hackers on Putin's payroll out of the room, then count the votes.
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#ThatMexicanThing
is trending. I hope that means "Latino voter turnout is gonna break records".
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@PageSix
So?
Have you shared the same concern for guys who have been in jail for 30-40 years for stealing a loaf of bread to feed the kids?
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